Most Emailed Photos

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004

by Mort

<-- First

Choose an alternative caption: >

Last -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"

(AFP)

(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.

History

These 5 things happened most recently.

Mr. Noname Lurker 15:05:46 drooled over #54

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:46 drooled over #666

Mr. Noname Lurker 13:52:24 drooled over #76

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:51:51 drooled over #102

Mr. Noname Lurker 09:22:14 drooled over #555

Current Users

There have been 301 users in the last 10 minutes.

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:48 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:48 Caption #103

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:40 Caption #869

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:35 Caption #286

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:31 Caption #660

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:28 Caption #625

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:27 Caption #4

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:24 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:23 Caption #858

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:22 Caption #890

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:21 Caption #582

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:20 Caption #644

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:19 Caption #0

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:18 Caption #615

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:17 Caption #4

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:16 Caption #112

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:15 Caption #48

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:14 Caption #955

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:13 Caption #657

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:12 Caption #841

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:11 Caption #-39

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:10 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:09 Caption #-3

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:08 Caption #0

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:07 Caption #7

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:06 Caption #22

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:04 Caption #814

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:44:03 Caption #533

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:59 Caption #185

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:57 Caption #142

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:53 Caption #634

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:50 Caption #482

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:49 Caption #499

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:48 Caption #547

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:47 Caption #418

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:46 Caption #38

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:45 Caption #162

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:43 Caption #308

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:42 Caption #594

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:37 Caption #647

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:36 Caption #89

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:32 Caption #50

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:31 Caption #131

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:30 Caption #233

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:29 Caption #45

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:28 Caption #312

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:25 Caption #530

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:23 Caption #708

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:22 Caption #63

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:20 Caption #441

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:19 Caption #889

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:18 Caption #455

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:17 Caption #518

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:16 Caption #499

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:15 Caption #814

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:14 Caption #651

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:12 Caption #48

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:11 Caption #101

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:08 Caption #519

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:04 Caption #809

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:03 Caption #892

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:02 Caption #560

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:01 Caption #89

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:43:00 Caption #412

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:59 Caption #438

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:58 Caption #734

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:57 Caption #441

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:56 Caption #145

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:52 Caption #81

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:50 Caption #285

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:48 Caption #435

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:47 Caption #59

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:46 Caption #336

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:45 Caption #162

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:44 Caption #485

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:42 Caption #780

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:41 Caption #537

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:40 Caption #142

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:39 Caption #856

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:38 Caption #929

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:37 Caption #495

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:31 Caption #901

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:29 Caption #792

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:27 Caption #397

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:24 Caption #922

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:19 Caption #392

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:17 Caption #88

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:15 Caption #195

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:13 Caption #843

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:11 Caption #691

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:08 Caption #506

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:07 Caption #239

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:04 Caption #98

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:03 Caption #356

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:02 Caption #255

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:01 Caption #599

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:42:00 Caption #292

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:59 Caption #370

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:58 Caption #739

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:57 Caption #577

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:56 Caption #59

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:55 Caption #302

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:54 Caption #187

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:52 Caption #144

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:48 Caption #771

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:43 Caption #772

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:39 Caption #684

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:38 Caption #591

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:37 Caption #621

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:36 Caption #669

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:35 Caption #715

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:34 Caption #-65

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:26 Caption #78

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:22 Caption #230

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:19 Caption #0

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:17 Caption #848

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:16 Caption #14

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:11 Caption #157

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:10 Caption #436

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:09 Caption #807

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:08 Caption #866

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:07 Caption #421

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:06 Caption #46

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:05 Caption #377

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:41:03 Caption #12

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:59 Caption #95

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:55 Caption #47

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:54 Caption #560

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:53 Caption #238

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:52 Caption #325

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:43 Caption #25

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:41 Caption #83

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:40 Caption #133

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:39 Caption #457

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:36 Caption #824

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:34 Caption #200

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:32 Caption #835

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:31 Caption #453

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:30 Caption #297

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:28 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:26 Caption #533

