[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)
Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 330 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:41Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:40Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:36Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:35Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:34Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:33Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:32Caption #725
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:31Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:30Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:29Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:27Caption #322
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:26Caption #890
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:25Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:24Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:23Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:22Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:21Caption #870
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:20Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:19Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:18Caption #917
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:17Caption #887
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:16Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:15Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:14Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:13Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:12Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:11Caption #138
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:10Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:07Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:02Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:59Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:53Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:50Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:42Caption #859
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:41Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:40Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:38Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:37Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:35Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:23Caption #475
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:21Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:20Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:18Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:17Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:16Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:15Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:14Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:13Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:12Caption #766
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:11Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:10Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:09Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:08Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:07Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:06Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:05Caption #799
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:04Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:03Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:02Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:01Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:00Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:00Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:58Caption #673
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:57Caption #959
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:56Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:55Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:54Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:52Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:51Caption #385
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:49Caption #841
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:48Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:47Caption #863
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:46Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:45Caption #897
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:44Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:43Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:42Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:41Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:40Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:27Caption #320
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:24Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:23Caption #241
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:22Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:21Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:20Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:19Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:18Caption #224
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:17Caption #288
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:16Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:15Caption #241
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:14Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:10Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:09Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:08Caption #867
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:07Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:06Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:02Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:01Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:00Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:59Caption #833
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:58Caption #940
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:57Caption #906
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:56Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:55Caption #899
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:54Caption #456
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:53Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:50Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:49Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:48Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:47Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:46Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:45Caption #122
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:44Caption #890
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:43Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:42Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:41Caption #323
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:40Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:39Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:38Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:37Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:36Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:35Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:34Caption #783
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:33Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:32Caption #725
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:31Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:30Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:29Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:28Caption #883
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:27Caption #764
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:18Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:14Caption #944
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:09Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:08Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:06Caption #274
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:05Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:04Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:03Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:02Caption #331
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:01Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:01Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:59Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:43Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:39Caption #890
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:32Caption #281
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:31Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:17Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:16Caption #588
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:15Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:14Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:13Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:12Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:11Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:10Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:09Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:08Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:07Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:06Caption #426
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:05Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:04Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:03Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:02Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:01Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:00Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:59Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:55Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:54Caption #838
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:53Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:52Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:51Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:50Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:49Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:48Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:47Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:46Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:45Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:44Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:43Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:35Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:24Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:23Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:23Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:21Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:20Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:19Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:18Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:17Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:11Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:10Caption #182
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:09Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:08Caption #314
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:07Caption #562
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:06Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:05Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:04Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:03Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:02Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:01Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:00Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:59Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:56Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:55Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:51Caption #919
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:47Caption #288
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:46Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:30Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:29Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:28Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:27Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:26Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:25Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:24Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:23Caption #491
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:22Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:21Caption #309
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:20Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:19Caption #242
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:18Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:17Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:16Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:15Caption #435
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:14Caption #98
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:13Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:12Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:11Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:10Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:09Caption #329
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:06Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:05Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:03Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:02Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:55Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:54Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:53Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:52Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:51Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:50Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:49Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:48Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:47Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:46Caption #385
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:45Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:43Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:42Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:41Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:40Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:39Caption #231
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:38Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:37Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:36Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:35Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:34Caption #558
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:33Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:32Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:28Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:26Caption #949
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:25Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:24Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:23Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:22Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:21Caption #960
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:20Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:19Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:18Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:14Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:12Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:03Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:02Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:01Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:00Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:59Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:58Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:57Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:56Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:55Caption #80
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:54Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:53Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:52Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:51Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:50Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:48Caption #151
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:47Caption #802
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:46Caption #892
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:45Caption #331
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:44Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:43Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:42Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:41Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:40Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:39Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:38Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:37Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:36Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:35Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:34Caption #191
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:33Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:32Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:19Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:15Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:10Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:07Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:06Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:05Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:04Caption #-43
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:03Caption #-19
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:02Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:01Caption #857
Mr. NonameLurker16:01:00Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:41Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:40Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:39Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:38Caption #411
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:30Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:19Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:18Caption #487
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:17Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:16Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:15Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:08Caption #487
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:07Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:07Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:05Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:03Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker16:00:00Caption #391
Mr. NonameLurker15:59:59Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker15:59:58Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker15:59:57Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker15:59:48Caption #635
Mr. NonameLurker15:59:47Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker15:59:43Caption #341

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.

There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post