[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 07/01/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

I was so nervous, this was the most important question I had ever asked her, so I sweetened her up by giving her a rose.

Then I distracted her by giving her five of the cutest kittens I could possibly find, as I knelt down on one knee.

It was then as she gazed at me with eyes full of love, that I popped the question.

"Can I sleep with your best friend?"
(AFP)
(AP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 374 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:41Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:40Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:39Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:38Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:37Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:36Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:35Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:34Caption #391
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:33Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:32Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:31Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:30Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:29Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:25Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:24Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:23Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:21Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:19Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:17Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:15Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:12Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:10Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:09Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:08Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:07Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:06Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:05Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:04Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:03Caption #-59
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:01Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:00Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:59Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:57Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:56Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:55Caption #933
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:53Caption #351
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:51Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:50Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:49Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:47Caption #666
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:46Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:45Caption #896
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:43Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:42Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:41Caption #281
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:40Caption #405
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:39Caption #652
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:37Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:34Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:33Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:30Caption #-36
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:29Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:25Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:22Caption #674
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:21Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:17Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:16Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:15Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:14Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:13Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:09Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:08Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:06Caption #799
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:03Caption #368
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:01Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:57Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:53Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:52Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:51Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:50Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:49Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:48Caption #799
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:45Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:44Caption #503
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:43Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:42Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:41Caption #649
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:40Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:37Caption #843
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:34Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:33Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:31Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:30Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:29Caption #293
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:26Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:25Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:24Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:22Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:21Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:20Caption #720
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:19Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:17Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:16Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:15Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:14Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:13Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:12Caption #701
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:11Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:10Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:09Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:08Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:05Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:03Caption #309
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:02Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:01Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:59Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:58Caption #154
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:53Caption #42
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:52Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:50Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:49Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:46Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:45Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:44Caption #875
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:43Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:41Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:37Caption #238
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:35Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:34Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:33Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:29Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:28Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:25Caption #859
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:24Caption #524
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:23Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:21Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:19Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:17Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:14Caption #-31
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:13Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:12Caption #301
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:10Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:09Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:08Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:06Caption #692
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:04Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:02Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:01Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:00Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:58Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:57Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:54Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:53Caption #669
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:49Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:46Caption #850
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:45Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:43Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:42Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:41Caption #657
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:39Caption #785
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:38Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:37Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:34Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:33Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:31Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:30Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:29Caption #657
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:27Caption #965
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:26Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:25Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:23Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:22Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:21Caption #571
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:20Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:19Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:18Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:16Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:15Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:13Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:12Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:11Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:09Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:08Caption #343
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:07Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:06Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:05Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:01Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:00Caption #891
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:58Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:57Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:56Caption #797
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:55Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:53Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:52Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:51Caption #117
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:50Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:49Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:45Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:43Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:42Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:41Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:37Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:35Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:34Caption #834
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:33Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:32Caption #844
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:30Caption #490
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:29Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:27Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:26Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:25Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:24Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:23Caption #67
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:21Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:19Caption #655
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:18Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:17Caption #875
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:13Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:12Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:09Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:05Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:03Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:02Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker20:48:00Caption #663
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:59Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:57Caption #43
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:53Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:52Caption #426
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:51Caption #265
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:50Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:49Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:47Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:45Caption #-24
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:44Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:43Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:41Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:40Caption #733
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:39Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:37Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:36Caption #688
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:35Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:33Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:29Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:26Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:21Caption #879
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:19Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:17Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:15Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:14Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:13Caption #879
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:11Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:10Caption #908
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:09Caption #346
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:06Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:05Caption #431
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:04Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:03Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:02Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:01Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker20:47:00Caption #-60
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:58Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:58Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:54Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:53Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:49Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:48Caption #762
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:47Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:45Caption #237
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:41Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:39Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:38Caption #883
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:37Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:36Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:35Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:34Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:33Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:31Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:29Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:28Caption #501
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:25Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:22Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:21Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:19Caption #847
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:17Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:14Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:13Caption #724
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:12Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:11Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:09Caption #878
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:08Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:05Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:04Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:02Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:01Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker20:46:00Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:59Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:58Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:57Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:54Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:53Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:52Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:50Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:49Caption #784
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:46Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:45Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:41Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:40Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:38Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:38Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:36Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:33Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:32Caption #817
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:30Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:29Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:28Caption #606
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:27Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:26Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:25Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:23Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:22Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:21Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:20Caption #122
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:19Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:18Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:17Caption #914
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:14Caption #489
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:13Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:11Caption #138
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:09Caption #914
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:08Caption #486
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:06Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:05Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:03Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:01Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker20:45:00Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:59Caption #99
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:56Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:54Caption #242
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:51Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:49Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:48Caption #674
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:47Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:45Caption #31
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:44Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:43Caption #577
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:40Caption #97
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:33Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:29Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:28Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:27Caption #367
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:26Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:23Caption #872
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:22Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:21Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:20Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:19Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:18Caption #843
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:16Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:15Caption #323
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:14Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:12Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:11Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:10Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:09Caption #537
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:06Caption #950
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:05Caption #745
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:03Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker20:44:02Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:59Caption #950
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:58Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:55Caption #224
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:54Caption #337
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:53Caption #186
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:52Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:51Caption #980
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:50Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:49Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:48Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:47Caption #-35
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:46Caption #-11
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:45Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:44Caption #-10
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:43Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker20:43:42Caption #267

