[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)
Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 334 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:16Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:15Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:14Caption #532
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:13Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:09Caption #955
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:05Caption #544
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:01Caption #863
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:59Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:58Caption #659
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:57Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:55Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:53Caption #754
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:52Caption #327
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:45Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:43Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:42Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:41Caption #377
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:40Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:39Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:37Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:35Caption #353
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:33Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:29Caption #878
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:27Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:25Caption #825
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:21Caption #417
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:17Caption #331
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:16Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:15Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:13Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:10Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:09Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:06Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:05Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:01Caption #583
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:00Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:59Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:58Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:57Caption #955
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:56Caption #63
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:55Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:54Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:50Caption #940
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:45Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:43Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:42Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:37Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:36Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:33Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:30Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:27Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:25Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:24Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:21Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:19Caption #475
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:18Caption #-27
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:17Caption #919
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:15Caption #524
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:14Caption #256
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:11Caption #812
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:09Caption #766
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:07Caption #-88
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:05Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:03Caption #870
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:02Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:01Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:00Caption #850
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:58Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:57Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:53Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:52Caption #980
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:49Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:48Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:47Caption #385
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:46Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:45Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:44Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:41Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:40Caption #948
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:37Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:34Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:33Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:32Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:30Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:29Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:28Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:27Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:26Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:21Caption #428
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:19Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:18Caption #656
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:16Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:14Caption #912
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:12Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:10Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:07Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:05Caption #193
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:04Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:03Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:56Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:54Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:53Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:50Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:49Caption #632
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:47Caption #732
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:45Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:43Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:42Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:39Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:38Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:37Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:35Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:33Caption #524
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:32Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:30Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:29Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:28Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:26Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:25Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:24Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:23Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:22Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:21Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:19Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:17Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:14Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:11Caption #609
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:09Caption #431
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:08Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:06Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:05Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:03Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:02Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:00Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:59Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:57Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:56Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:55Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:54Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:53Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:52Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:51Caption #912
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:50Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:49Caption #662
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:46Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:45Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:44Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:43Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:41Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:38Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:37Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:36Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:34Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:33Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:31Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:29Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:28Caption #368
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:27Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:26Caption #67
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:24Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:21Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:20Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:18Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:17Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:14Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:11Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:05Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:04Caption #272
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:02Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker13:48:00Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:58Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:57Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:56Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:53Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:50Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:49Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:48Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:47Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:46Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:42Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:40Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:37Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:34Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:33Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:29Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:28Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:26Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:25Caption #821
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:21Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:20Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:19Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:15Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:14Caption #792
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:11Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:10Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:09Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:08Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:07Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:05Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:03Caption #765
Mr. NonameLurker13:47:01Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:59Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:57Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:55Caption #685
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:54Caption #889
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:53Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:51Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:50Caption #872
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:49Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:45Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:42Caption #320
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:37Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:34Caption #108
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:33Caption #733
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:30Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:28Caption #846
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:27Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:26Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:25Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:21Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:17Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:13Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:09Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:08Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:06Caption #242
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:05Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:04Caption #867
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:03Caption #540
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:02Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:01Caption #786
Mr. NonameLurker13:46:00Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:59Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:58Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:55Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:54Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:52Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:50Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:49Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:47Caption #977
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:46Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:45Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:42Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:41Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:37Caption #803
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:36Caption #872
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:34Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:33Caption #725
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:31Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:30Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:29Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:28Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:26Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:24Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:22Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:19Caption #288
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:18Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:17Caption #505
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:15Caption #469
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:14Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:12Caption #224
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:10Caption #391
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:05Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:04Caption #748
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:03Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:01Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker13:45:00Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:59Caption #-42
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:58Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:57Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:55Caption #219
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:54Caption #657
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:53Caption #229
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:50Caption #415
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:49Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:48Caption #941
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:47Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:45Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:43Caption #609
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:42Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:41Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:40Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:37Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:35Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:33Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:30Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:28Caption #343
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:25Caption #571
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:23Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:19Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:18Caption #405
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:17Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:16Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:15Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:13Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:10Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:09Caption #139
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:07Caption #96
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:06Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:01Caption #858
Mr. NonameLurker13:44:00Caption #537
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:59Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:58Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:57Caption #967
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:56Caption #965
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:55Caption #902
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:54Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:54Caption #471
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:51Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:50Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:49Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:47Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:46Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:45Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:43Caption #803
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:42Caption #853
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:41Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:39Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:37Caption #368
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:36Caption #528
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:33Caption #775
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:32Caption #96
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:31Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:30Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:29Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:28Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:27Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:26Caption #193
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:25Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:22Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:21Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:19Caption #993
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:18Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker13:43:16Caption #445

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.

There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post