[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)
Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 328 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:43Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:42Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:41Caption #869
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:41Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:39Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:38Caption #834
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:37Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:36Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:35Caption #931
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:34Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:33Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:32Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:31Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:30Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:30Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:28Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:27Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:26Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:25Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:24Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:23Caption #324
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:22Caption #493
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:21Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:20Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:19Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:18Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:17Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:16Caption #853
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:15Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:14Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:13Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:12Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:11Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:09Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:08Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:06Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:05Caption #732
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:04Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:02Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:01Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:00Caption #897
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:59Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:57Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:55Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:54Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:53Caption #-24
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:52Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:51Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:50Caption #-34
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:49Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:48Caption #-57
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:47Caption #-74
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:46Caption #-55
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:45Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:43Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:41Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:40Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:35Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:34Caption #638
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:33Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:29Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:28Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:27Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:25Caption #878
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:24Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:23Caption #647
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:18Caption #839
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:16Caption #415
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:15Caption #586
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:14Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:13Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:12Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:11Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:10Caption #139
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:09Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:08Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:07Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:06Caption #322
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:05Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:04Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:03Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:02Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:01Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:00Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:59Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:58Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:57Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:56Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:55Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:54Caption #265
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:53Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:52Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:51Caption #774
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:50Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:49Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:48Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:44Caption #238
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:43Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:41Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:38Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:36Caption #809
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:34Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:31Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:29Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:28Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:27Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:26Caption #867
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:25Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:24Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:23Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:22Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:21Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:20Caption #940
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:19Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:18Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:15Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:14Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:12Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:08Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:06Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:03Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:58Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:57Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:56Caption #449
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:55Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:54Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:53Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:52Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:51Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:50Caption #586
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:49Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:48Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:47Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:46Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:45Caption #797
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:44Caption #858
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:37Caption #540
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:36Caption #51
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:35Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:34Caption #63
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:33Caption #435
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:32Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:31Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:30Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:29Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:28Caption #873
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:22Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:19Caption #-2
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:18Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:17Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:16Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:15Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:14Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:14Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:12Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:11Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:10Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:09Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:07Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:06Caption #43
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:02Caption #-3
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:00Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:59Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:57Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:53Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:52Caption #905
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:49Caption #710
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:48Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:47Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:46Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:44Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:43Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:41Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:40Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:39Caption #377
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:38Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:37Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:36Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:35Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:34Caption #954
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:33Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:31Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:30Caption #647
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:26Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:24Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:20Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:16Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:15Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:14Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:13Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:12Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:11Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:10Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:09Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:09Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:07Caption #803
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:04Caption #-12
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:02Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:00Caption #732
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:59Caption #505
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:58Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:57Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:56Caption #672
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:55Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:54Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:53Caption #338
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:52Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:51Caption #204
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:48Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:47Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:46Caption #117
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:44Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:43Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:41Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:39Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:37Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:36Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:35Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:32Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:30Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:29Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:27Caption #916
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:25Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:22Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:21Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:19Caption #916
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:17Caption #974
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:16Caption #800
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:15Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:14Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:13Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:12Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:11Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:10Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:09Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:08Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:07Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:06Caption #346
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:05Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:00Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:55Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:53Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:51Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:49Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:48Caption #329
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:44Caption #33
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:38Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:37Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:36Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:35Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:34Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:33Caption #-2
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:32Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:31Caption #191
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:30Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:29Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:27Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:24Caption #785
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:22Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:18Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:16Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:15Caption #972
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:14Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:13Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:09Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:07Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:04Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:58Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:54Caption #550
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:50Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:49Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:47Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:44Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:43Caption #662
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:39Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:38Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:34Caption #490
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:29Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:25Caption #909
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:24Caption #352
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:21Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:20Caption #775
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:19Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:14Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:04Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:03Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:01Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:00Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:49Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:48Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:47Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:42Caption #470
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:39Caption #550
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:39Caption #550
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:32Caption #821
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:29Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:20Caption #276
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:19Caption #841
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:18Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:17Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:14Caption #275
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:59Caption #677
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:56Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:54Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:53Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:52Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:50Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:45Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:42Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:39Caption #271
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:34Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:29Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:25Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:20Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:13Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:12Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:11Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:08Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:06Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:03Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:02Caption #84
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:59Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:58Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:52Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:50Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:49Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:47Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:43Caption #17

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.

There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post