I have a private jet. I get wheeled everywhere in a comfy wheelchair - and nothing is wrong with my legs.
If I want to see bullfighting, they fly matadors and bulls for a private show in my palace.
If I turn my thumb down during the show, the bull wins.
With my money I can afford owls trained to massage my shoulders, monkeys trained to run my bath, and dogs trained to lick my balls.
Actually, you can afford that last item.
The challenge was to take the top 3
emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about
the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.
Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.
All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.