[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 12/03/2003 by Mort
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Damn! My wife was so mad at me last night.

She found my Maternal Manatee Mammilla DVD collection,

and my subscription to Broads with Balls.


The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker19:25:25Scrawled on the board
apple juice is a verbCaption Monkie18:02:57Alternatiphized #23
Mr. NonameLurker23:59:00drooled over #3
Mr. NonameLurker23:55:29drooled over #32
Mr. NonameLurker23:47:09drooled over #7

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I ran out of ideas, so I went for crass humour. Of course these fetishes probably exist out there...

There are 18 messages for this day.
<Lauren> Mort, crass humor is always good and, in this case, extremely good. I am anxious to see if anyone can top it.
<Lauren> Mort, crass humor is always good and, in this case, extremely good. I am anxious to see if anyone can top it.
<guyPaulo> Lauren was so excited she said it twice. HeHe. Why don't we get as dirty as possible today, just for kicks.
<yoyology> Being original and tasteless will be a challenge here. Once you get past the bestiality and "pussy" jokes, you gotta get really esoteric.
<ElvisThePelvis> I would like to apologize for all of my comments today and any offense they may have caused. I would also like to apologize the PETA, The Fat Chick Association of America, NAMBLA, the NFL, Furrys are People Too, the Catholic Church and finally to my wonderful children and beautiful wife who have stood by me despite my 10 years of drug abuse and 7 arrests (no convictions).
<yoyology> You've been wasted for 10 years, arrested 7 times, and still managed to have 17 affairs and father 3 bastards? Damn, that's some stamina!
<Lauren> yoyo, I believe Elvis's name says it all...
<ElvisThePelvis> Thank you, thank you very much.
<yoyology> Uh-huh-huh.
<Mort> Well what did we learn from today?
Lauren likes read all things crass.
Elvis only has smut on his mind and in his captions.
guyPaulo kinda reminds me of Beavis.
Yoyo is Esoteric Presley.
<yoyology> Hey, I studiously avoided making a reference to Barbara Manatee from the Veggietales. Give me some credit.
<ElvisThePelvis> Oh, Oh, I learned how to spell Ecumenical.
<yoyology> Now you just need to work on "gender", "intensely", "breastfeeding" and "altarboy". :-)
<ElvisThePelvis> yeah, well, my web browser needs a spellchecker. It is tough to post without getting caught here in the jail library.
<MLimburg> Mort, another bs idea :) How about a link on the images to the original yahoo story. That way, we can quickly check on the story behind the pic.
<yoyology> You know, that's not bad. I usually try to do that, but this time it was harder, because the football story had already scrolled off the list.
<me> you guys like to wank on grama cunt
<me> and grampa

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