[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 01/12/2004 by yoyology
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I hoped to create a caption
set that would not make him seem like an animal.
Is he not capable of love
Though his body is large?
It is his secret sorrow
that attracted this beauty.

There is indeed beauty
even in the simple captions
at MostEmailed. To our sorrow
It is too often the animal
picture or the large
and ugly that Yahoo emailers love

How can you not love
this simple, natural beauty?
He is, of course, large,
but at the same time, small. A good caption
will give us an idea of how the animal
truly feels. Is it sorrow?

My own sorrow
is that we do not love
the Earth's animals
more. It is their beauty
that this caption
seeks to encapsulate. A task too large.

Her breasts are large,
yes, but her life surely includes sorrow.
Her exploitation is why this caption
exists. The act of love
performed without a sense of beauty
is merely the act of an animal.

But would an animal
seek to enlarge
parts of its body simply for beauty?
This is the sorrow
of man, that love
is never enough. Otherwise, I would not caption.
(Fashion Wire Daily)


The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


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apple juice is a verbCaption Monkie18:02:57Alternatiphized #23
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Mr. NonameLurker12:58:52Caption #24
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Comments on Alternatives [Add Comment]

There are 8 comments for this caption.

<yoyology> And the envoy:
The caption monkie is an animal
with a large capacity for love
and beauty, but each of us has our own secret sorrow.
<yoyology> I threatened to do it a long time ago. Here it is, folks, the caption sestina!
<apple juice is a verb> Yes, my point exactly.
<Axolotl> Wow..that sure beats the double dactyl.
<yoyology> I didn't notice when I composed it, but the first stanza in each caption addresses the image, while the second is more meta.
<3Suns> ... my god... it's full of awesome!
<Lauren> Wow, yoyo, don't let anyone tell you that you got nothing done at work today!
<ElvisThePelvis> This reads like an epic poem, a paean to captioning AND the mammal condition. Notice I didn't say the mammry condition...

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