[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)
Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 455 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:55Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:54Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:53Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:52Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:51Caption #838
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:50Caption #635
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:49Caption #685
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:48Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:45Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:44Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:42Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:41Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:38Caption #479
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:37Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:35Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:34Caption #630
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:33Caption #475
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:32Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:31Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:30Caption #677
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:29Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:28Caption #870
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:26Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:25Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:24Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:23Caption #635
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:22Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:21Caption #224
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:20Caption #867
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:19Caption #755
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:17Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:16Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:13Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:12Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:08Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:07Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:06Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:05Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:04Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:03Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:02Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:01Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker21:37:00Caption #256
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:58Caption #414
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:57Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:56Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:53Caption #426
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:52Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:49Caption #842
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:48Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:47Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:46Caption #50
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:45Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:43Caption #938
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:41Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:40Caption #553
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:39Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:37Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:36Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:35Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:34Caption #609
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:32Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:31Caption #762
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:30Caption #388
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:29Caption #692
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:28Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:26Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:23Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:20Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:19Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:18Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:17Caption #414
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:15Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:11Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:10Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:08Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:07Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:06Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:05Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:04Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:03Caption #211
Mr. NonameLurker21:36:01Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:59Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:58Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:57Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:56Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:55Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:54Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:53Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:52Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:51Caption #766
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:50Caption #98
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:49Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:48Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:47Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:46Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:44Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:43Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:41Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:40Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:39Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:37Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:36Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:35Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:34Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:32Caption #51
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:31Caption #674
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:30Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:27Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:24Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:23Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:22Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:21Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:19Caption #444
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:18Caption #701
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:15Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:13Caption #33
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:12Caption #815
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:11Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:10Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:09Caption #275
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:08Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:07Caption #204
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:06Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:05Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:02Caption #916
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:01Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker21:35:00Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:56Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:55Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:54Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:52Caption #288
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:51Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:50Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:49Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:48Caption #415
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:47Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:46Caption #836
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:45Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:44Caption #151
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:43Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:42Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:40Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:38Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:37Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:36Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:35Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:34Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:33Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:32Caption #774
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:29Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:27Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:24Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:23Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:22Caption #505
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:21Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:19Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:18Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:17Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:16Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:15Caption #582
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:14Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:13Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:12Caption #309
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:11Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:10Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:09Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:08Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:07Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:06Caption #802
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:05Caption #486
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:04Caption #138
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:02Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:01Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker21:34:00Caption #470
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:59Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:58Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:57Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:56Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:55Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:54Caption #449
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:53Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:50Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:49Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:47Caption #825
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:46Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:45Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:43Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:42Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:41Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:40Caption #-25
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:39Caption #883
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:37Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:36Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:34Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:33Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:30Caption #724
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:27Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:26Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:25Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:24Caption #632
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:23Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:22Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:21Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:20Caption #659
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:19Caption #921
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:18Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:17Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:16Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:13Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:12Caption #839
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:11Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:08Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:07Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:06Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:05Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:04Caption #810
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:03Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:01Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker21:33:00Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:58Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:57Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:56Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:55Caption #842
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:54Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:53Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:51Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:47Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:45Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:44Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:43Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:42Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:40Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:37Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:35Caption #899
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:34Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:32Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:31Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:29Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:28Caption #103
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:26Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:24Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:21Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:20Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:19Caption #528
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:18Caption #771
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:17Caption #562
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:16Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:15Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:14Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:12Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:09Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:07Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:06Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:05Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:04Caption #-83
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:02Caption #-51
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:01Caption #850
Mr. NonameLurker21:32:00Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:59Caption #803
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:58Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:57Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:56Caption #51
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:55Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:54Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:53Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:51Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:49Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:48Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:47Caption #938
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:46Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:45Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:44Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:43Caption #551
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:40Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:39Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:38Caption #-52
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:36Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:35Caption #327
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:34Caption #449
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:33Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:32Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:31Caption #909
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:30Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:29Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:28Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:27Caption #-8
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:26Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:25Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:24Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:23Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:22Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:20Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:19Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:18Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:17Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:16Caption #-39
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:15Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:14Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:13Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:11Caption #674
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:10Caption #537
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:08Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:07Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:06Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:05Caption #732
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:02Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:00Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:59Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:58Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:56Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:55Caption #638
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:54Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:52Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:51Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:50Caption #309
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:49Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:48Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:47Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:46Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:45Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:44Caption #773
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:42Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:41Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:40Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:38Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:37Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:36Caption #229
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:35Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:34Caption #963
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:33Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:32Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:31Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:30Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:27Caption #444
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:26Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:25Caption #229
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:24Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:22Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:21Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:20Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:19Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:18Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:17Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:16Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:15Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:13Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:12Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:11Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:10Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:06Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:03Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:02Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:01Caption #363
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:00Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:59Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:58Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:57Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:56Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:54Caption #555
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:53Caption #659
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:52Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:51Caption #915
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:50Caption #238
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:47Caption #855
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:46Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:45Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:43Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:42Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:41Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:40Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:39Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:38Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:37Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:34Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:33Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:32Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:31Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:30Caption #501
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:29Caption #635
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:28Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:27Caption #537
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:22Caption #122
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:21Caption #289
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:19Caption #363
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:18Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:16Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:13Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:12Caption #762
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:10Caption #851
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:07Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:05Caption #327
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:04Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:03Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:02Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:01Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:00Caption #96
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:59Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:58Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:56Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:55Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:54Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:53Caption #774
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:52Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:51Caption #-21
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:49Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:48Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:47Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:45Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:43Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:42Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:41Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:40Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:39Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:38Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:37Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:36Caption #-8
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:35Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:34Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:33Caption #-38
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:32Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:31Caption #-43
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:30Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:29Caption #-42
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:28Caption #975
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:27Caption #388
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:26Caption #836
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:25Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:24Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:23Caption #456
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:22Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:21Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:20Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:19Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:18Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:17Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:16Caption #745
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:15Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:14Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:11Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:10Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:09Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:07Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:06Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:05Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:04Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:03Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:02Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:01Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:00Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:59Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:58Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:57Caption #899
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:56Caption #521
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:55Caption #390

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.

There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post