[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)
Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 287 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:36Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:35Caption #797
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:34Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:33Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:32Caption #881
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:31Caption #-41
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:30Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:29Caption #-16
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:28Caption #-43
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:27Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:26Caption #-12
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:25Caption #-22
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:24Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:23Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:22Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:21Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:20Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:19Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:18Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:17Caption #355
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:16Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:15Caption #289
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:14Caption #817
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:13Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:12Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:11Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:10Caption #725
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:04Caption #405
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:02Caption #241
Mr. NonameLurker18:26:00Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:59Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:58Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:57Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:56Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:55Caption #405
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:54Caption #666
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:53Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:52Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:51Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:50Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:49Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:48Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:47Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:46Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:45Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:44Caption #846
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:40Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:39Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:38Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:37Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:36Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:35Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:34Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:32Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:31Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:30Caption #282
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:29Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:28Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:27Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:26Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:25Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:24Caption #288
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:23Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:22Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:21Caption #884
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:20Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:19Caption #925
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:18Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:17Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:15Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:14Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:13Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:12Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:09Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:05Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:04Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:02Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:01Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:00Caption #-72
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:58Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:56Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:55Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:54Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:53Caption #293
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:52Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:51Caption #657
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:50Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:49Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:48Caption #973
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:47Caption #952
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:46Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:45Caption #414
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:44Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:43Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:41Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:40Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:39Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:38Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:35Caption #426
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:34Caption #901
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:33Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:32Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:31Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:30Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:29Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:28Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:27Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:26Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:25Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:24Caption #868
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:23Caption #528
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:22Caption #249
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:21Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:19Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:17Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:14Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:13Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:11Caption #157
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:09Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:08Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:07Caption #792
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:06Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:05Caption #351
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:04Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:03Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:02Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:01Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:00Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:59Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:58Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:57Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:56Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:55Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:54Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:53Caption #701
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:52Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:51Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:50Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:49Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:48Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:47Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:46Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:45Caption #544
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:44Caption #806
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:40Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:37Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:36Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:35Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:32Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:31Caption #470
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:30Caption #470
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:29Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:28Caption #400
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:27Caption #252
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:26Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:25Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:24Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:23Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:22Caption #43
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:21Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:20Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:19Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:18Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:17Caption #411
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:16Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:15Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:14Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:13Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:12Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:11Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:10Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:09Caption #856
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:08Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:07Caption #331
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:06Caption #231
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:05Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:04Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:03Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:02Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:01Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:00Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:58Caption #586
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:57Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:57Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:53Caption #372
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:52Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:51Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:49Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:48Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:46Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:45Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:44Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:43Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:42Caption #855
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:41Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:40Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:39Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:38Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:37Caption #850
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:36Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:35Caption #901
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:33Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:30Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:29Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:28Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:27Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:26Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:25Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:22Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:21Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:18Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:16Caption #33
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:14Caption #862
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:11Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:10Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:09Caption #461
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:08Caption #762
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:06Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:05Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:04Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:03Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:02Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:00Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:58Caption #855
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:57Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:55Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:54Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:51Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:48Caption #896
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:47Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:46Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:45Caption #
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:44Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:43Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:40Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:39Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:38Caption #666
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:37Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:36Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:35Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:33Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:32Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:31Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:29Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:28Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:27Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:26Caption #902
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:25Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:24Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:22Caption #545
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:21Caption #884
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:20Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:18Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:17Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:14Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:13Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:11Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:10Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:09Caption #553
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:08Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:06Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:04Caption #908
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:03Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:01Caption #745
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:57Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:54Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:52Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:51Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:50Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:49Caption #899
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:48Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:47Caption #846
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:46Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:45Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:44Caption #652
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:42Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:39Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:38Caption #626
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:37Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:36Caption #975
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:35Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:33Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:32Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:31Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:30Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:29Caption #545
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:26Caption #652

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.

There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post