Most Emailed Photos

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004

by Mort

<-- First

Choose an alternative caption: >

Last -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"

(AFP)

(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.

History

These 5 things happened most recently.

Mr. Noname Lurker 15:05:46 drooled over #54

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:46 drooled over #666

Mr. Noname Lurker 13:52:24 drooled over #76

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:51:51 drooled over #102

Mr. Noname Lurker 09:22:14 drooled over #555

Current Users

There have been 412 users in the last 10 minutes.

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:55 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:54 Caption #623

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:53 Caption #161

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:52 Caption #372

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:51 Caption #40

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:49 Caption #756

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:48 Caption #530

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:45 Caption #202

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:44 Caption #592

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:43 Caption #600

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:42 Caption #197

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:40 Caption #391

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:39 Caption #535

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:38 Caption #325

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:37 Caption #371

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:35 Caption #512

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:34 Caption #325

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:30 Caption #304

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:29 Caption #43

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:28 Caption #730

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:27 Caption #212

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:26 Caption #633

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:25 Caption #782

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:24 Caption #461

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:23 Caption #691

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:21 Caption #833

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:19 Caption #356

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:16 Caption #543

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:14 Caption #571

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:12 Caption #453

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:09 Caption #780

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:08 Caption #317

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:05 Caption #743

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:04 Caption #759

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:13:01 Caption #733

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:59 Caption #315

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:58 Caption #900

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:57 Caption #333

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:56 Caption #223

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:53 Caption #742

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:51 Caption #139

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:49 Caption #897

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:48 Caption #676

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:44 Caption #655

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:40 Caption #164

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:39 Caption #192

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:38 Caption #-7

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:36 Caption #489

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:32 Caption #940

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:31 Caption #8

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:29 Caption #438

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:26 Caption #4

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:24 Caption #460

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:22 Caption #407

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:20 Caption #127

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:19 Caption #300

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:17 Caption #794

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:16 Caption #253

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:13 Caption #811

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:12 Caption #90

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:11 Caption #64

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:10 Caption #838

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:08 Caption #108

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:07 Caption #533

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:06 Caption #479

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:05 Caption #687

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:04 Caption #477

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:02 Caption #982

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:01 Caption #512

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:12:00 Caption #121

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:59 Caption #312

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:57 Caption #65

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:56 Caption #737

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:54 Caption #350

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:53 Caption #922

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:52 Caption #679

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:49 Caption #95

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:48 Caption #923

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:44 Caption #573

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:43 Caption #746

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:42 Caption #330

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:41 Caption #324

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:39 Caption #155

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:38 Caption #538

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:37 Caption #720

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:35 Caption #780

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:32 Caption #0

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:30 Caption #244

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:29 Caption #235

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:28 Caption #125

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:27 Caption #487

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:26 Caption #506

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:24 Caption #922

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:23 Caption #797

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:22 Caption #15

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:21 Caption #80

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:20 Caption #44

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:18 Caption #74

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:17 Caption #840

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:15 Caption #739

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:14 Caption #16

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:13 Caption #693

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:12 Caption #431

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:11 Caption #641

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:09 Caption #198

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:08 Caption #84

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:07 Caption #463

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:06 Caption #46

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:03 Caption #405

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:02 Caption #159

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:01 Caption #222

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:11:00 Caption #929

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:59 Caption #610

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:58 Caption #103

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:57 Caption #240

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:55 Caption #580

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:53 Caption #402

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:52 Caption #31

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:51 Caption #508

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:50 Caption #295

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:46 Caption #210

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:44 Caption #115

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:42 Caption #585

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:41 Caption #819

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:40 Caption #129

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:38 Caption #285

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:37 Caption #-53

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:36 Caption #634

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:33 Caption #455

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:31 Caption #203

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:30 Caption #203

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:29 Caption #361

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:27 Caption #342

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:26 Caption #135

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:25 Caption #115

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:24 Caption #139

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:22 Caption #787

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:21 Caption #675

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:20 Caption #539

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:18 Caption #945

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:17 Caption #395

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:16 Caption #409

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:15 Caption #474

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:14 Caption #223

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:13 Caption #13

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:12 Caption #637

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:11 Caption #139

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:10 Caption #166

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:09 Caption #188

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:08 Caption #383

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:04 Caption #522

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:03 Caption #152

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:02 Caption #340

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:01 Caption #475

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:10:00 Caption #532

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:59 Caption #718

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:58 Caption #582

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:56 Caption #504

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:55 Caption #4

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:54 Caption #231

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:53 Caption #340

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:51 Caption #439

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:50 Caption #216

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:49 Caption #498

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:48 Caption #746

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:47 Caption #448

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:46 Caption #795

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:45 Caption #763

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:44 Caption #653

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:42 Caption #606

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:41 Caption #694

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:40 Caption #665

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:39 Caption #345

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:37 Caption #432

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:36 Caption #301

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:32 Caption #407

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:31 Caption #877

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:30 Caption #-26

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:29 Caption #196

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:28 Caption #644

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:27 Caption #810

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:26 Caption #798

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:25 Caption #574

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:24 Caption #755

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:22 Caption #638

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:20 Caption #62

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:19 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:18 Caption #701

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:17 Caption #-23

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:16 Caption #882

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:15 Caption #574

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:14 Caption #848

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:13 Caption #344

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:12 Caption #142

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:11 Caption #173

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:10 Caption #361

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:09 Caption #536

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:08 Caption #605

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:06 Caption #925

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:05 Caption #772

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:04 Caption #576

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:03 Caption #395

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:02 Caption #432

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:09:00 Caption #716

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:59 Caption #557

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:57 Caption #701

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:56 Caption #78

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:55 Caption #112

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:53 Caption #37

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:52 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:51 Caption #427

