[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)
Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 365 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:18Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:17Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:16Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:15Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:14Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:13Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:12Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:11Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:10Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:09Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:07Caption #-69
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:05Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker21:31:01Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:56Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:55Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:51Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:48Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:47Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:45Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:43Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:42Caption #97
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:37Caption #678
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:32Caption #-45
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:29Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:27Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:26Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:24Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:23Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:20Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:18Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:17Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:16Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:15Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:12Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:09Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:05Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker21:30:02Caption #193
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:58Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:57Caption #534
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:54Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:49Caption #550
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:45Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:43Caption #874
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:41Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:39Caption #771
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:38Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:37Caption #858
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:35Caption #745
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:33Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:32Caption #931
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:31Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:29Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:28Caption #291
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:23Caption #-33
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:22Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:21Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:20Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:18Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:17Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:13Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:12Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:11Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:10Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:07Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:06Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:05Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:04Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:02Caption #243
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:01Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker21:29:00Caption #910
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:58Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:56Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:55Caption #276
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:51Caption #405
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:50Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:48Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:46Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:45Caption #955
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:43Caption #515
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:42Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:41Caption #917
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:40Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:37Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:35Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:34Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:32Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:30Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:29Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:25Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:24Caption #864
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:22Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:21Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:19Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:17Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:16Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:15Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:13Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:12Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:11Caption #871
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:10Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:09Caption #323
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:04Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker21:28:00Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:58Caption #764
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:56Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:55Caption #818
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:54Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:53Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:52Caption #461
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:51Caption #901
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:49Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:48Caption #785
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:47Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:44Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:41Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:40Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:39Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:38Caption #582
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:36Caption #673
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:35Caption #562
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:33Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:31Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:30Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:28Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:27Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:22Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:21Caption #889
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:19Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:18Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:17Caption #928
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:16Caption #853
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:15Caption #316
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:14Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:13Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:11Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:09Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:08Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:07Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:05Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:02Caption #792
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:01Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker21:27:00Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:58Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:57Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:56Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:55Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:54Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:53Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:52Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:51Caption #322
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:50Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:49Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:48Caption #754
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:47Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:46Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:45Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:44Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:42Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:41Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:40Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:38Caption #881
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:37Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:35Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:34Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:29Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:28Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:27Caption #920
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:26Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:25Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:24Caption #368
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:23Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:22Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:21Caption #275
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:20Caption #821
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:19Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:18Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:17Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:16Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:15Caption #-4
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:14Caption #403
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:13Caption #877
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:12Caption #773
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:11Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:10Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:09Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:08Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:07Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:06Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:05Caption #274
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:04Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:03Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:02Caption #320
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:01Caption #33
Mr. NonameLurker21:26:00Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:59Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:58Caption #301
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:57Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:56Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:55Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:54Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:53Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:52Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:51Caption #927
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:50Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:49Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:48Caption #454
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:47Caption #444
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:46Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:45Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:44Caption #863
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:43Caption #272
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:42Caption #737
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:41Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:40Caption #930
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:39Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:38Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:37Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:36Caption #761
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:35Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:33Caption #401
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:31Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:29Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:28Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:27Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:25Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:24Caption #276
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:22Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:21Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:17Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:15Caption #503
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:14Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:13Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:11Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:09Caption #792
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:08Caption #656
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:06Caption #824
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:05Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:04Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:03Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:02Caption #411
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:01Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker21:25:00Caption #51
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:59Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:58Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:57Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:56Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:55Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:54Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:53Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:52Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:51Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:50Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:49Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:48Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:47Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:46Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:45Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:44Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:43Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:42Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:41Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:40Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:39Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:38Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:37Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:36Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:34Caption #-92
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:33Caption #286
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:31Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:30Caption #256
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:29Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:28Caption #727
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:27Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:25Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:23Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:19Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:18Caption #710
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:16Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:14Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:13Caption #-67
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:12Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:11Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:09Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:07Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:05Caption #550
Mr. NonameLurker21:24:00Caption #910
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:53Caption #761
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:52Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:51Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:50Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:49Caption #677
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:48Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:47Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:46Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:45Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:44Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:43Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:42Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:41Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:40Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:39Caption #-5
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:38Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:37Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:36Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:35Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:34Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:33Caption #820
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:31Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:30Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:29Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:28Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:27Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:25Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:24Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:22Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:20Caption #765
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:18Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:17Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:16Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:13Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:10Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:09Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:08Caption #301
Mr. NonameLurker21:23:05Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:59Caption #539
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:54Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:52Caption #630
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:48Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:45Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:37Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:36Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:35Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:34Caption #692
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:27Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:24Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:21Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:19Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:17Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:16Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:15Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:13Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:12Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:10Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:08Caption #678
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:07Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:06Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:05Caption #761
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:02Caption #403
Mr. NonameLurker21:22:00Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:57Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:56Caption #281
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:54Caption #435
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:53Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:52Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:47Caption #428
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:44Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:43Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:40Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:39Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:36Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:32Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:31Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:24Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:23Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker21:21:18Caption #858

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.

There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post