[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)
Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 377 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:14Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:13Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:12Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:11Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:10Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:09Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:08Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:03Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:02Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:01Caption #323
Mr. NonameLurker16:53:00Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:59Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:58Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:57Caption #775
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:56Caption #775
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:55Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:53Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:51Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:49Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:47Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:45Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:43Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:42Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:41Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:40Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:39Caption #841
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:38Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:37Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:36Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:34Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:32Caption #98
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:30Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:27Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:26Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:25Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:24Caption #97
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:24Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:22Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:21Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:20Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:19Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:18Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:16Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:13Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:11Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:10Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:08Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:07Caption #822
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:06Caption #517
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:05Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:04Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:03Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:02Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:01Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:00Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:59Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:58Caption #946
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:57Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:56Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:55Caption #-14
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:54Caption #-11
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:53Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:52Caption #639
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:50Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:48Caption #500
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:47Caption #829
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:46Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:42Caption #50
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:38Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:35Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:34Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:30Caption #794
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:25Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:23Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:22Caption #672
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:21Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:18Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:17Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:16Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:15Caption #411
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:14Caption #899
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:13Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:12Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:11Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:10Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:09Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:08Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:07Caption #957
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:06Caption #822
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:05Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:04Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:03Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:02Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:01Caption #688
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:00Caption #606
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:59Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:58Caption #323
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:57Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:56Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:55Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:54Caption #662
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:52Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:51Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:50Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:47Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:45Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:44Caption #545
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:41Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:40Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:39Caption #42
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:38Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:37Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:36Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:35Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:34Caption #879
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:33Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:32Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:31Caption #471
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:29Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:25Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:23Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:22Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:19Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:18Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:16Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:15Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:13Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:11Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:10Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:09Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:08Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:07Caption #854
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:06Caption #767
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:05Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:04Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:03Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:58Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:56Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:53Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:52Caption #293
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:50Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:49Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:48Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:47Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:46Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:45Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:44Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:43Caption #417
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:41Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:40Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:39Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:38Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:37Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:36Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:35Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:34Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:30Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:29Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:27Caption #449
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:25Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:23Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:22Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:19Caption #925
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:15Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:14Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:13Caption #461
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:12Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:11Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:10Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:09Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:08Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:06Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:04Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:03Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:02Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:01Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:00Caption #289
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:58Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:54Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:53Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:52Caption #199
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:51Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:50Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:49Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:48Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:47Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:46Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:45Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:43Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:42Caption #655
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:39Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:37Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:33Caption #-42
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:30Caption #627
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:29Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:28Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:27Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:26Caption #385
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:25Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:24Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:23Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:22Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:18Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:17Caption #794
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:16Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:15Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:14Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:13Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:12Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:11Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:09Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:07Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:05Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:03Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:01Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:59Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:58Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:57Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:53Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:50Caption #372
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:49Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:47Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:46Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:43Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:42Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:39Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:38Caption #487
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:36Caption #767
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:35Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:34Caption #627
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:33Caption #352
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:31Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:26Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:23Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:22Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:21Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:20Caption #-7
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:19Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:15Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:13Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:12Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:11Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:10Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:08Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:02Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:01Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:00Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:59Caption #42
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:58Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:57Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:56Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:54Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:52Caption #652
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:51Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:47Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:46Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:45Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:44Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:43Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:42Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:41Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:36Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:34Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:33Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:31Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:30Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:28Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:26Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:25Caption #329
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:23Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:22Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:21Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:20Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:19Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:18Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:17Caption #873
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:14Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:13Caption #822
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:12Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:10Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:09Caption #-4
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:08Caption #-35
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:07Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:05Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:03Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:02Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:01Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:00Caption #583
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:58Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:57Caption #877
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:52Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:51Caption #719
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:49Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:47Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:45Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:44Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:42Caption #455
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:41Caption #338
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:40Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:38Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:36Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:34Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:32Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:29Caption #243
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:27Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:25Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:22Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:21Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:19Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:18Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:15Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:14Caption #138
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:10Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:09Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:08Caption #352
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:07Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:06Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:05Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:02Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:01Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:59Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:58Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:55Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:54Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:51Caption #367
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:49Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:47Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:46Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:45Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:43Caption #215
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:42Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:41Caption #724
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:38Caption #98
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:37Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:35Caption #320
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:34Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:31Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:30Caption #108
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:27Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:25Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:23Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:22Caption #229
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:21Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:19Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:17Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:14Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:13Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:12Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:10Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:09Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:07Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:05Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:04Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:02Caption #401
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:01Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:00Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:59Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:56Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:55Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:52Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:50Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:47Caption #455
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:43Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:41Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:40Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:38Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:37Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:36Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:34Caption #503
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:29Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:28Caption #911
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:26Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:22Caption #770
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:21Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:18Caption #271
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:16Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:15Caption #748

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.

There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post