[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 332 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:41Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:38Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:34Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:33Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:31Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:29Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:28Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:26Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:22Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:21Caption #215
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:19Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:18Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:17Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:13Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:12Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:10Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:08Caption #991
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:05Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:02Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:01Caption #96
Mr. NonameLurker18:25:00Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:58Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:57Caption #908
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:55Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:52Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:50Caption #833
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:47Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:46Caption #191
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:45Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:43Caption #981
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:42Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:41Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:37Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:34Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:33Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:32Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:31Caption #368
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:29Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:25Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:23Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:22Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:21Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:19Caption #250
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:18Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:17Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:13Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:09Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:05Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:04Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker18:24:01Caption #505
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:57Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:55Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:53Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:52Caption #952
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:49Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:46Caption #276
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:45Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:44Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:43Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:42Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:41Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:38Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:35Caption #337
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:33Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:32Caption #770
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:30Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:29Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:27Caption #907
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:25Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:23Caption #202
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:21Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:19Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:17Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:15Caption #449
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:13Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:09Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:08Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:05Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:04Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:03Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:02Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:01Caption #869
Mr. NonameLurker18:23:00Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:58Caption #829
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:54Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:49Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:46Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:43Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:41Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:40Caption #43
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:38Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:37Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:34Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:33Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:30Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:29Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:25Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:23Caption #773
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:21Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:19Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:17Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:15Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:09Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:08Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:07Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:05Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:04Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker18:22:01Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:58Caption #954
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:56Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:53Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:49Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:47Caption #288
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:46Caption #630
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:45Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:44Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:42Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:41Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:39Caption #945
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:38Caption #363
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:37Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:36Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:35Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:33Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:32Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:29Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:25Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:22Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:20Caption #532
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:19Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:15Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:13Caption #557
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:10Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:09Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:07Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:06Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:05Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:03Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:02Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker18:21:01Caption #922
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:59Caption #649
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:58Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:57Caption #461
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:55Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:53Caption #107
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:51Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:50Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:49Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:47Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:46Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:41Caption #634
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:39Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:37Caption #99
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:36Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:35Caption #688
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:34Caption #840
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:33Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:30Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:28Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:27Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:25Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:23Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:22Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:20Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:18Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:17Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:13Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:10Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:09Caption #281
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:08Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:05Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker18:20:02Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:58Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:56Caption #215
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:54Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:50Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:49Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:46Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:45Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:44Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:43Caption #437
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:42Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:41Caption #667
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:37Caption #632
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:34Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:33Caption #288
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:31Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:30Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:29Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:28Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:27Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:26Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:25Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:23Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:21Caption #503
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:19Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:18Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:16Caption #060
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:14Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:13Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:11Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:10Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:09Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:06Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:03Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:02Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker18:19:01Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:57Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:53Caption #748
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:52Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:50Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:49Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:48Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:45Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:43Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:41Caption #289
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:40Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:37Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:35Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:34Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:33Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:32Caption #849
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:31Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:29Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:28Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:26Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:25Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:23Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:22Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:21Caption #586
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:20Caption #490
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:19Caption #388
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:17Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:16Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:13Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:12Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:09Caption #770
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:08Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:05Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:03Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker18:18:01Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:58Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:57Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:55Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:53Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:52Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:51Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:49Caption #643
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:46Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:45Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:42Caption #902
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:41Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:40Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:39Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:37Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:36Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:34Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:33Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:32Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:31Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:30Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:29Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:28Caption #783
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:27Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:25Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:24Caption #787
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:21Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:17Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:14Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:13Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:12Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:10Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:09Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:08Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:07Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:06Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:05Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:04Caption #588
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:03Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:01Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker18:17:00Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:58Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:57Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:56Caption #486
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:55Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:54Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:53Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:52Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:51Caption #873
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:50Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:49Caption #493
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:48Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:45Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:43Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:42Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:41Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:37Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:34Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:33Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:32Caption #-8
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:29Caption #534
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:25Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:24Caption #444
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:23Caption #927
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:22Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:21Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:20Caption #895
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:18Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:17Caption #783
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:15Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:13Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:12Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:11Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:10Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:09Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:08Caption #50
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:07Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:06Caption #537
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:05Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:03Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:01Caption #887
Mr. NonameLurker18:16:00Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:59Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:58Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:57Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:55Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:53Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:52Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:49Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:46Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:45Caption #783
Mr. NonameLurker18:15:41Caption #179

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.


There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post