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:25 Caption #349

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:24 Caption #811

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:23 Caption #706

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:22 Caption #92

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:08 Caption #147

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:07 Caption #482

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:04 Caption #13

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:40:03 Caption #729

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:59 Caption #82

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:55 Caption #485

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:54 Caption #68

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:53 Caption #346

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:44 Caption #193

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:39 Caption #686

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:35 Caption #491

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:34 Caption #905

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:33 Caption #261

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:32 Caption #653

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:31 Caption #884

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:28 Caption #844

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:27 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:26 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:25 Caption #953

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:23 Caption #234

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:22 Caption #732

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:21 Caption #806

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:19 Caption #123

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:15 Caption #214

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:13 Caption #220

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:12 Caption #488

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:11 Caption #643

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:10 Caption #491

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:08 Caption #611

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:04 Caption #69

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:03 Caption #580

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:02 Caption #397

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:39:00 Caption #632

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:55 Caption #545

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:54 Caption #187

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:51 Caption #371

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:47 Caption #499

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:46 Caption #214

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:45 Caption #663

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:44 Caption #707

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:43 Caption #182

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:42 Caption #49

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:39 Caption #364

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:36 Caption #328

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:35 Caption #-14

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:31 Caption #253

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:30 Caption #1

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:24 Caption #918

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:23 Caption #57

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:18 Caption #590

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:17 Caption #483

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:16 Caption #154

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:11 Caption #207

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:08 Caption #677

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:07 Caption #599

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:04 Caption #564

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:03 Caption #757

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:02 Caption #415

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:01 Caption #843

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:38:00 Caption #791

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:59 Caption #220

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:58 Caption #632

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:55 Caption #131

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:54 Caption #968

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:53 Caption #566

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:52 Caption #-33

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:51 Caption #280

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:49 Caption #306

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:46 Caption #14

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:45 Caption #802

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:38 Caption #656

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:37 Caption #511

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:36 Caption #928

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:35 Caption #600

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:34 Caption #73

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:32 Caption #91

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:31 Caption #525

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:28 Caption #406

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:24 Caption #341

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:21 Caption #278

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:20 Caption #61

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:19 Caption #482

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:18 Caption #574

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:16 Caption #238

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:15 Caption #517

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:13 Caption #29

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:11 Caption #521

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:10 Caption #13

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:09 Caption #686

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:08 Caption #265

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:06 Caption #523

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:02 Caption #600

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:37:00 Caption #236

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:59 Caption #617

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:55 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:52 Caption #73

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:50 Caption #741

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:47 Caption #370

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:46 Caption #578

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:45 Caption #267

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:44 Caption #475

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:43 Caption #203

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:39 Caption #642

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:35 Caption #286

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:34 Caption #674

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:33 Caption #755

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:31 Caption #836

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:26 Caption #613

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:25 Caption #393

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:24 Caption #517

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:23 Caption #577

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:22 Caption #25

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:21 Caption #303

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:20 Caption #304

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:19 Caption #221

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:17 Caption #566

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:11 Caption #63

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:07 Caption #248

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:36:05 Caption #769

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:59 Caption #398

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:54 Caption #456

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:53 Caption #833

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:52 Caption #605

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:51 Caption #89

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:49 Caption #295

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:47 Caption #68

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:44 Caption #173

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:43 Caption #262

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:42 Caption #597

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:39 Caption #399

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:38 Caption #912

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:37 Caption #178

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:35 Caption #90

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:33 Caption #861

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:32 Caption #30

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:31 Caption #481

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:30 Caption #87

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:29 Caption #441

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:28 Caption #29

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:25 Caption #539

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:21 Caption #397

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:20 Caption #74

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:19 Caption #340

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:15 Caption #536

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:13 Caption #455

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:12 Caption #166

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:11 Caption #1

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:10 Caption #177

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:08 Caption #212

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:04 Caption #510

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:03 Caption #3

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:01 Caption #254

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:35:00 Caption #8

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:34:55 Caption #62

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:34:51 Caption #71

Mr. Noname Lurker 00:34:48 Caption #433

Board

[Post Message]

I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.

There are 16 messages for this day.

<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.

<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.

<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!

<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!

<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.

<Mort> Pretty much.

<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.

<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work

<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.

Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post