[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 03/25/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Master Dinkie, bastard son of Miss Twinkles, detested the creepy movements of flightless birds.

He sent forth Baroness "Hate Skate" Cohen to do his dirty work.

The penguins didn't have a chance.
(Reuters)
(AFP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 218 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker17:43:00Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:59Caption #42
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:58Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:57Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:56Caption #627
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:55Caption #669
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:54Caption #-38
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:53Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:52Caption #-27
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:51Caption #639
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:50Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:49Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:47Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:46Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:45Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:44Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:43Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:42Caption #-45
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:41Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:40Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:39Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:35Caption #606
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:34Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:33Caption #159
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:32Caption #-17
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:31Caption #639
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:30Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:29Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:28Caption #-36
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:26Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:25Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:24Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:23Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:22Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:21Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:19Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:17Caption #-9
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:15Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:14Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:13Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:12Caption #437
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:11Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:10Caption #754
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:09Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:08Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:07Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:06Caption #471
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:05Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:04Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:03Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:02Caption #673
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:01Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker17:42:00Caption #186
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:59Caption #199
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:58Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:57Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:56Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:55Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:54Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:53Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:51Caption #355
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:50Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:48Caption #-24
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:47Caption #-43
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:46Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:45Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:44Caption #289
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:43Caption #-42
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:42Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:41Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:40Caption #-27
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:39Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:38Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:37Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:36Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:32Caption #887
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:31Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:30Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:29Caption #539
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:28Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:27Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:26Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:25Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:24Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:23Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:22Caption #377
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:21Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:18Caption #654
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:17Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:16Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:15Caption #727
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:14Caption #139
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:13Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:12Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:11Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:10Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:09Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:08Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:07Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:06Caption #773
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:05Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:04Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:03Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:02Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:01Caption #-7
Mr. NonameLurker17:41:00Caption #363
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:59Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:58Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:57Caption #-42
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:56Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:55Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:54Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:53Caption #761
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:52Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:51Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:50Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:49Caption #-9
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:48Caption #-18
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:47Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:46Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:45Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:44Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:43Caption #521
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:42Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:41Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:40Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:39Caption #-68
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:38Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:37Caption #984
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:36Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:35Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:34Caption #331
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:33Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:32Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:31Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:30Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:29Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:28Caption #-43
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:27Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:26Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:25Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:24Caption #385
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:23Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:22Caption #455
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:21Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:20Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:19Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:18Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:17Caption #710
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:16Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:15Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:14Caption #-48
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:13Caption #966
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:12Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:11Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:10Caption #-33
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:09Caption #-66
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:08Caption #316
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:07Caption #-45
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:06Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:05Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:04Caption #250
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:03Caption #758
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:02Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:01Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker17:40:00Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:59Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:58Caption #710
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:57Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:56Caption #657
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:55Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:54Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:53Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:52Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:51Caption #872
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:50Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:49Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:48Caption #237
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:47Caption #632
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:46Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:45Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:44Caption #31
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:43Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:42Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:41Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:40Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:39Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:38Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:37Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:36Caption #863
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:35Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:34Caption #812
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:32Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:31Caption #343
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:30Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:29Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:28Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:27Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:26Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:25Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:24Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:23Caption #309
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:22Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:21Caption #374
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:20Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:19Caption #-38
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:18Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:17Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:16Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:15Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:14Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:13Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:12Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:11Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:10Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:09Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:08Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker17:39:07Caption #465

Board [Post Message]

Absolute truths, circa 1997


The number of people that die of potato related deaths in Russia per year is higher than the population of Denmark.

The average internet user has 68% less chance of being in a relationship than other people who do not use the internet.

Most people believe that Tuesday is the longest day of the week and Wednesday is the most common day for concieving children.

The spatula was origianlly created as a highly useful torture device in medieval Belgium.

The Oroca Indians of South America are currently the most accomplished human taxidermist.

The common domestic ferret was the first cavity searching device developed by the spanish inquisition.

The average full grown everglades Alligator can consume up to 7 humans in one meal.

Gorillas have enormous nostrils because of large fingers.

The average watch is 18 minutes slow.

The number of people run over by buses in Britain last year is equal to the number of people killed by telephones in Mexico.

Shakespeare was a mutton cook while writing his most famous plays.

Buckingham palace was built on the site of a hamster breeding farm.

The average man breathes 108 times during sex, the average woman breathes 68 times.

The average internet user spends 42% of the time waiting while online.

somewhere.com is the most asked for internet domain.

Norwegian Females are on average 6 inches taller than the average male.

The deep blue Puffer fish can suck harder than the average vacuume cleaner.

The average time to eating is 2 hours and 15 minutes, ie too long.

The last time a human was killed by a penguin was in 1978, his name was Norman "skip" Kriugs.

94% of female Austrians have never seen a men's urinal.

The Pope is required by medieval church canon law to shave his body hair once a year.

It is has been scientifically proved that hair loss is linked to snoring.


There are 18 messages for this day.
<jordie3> No way.
<Popeshaver> I am sorry but the penultimate rumor is true. So sadly true...*sobs*
<Lauren> Tuesday IS the longest day of the week and 42% hourglassing seems about right to me for internet use (but I still use a dial-up connection). Last night I had the opportunity to monitor my own breathing and that of my partner and can tell you that #13 has to be wrong. Although I lost count somewhere around 2,000, I was definitely ahead at that point. The rest seem pretty unrealistic, and I wouldn't have believed them if Popeshaver hadn't confirmed the next to last.
<guyPaulo> Here's an interesting tidbit. The average respitory rate for adults is 12-18 breaths per minute. If you assume twice that rate for sex (24-36, average is 30), then 108/30= 3 minutes 36 seconds is the average time for the average man to have sex.
<Hysterical Woman> 86% percent of people blindly believe in any stats, no matter what the source.
<Jellyloo> 'Stinkopated' is not a word but I think it should be. 96% of doctors agree.
<Mort> What would it mean Jellyloo dear?
<Kumiho> Funny I was sure this photo would make it on today's three pictures.
...story.news.yahoo.com...
I mean, after bottles of 40oz being passed around, it seemed natural.
Or are you forbiding any more monkey pix, Mort?
<Jellyloo> Stinkopated: To suffer a short loss of consciousness due to bad smells?
<guyPaulo> Hopefully, that monkie pic will be saved for the next "Meta Day."
<Mort> I actually can't smell right now, damn allergies.

I didn't even see the monkie pic when I chose the images last night. I hope it does stay for meta day.

<mypalmike> You can smell, and you do.
<Starbug> Over one's lifetime, the average person will eat eight spiders while sleeping.
<guyPaulo> It's saterday night and I'm lit! WHOOOOHH!!!
<Carol> It's Sunday morning, how ya doing now? Did you enjoy the spiders?
Also: mypalmike is giving me bratty-brother flashbacks.
<Mort> I was rudely woken up by the sheriffs' department charity fund asking for donations. My religious beliefs forbid me to give money to anyone who wakes me up while other people are in church.
I mean if you can't enjoy sleeping in on Sunday while others are sitting uncomfortably getting sermon'D to, then where's the fun in being atheist?
<obtuse> 
<obtuse> Er. I was going to scold guy for doing the web-equivalent of drunk-dialing, but I'm probably in much the same state right now. Hence the double post. Peace out, granola dome.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post