Board [Post Message]



I learned one thing early, a painful lesson reaped while I was but a sapling at age 9. My first love: Julie Anne Tovey, the girl down the street, mousey hair, yellow roller boots, red swim suit and fine singer of "Frankie, do you remember me?". Oh! Oh Julie, did you love me truely?

At the end of the summer I cycled like a 9 year old boy on a bicycle down the hill, my short mother cut hair awkwardly bouncing in the wind, manically pedaling my Night Burner BMX. I stopped at the village garage (gas station) and with the money I had earnestly received by digging down the backs of the couches at the old folks home, I paid for and bought two red roses that had been standing in a white, oil encrusted mechanics bucket outside the garage all week.

I had wanted to give her a dozen roses, or even a half dozen, but the old folks had heartlessly spent most of their summer days outside instead of lying comotose on the couches inside. I thought two roses will be good, symbolic, her and I, me and her, she will like that and maybe, perhaps she will for once agree to a snog.

I remember a sweet kiss on the cheek and a smile, before I paniced and ran away. (Oh please chase me!)

Then a few days later I asked her about the roses, she said that one had died and lost all it's petals, but the other was fine. I told her that one of them represented me and the other represented her. She frowned and said to me, "You are dumped, Jamie kisses better than you."

So there is the lesson, never ever ever ever buy just two roses, one will always wither and die first, closing forever the doors of the summer of love.


There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> I got a soundtrack to your bittersweet story. Just enough for a sentimental ep.

1. Needles and pins - the Ramones
2. Strangers when we meet - the Smitereens
3. Hackensack - Fountains of Wayne
4. Caroline no - Brian Wilson

<Kumiho> If it makes you feel better, Mort, my first crush told everyone in the school that I liked him and I had to spend the next two years suffering teasing about it until my folks got transfered.
<Luminaire> Aww, Mort, that's so sweet 'n' sad.

There's a tiny spot on my monitor that I never noticed until today, and it makes the Japanese woman look like she has a bindi. It's in exactly the right spot and everything.

<Mort> That's from page 444 of my autobiography "Mort: We all got it comin'", in stores now.
<ElvisThePelvis> Funny, I just finished a book titled "Mort: You Have It Coming". Life is weird like that...
<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<Mort> "This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental."

Or so he says... I should sue.

<ElvisThePelvis> Though I truly thought this was your story:

...www.amazon.com...

<ajiav> ha! according to that link, Mort isn't even real...created by some guy named Terry Pratchett!
<Kumiho> Then... MR. Pratchett is really Mort! Terry! You're an awesome writer! PLEASE come to ORYCON this year!
<ElvisThePelvis> If Terry created Mort and Mort created us, then all reality is based on a lie.
<Mort> Pretty much.
<mypalmike> Great story today! I think the moral of the story is to buy a dozen roses and seek out some group sex.
<Mort> Happy Birthday Little Niece Heather!

Born today at 2am.

<rio> how can i draw a perfect manga work
<David Byrden> Rio; the first thing you'll need is punctuation.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post