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:50 Caption #875

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:49 Caption #916

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:48 Caption #434

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:47 Caption #540

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:46 Caption #50

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:45 Caption #197

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:44 Caption #320

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:44 Caption #910

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:41 Caption #393

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:37 Caption #306

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:36 Caption #744

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:34 Caption #575

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:33 Caption #721

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:29 Caption #220

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:28 Caption #673

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:26 Caption #35

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:24 Caption #552

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:20 Caption #680

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:19 Caption #64

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:18 Caption #418

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:17 Caption #602

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:16 Caption #11

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:15 Caption #87

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:14 Caption #427

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:13 Caption #288

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:12 Caption #913

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:11 Caption #723

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:09 Caption #860

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:08 Caption #737

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:05 Caption #24

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:04 Caption #752

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:02 Caption #749

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:08:00 Caption #814

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:58 Caption #639

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:57 Caption #64

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:56 Caption #499

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:54 Caption #164

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:52 Caption #45

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:51 Caption #626

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:50 Caption #192

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:49 Caption #475

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:48 Caption #699

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:47 Caption #406

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:46 Caption #179

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:44 Caption #890

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:42 Caption #815

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:41 Caption #881

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:39 Caption #206

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:38 Caption #204

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:35 Caption #401

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:34 Caption #256

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:33 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:32 Caption #666

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:31 Caption #719

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:30 Caption #210

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:29 Caption #70

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:28 Caption #44

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:27 Caption #966

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:25 Caption #39

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:23 Caption #468

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:22 Caption #156

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:21 Caption #489

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:20 Caption #732

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:19 Caption #294

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:18 Caption #-37

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:17 Caption #885

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:14 Caption #465

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:13 Caption #745

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:12 Caption #3

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:11 Caption #0

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:10 Caption #508

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:09 Caption #613

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:08 Caption #852

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:05 Caption #199

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:04 Caption #539

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:02 Caption #487

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:07:01 Caption #541

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:58 Caption #800

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:57 Caption #750

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:56 Caption #317

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:55 Caption #138

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:53 Caption #320

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:50 Caption #745

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:48 Caption #627

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:46 Caption #82

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:44 Caption #702

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:42 Caption #473

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:41 Caption #246

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:40 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:39 Caption #116

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:37 Caption #460

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:36 Caption #553

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:34 Caption #538

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:32 Caption #202

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:31 Caption #97

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:30 Caption #524

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:27 Caption #418

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:26 Caption #415

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:24 Caption #12

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:22 Caption #163

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:20 Caption #452

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:18 Caption #524

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:17 Caption #515

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:16 Caption #223

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:13 Caption #549

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:12 Caption #62

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:11 Caption #161

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:09 Caption #553

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:08 Caption #48

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:05 Caption #600

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:03 Caption #629

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:02 Caption #534

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:01 Caption #447

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:06:00 Caption #748

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:58 Caption #183

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:57 Caption #277

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:55 Caption #777

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:54 Caption #228

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:53 Caption #459

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:52 Caption #817

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:50 Caption #319

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:49 Caption #749

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:47 Caption #240

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:46 Caption #689

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:45 Caption #939

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:43 Caption #758

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:41 Caption #13

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:39 Caption #377

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:37 Caption #802

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:36 Caption #214

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:34 Caption #724

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:32 Caption #974

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:31 Caption #249

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:30 Caption #462

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:28 Caption #65

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:27 Caption #861

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:24 Caption #669

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:23 Caption #880

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:22 Caption #545

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:21 Caption #317

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:19 Caption #802

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:18 Caption #462

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:17 Caption #971

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:16 Caption #603

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:14 Caption #257

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:14 Caption #257

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:12 Caption #518

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:10 Caption #912

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:08 Caption #263

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:07 Caption #110

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:04 Caption #340

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:03 Caption #688

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:05:00 Caption #65

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:59 Caption #54

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:58 Caption #641

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:56 Caption #90

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:55 Caption #364

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:53 Caption #31

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:52 Caption #481

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:51 Caption #239

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:50 Caption #151

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:49 Caption #835

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:47 Caption #432

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:46 Caption #406

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:43 Caption #815

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:41 Caption #155

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:40 Caption #814

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:39 Caption #343

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:38 Caption #849

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:37 Caption #172

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:36 Caption #23

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:35 Caption #214

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:34 Caption #47

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:33 Caption #331

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:32 Caption #361

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:31 Caption #-2

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:30 Caption #104

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:29 Caption #482

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:28 Caption #667

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:26 Caption #200

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:24 Caption #343

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:23 Caption #222

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:22 Caption #557

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:21 Caption #713

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:20 Caption #23

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:18 Caption #254

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:17 Caption #123

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:16 Caption #306

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:14 Caption #-15

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:13 Caption #650

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:12 Caption #329

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:10 Caption #771

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:09 Caption #191

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:08 Caption #47

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:06 Caption #310

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:05 Caption #445

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:04 Caption #743

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:04:01 Caption #354

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:03:59 Caption #98

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:03:57 Caption #166

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:03:56 Caption #797

Board

[Post Message]

I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.

There are 16 messages for this day.

<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.

<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.

<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!

<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!

<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.

<Mort> Pretty much.

<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.

<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work

<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.

Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post