[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 353 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:16Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:15Caption #553
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:14Caption #550
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:13Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:12Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:10Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:09Caption #874
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:07Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:05Caption #634
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:04Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:03Caption #577
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:02Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:01Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker10:58:00Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:57Caption #367
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:56Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:55Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:54Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:53Caption #327
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:52Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:51Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:50Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:49Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:48Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:47Caption #784
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:46Caption #493
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:45Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:44Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:43Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:42Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:41Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:40Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:39Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:38Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:37Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:36Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:35Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:34Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:33Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:32Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:29Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:27Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:26Caption #951
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:25Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:24Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:22Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:21Caption #824
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:20Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:19Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:18Caption #825
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:17Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:16Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:15Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:14Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:13Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:12Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:11Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:10Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:09Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:08Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:07Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:06Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:05Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:04Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:03Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:02Caption #829
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:01Caption #243
Mr. NonameLurker10:57:00Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:59Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:58Caption #727
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:57Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:56Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:55Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:54Caption #891
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:53Caption #974
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:52Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:51Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:50Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:49Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:48Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:47Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:46Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:45Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:44Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:43Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:42Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:41Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:40Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:39Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:38Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:37Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:36Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:35Caption #532
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:34Caption #544
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:33Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:32Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:31Caption #871
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:30Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:29Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:28Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:27Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:26Caption #437
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:25Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:24Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:23Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:22Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:21Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:20Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:19Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:18Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:17Caption #204
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:16Caption #107
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:15Caption #952
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:14Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:13Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:12Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:11Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:10Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:09Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:08Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:07Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:06Caption #501
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:05Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:04Caption #265
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:03Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:02Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:01Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker10:56:00Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:59Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:57Caption #737
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:55Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:54Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:53Caption #-19
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:52Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:50Caption #859
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:49Caption #82
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:48Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:47Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:46Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:45Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:44Caption #935
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:43Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:42Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:41Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:40Caption #471
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:39Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:38Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:37Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:36Caption #103
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:35Caption #42
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:34Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:33Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:32Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:31Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:30Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:29Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:28Caption #553
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:27Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:26Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:25Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:24Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:23Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:22Caption #761
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:21Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:20Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:19Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:18Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:17Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:16Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:15Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:14Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:13Caption #842
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:12Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:11Caption #444
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:10Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:09Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:08Caption #532
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:07Caption #848
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:06Caption #272
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:05Caption #43
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:04Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:03Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:02Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:01Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker10:55:00Caption #271
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:59Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:58Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:57Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:56Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:55Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:54Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:53Caption #916
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:52Caption #50
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:51Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:50Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:49Caption #930
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:48Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:47Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:46Caption #31
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:45Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:44Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:43Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:42Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:41Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:40Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:39Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:38Caption #652
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:37Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:36Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:35Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:34Caption #810
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:33Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:32Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:31Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:30Caption #368
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:29Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:28Caption #-41
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:27Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:26Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:25Caption #301
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:23Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:21Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:19Caption #725
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:18Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:16Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:15Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:14Caption #862
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:13Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:13Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:12Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:10Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:09Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:08Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:07Caption #862
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:06Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:05Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:04Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:03Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:02Caption #963
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:01Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker10:54:00Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:59Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:58Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:57Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:56Caption #656
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:55Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:54Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:53Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:52Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:51Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:50Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:49Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:48Caption #764
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:47Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:46Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:45Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:44Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:43Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:42Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:41Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:39Caption #139
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:38Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:37Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:36Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:35Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:34Caption #199
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:33Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:32Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:31Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:30Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:29Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:28Caption #534
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:27Caption #699
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:25Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:24Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:23Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:22Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:21Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:19Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:18Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:17Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:15Caption #967
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:14Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:13Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:10Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:09Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:07Caption #685
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:06Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:05Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:03Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:02Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker10:53:00Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:59Caption #809
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:58Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:56Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:55Caption #372
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:54Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:53Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:49Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:48Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:45Caption #84
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:44Caption #342
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:42Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:41Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:40Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:39Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:37Caption #243
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:36Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:34Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:33Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:30Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:29Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:26Caption #851
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:25Caption #517
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:24Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:21Caption #405
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:17Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:16Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:13Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:12Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:11Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:09Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:08Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:07Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:06Caption #108
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:05Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:04Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:01Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker10:52:00Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:59Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:57Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:56Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:53Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:52Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:49Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:48Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:45Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:43Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:42Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:41Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:39Caption #859
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:38Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:37Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:33Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:29Caption #880
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:28Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:27Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:25Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:23Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:22Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:19Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:17Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker10:51:17Caption #563

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.


There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post