[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 03/25/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Master Dinkie, bastard son of Miss Twinkles, detested the creepy movements of flightless birds.

He sent forth Baroness "Hate Skate" Cohen to do his dirty work.

The penguins didn't have a chance.
(Reuters)
(AFP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 117 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:40Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:39Caption #-50
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:38Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:37Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:36Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:35Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:34Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:33Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:31Caption #677
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:30Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:29Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:28Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:27Caption #930
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:26Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:25Caption #942
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:24Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:23Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:22Caption #818
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:21Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:20Caption #515
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:16Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:15Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:14Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:13Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:12Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:11Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:10Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:09Caption #282
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:07Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:06Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:04Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:03Caption #914
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:01Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker03:40:00Caption #848
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:59Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:58Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:57Caption #724
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:56Caption #786
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:55Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:54Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:53Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:52Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:48Caption #786
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:47Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:46Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:44Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:42Caption #688
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:41Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:39Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:38Caption #685
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:38Caption #555
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:36Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:35Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:33Caption #627
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:32Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:31Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:30Caption #812
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:29Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:26Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:25Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:24Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:23Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:20Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:19Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:18Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:15Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:14Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:13Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:11Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:10Caption #469
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:09Caption #960
Mr. NonameLurker03:39:00Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:59Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:58Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:54Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:53Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:46Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:45Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:44Caption #84
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:40Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:37Caption #252
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:36Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:26Caption #606
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:25Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:24Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:23Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:22Caption #551
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:21Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:16Caption #758
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:12Caption #654
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:06Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:04Caption #794
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:03Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:02Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:01Caption #913
Mr. NonameLurker03:38:00Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:59Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:58Caption #-21
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:57Caption #858
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:56Caption #403
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:50Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:49Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:48Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:47Caption #974
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:46Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:45Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:44Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:43Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:42Caption #868
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:41Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:40Caption #710
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:39Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:38Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:37Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:36Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:33Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker03:37:32Caption #367

Board [Post Message]

Absolute truths, circa 1997


The number of people that die of potato related deaths in Russia per year is higher than the population of Denmark.

The average internet user has 68% less chance of being in a relationship than other people who do not use the internet.

Most people believe that Tuesday is the longest day of the week and Wednesday is the most common day for concieving children.

The spatula was origianlly created as a highly useful torture device in medieval Belgium.

The Oroca Indians of South America are currently the most accomplished human taxidermist.

The common domestic ferret was the first cavity searching device developed by the spanish inquisition.

The average full grown everglades Alligator can consume up to 7 humans in one meal.

Gorillas have enormous nostrils because of large fingers.

The average watch is 18 minutes slow.

The number of people run over by buses in Britain last year is equal to the number of people killed by telephones in Mexico.

Shakespeare was a mutton cook while writing his most famous plays.

Buckingham palace was built on the site of a hamster breeding farm.

The average man breathes 108 times during sex, the average woman breathes 68 times.

The average internet user spends 42% of the time waiting while online.

somewhere.com is the most asked for internet domain.

Norwegian Females are on average 6 inches taller than the average male.

The deep blue Puffer fish can suck harder than the average vacuume cleaner.

The average time to eating is 2 hours and 15 minutes, ie too long.

The last time a human was killed by a penguin was in 1978, his name was Norman "skip" Kriugs.

94% of female Austrians have never seen a men's urinal.

The Pope is required by medieval church canon law to shave his body hair once a year.

It is has been scientifically proved that hair loss is linked to snoring.


There are 18 messages for this day.
<jordie3> No way.
<Popeshaver> I am sorry but the penultimate rumor is true. So sadly true...*sobs*
<Lauren> Tuesday IS the longest day of the week and 42% hourglassing seems about right to me for internet use (but I still use a dial-up connection). Last night I had the opportunity to monitor my own breathing and that of my partner and can tell you that #13 has to be wrong. Although I lost count somewhere around 2,000, I was definitely ahead at that point. The rest seem pretty unrealistic, and I wouldn't have believed them if Popeshaver hadn't confirmed the next to last.
<guyPaulo> Here's an interesting tidbit. The average respitory rate for adults is 12-18 breaths per minute. If you assume twice that rate for sex (24-36, average is 30), then 108/30= 3 minutes 36 seconds is the average time for the average man to have sex.
<Hysterical Woman> 86% percent of people blindly believe in any stats, no matter what the source.
<Jellyloo> 'Stinkopated' is not a word but I think it should be. 96% of doctors agree.
<Mort> What would it mean Jellyloo dear?
<Kumiho> Funny I was sure this photo would make it on today's three pictures.
...story.news.yahoo.com...
I mean, after bottles of 40oz being passed around, it seemed natural.
Or are you forbiding any more monkey pix, Mort?
<Jellyloo> Stinkopated: To suffer a short loss of consciousness due to bad smells?
<guyPaulo> Hopefully, that monkie pic will be saved for the next "Meta Day."
<Mort> I actually can't smell right now, damn allergies.

I didn't even see the monkie pic when I chose the images last night. I hope it does stay for meta day.

<mypalmike> You can smell, and you do.
<Starbug> Over one's lifetime, the average person will eat eight spiders while sleeping.
<guyPaulo> It's saterday night and I'm lit! WHOOOOHH!!!
<Carol> It's Sunday morning, how ya doing now? Did you enjoy the spiders?
Also: mypalmike is giving me bratty-brother flashbacks.
<Mort> I was rudely woken up by the sheriffs' department charity fund asking for donations. My religious beliefs forbid me to give money to anyone who wakes me up while other people are in church.
I mean if you can't enjoy sleeping in on Sunday while others are sitting uncomfortably getting sermon'D to, then where's the fun in being atheist?
<obtuse> 
<obtuse> Er. I was going to scold guy for doing the web-equivalent of drunk-dialing, but I'm probably in much the same state right now. Hence the double post. Peace out, granola dome.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post