[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 02/08/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

We were so poor growing up. All we had was a cow, until Bush's taxes on the poor meant I had to go sell it. All I got from the banker, for our cow, was some "magic seeds".

My mother spanked me hard that night, for believing that the seeds were magical. So I threw the seeds through the window and went to bed hungry and sad.

When I awoke in the morning I couldn't believe what had grown.

Now we are no longer poor and have moved on to harder drugs.
(Reuters)
(Reuters)
(AFP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:39drooled over #114
Mr. NonameLurker07:14:24Scrawled on the board
Mr. NonameLurker07:12:32Scrawled on the board
Mr. NonameLurker07:10:49Scrawled on the board


Current Users

There have been 345 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:50Caption #-4
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:48Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:46Caption #417
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:44Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:42Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:41Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:40Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:38Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:36Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:35Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:34Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:33Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:32Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:31Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:30Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:28Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:27Caption #562
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:23Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:20Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:18Caption #557
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:17Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:15Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:12Caption #540
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:11Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:08Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:07Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:06Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:05Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:03Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker01:28:01Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:59Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:58Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:56Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:55Caption #910
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:54Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:53Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:52Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:51Caption #851
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:49Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:48Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:44Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:43Caption #910
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:42Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:40Caption #157
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:39Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:38Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:37Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:36Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:35Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:34Caption #478
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:31Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:30Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:29Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:27Caption #478
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:24Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:21Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:20Caption #391
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:19Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:16Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:15Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:13Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:11Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:10Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:09Caption #850
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:08Caption #875
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:07Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:06Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:04Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:01Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker01:27:00Caption #316
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:56Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:51Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:50Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:46Caption #324
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:44Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:43Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:42Caption #566
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:41Caption #649
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:40Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:39Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:38Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:37Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:36Caption #733
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:35Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:34Caption #825
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:31Caption #877
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:28Caption #293
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:27Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:25Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:24Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:23Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:22Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:21Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:19Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:18Caption #320
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:15Caption #654
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:14Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:13Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:12Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:11Caption #385
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:10Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:09Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:08Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:07Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:06Caption #-14
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:05Caption #139
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:04Caption #435
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:03Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:02Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:01Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker01:26:00Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:59Caption #818
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:55Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:53Caption #50
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:52Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:49Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:47Caption #879
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:46Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:45Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:44Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:43Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:42Caption #342
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:41Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:40Caption #243
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:39Caption #204
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:38Caption #202
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:37Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:36Caption #274
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:35Caption #666
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:34Caption #631
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:33Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:32Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:31Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:28Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:27Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:23Caption #582
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:22Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:21Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:20Caption #455
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:15Caption #515
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:14Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:12Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:11Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:10Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:08Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:06Caption #211
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:04Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:03Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:02Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker01:25:00Caption #493
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:58Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:56Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:55Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:54Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:52Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:51Caption #545
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:49Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:48Caption #469
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:46Caption #97
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:44Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:42Caption #534
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:41Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:40Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:39Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:38Caption #89
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:36Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:35Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:34Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:33Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:32Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:28Caption #987
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:24Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:20Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:19Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:18Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:17Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:16Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:15Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:12Caption #67
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:11Caption #928
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:10Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:08Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:07Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:05Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:04Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:03Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:02Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker01:24:01Caption #807
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:59Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:58Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:56Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:55Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:54Caption #286
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:51Caption #871
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:50Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:49Caption #886
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:48Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:47Caption #800
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:46Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:43Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:42Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:41Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:40Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:39Caption #320
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:38Caption #586
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:37Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:35Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:33Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:31Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:27Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:23Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:19Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:18Caption #672
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:17Caption #824
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:15Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:14Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:13Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:12Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:11Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:10Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:07Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:06Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:03Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker01:23:01Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:59Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:55Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:54Caption #894
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:53Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:51Caption #503
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:49Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:47Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:43Caption #672
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:41Caption #293
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:39Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:36Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:35Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:31Caption #501
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:29Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:28Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:27Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:25Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:23Caption #820
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:21Caption #249
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:19Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:15Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:11Caption #631
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:10Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:07Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:06Caption #557
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:03Caption #802
Mr. NonameLurker01:22:00Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:59Caption #515
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:58Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:55Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:53Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:51Caption #953
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:49Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:48Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:47Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:43Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:41Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:39Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:36Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:35Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:33Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:31Caption #944
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:30Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:29Caption #649
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:27Caption #677
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:26Caption #969
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:23Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:19Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:16Caption #265
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:11Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:10Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:08Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:07Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:05Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:04Caption #831
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:03Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker01:21:01Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:59Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:55Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:53Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:51Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:49Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:47Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:46Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:45Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:44Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:43Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:42Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:41Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:39Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:38Caption #923
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:35Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:31Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:27Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:23Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:20Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:19Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:15Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:11Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:07Caption #487
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:03Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker01:20:01Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:59Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:57Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:55Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:53Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:52Caption #875
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:51Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:50Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:49Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:47Caption #191
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:46Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:44Caption #806
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:43Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:40Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:39Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:38Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:37Caption #33
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:36Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:35Caption #899
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:34Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:32Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:31Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:29Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:27Caption #363
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:25Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:23Caption #803
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:20Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:19Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:18Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:16Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:11Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:10Caption #417
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:09Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:08Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:04Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:03Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker01:19:00Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker01:18:56Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker01:18:54Caption #857
Mr. NonameLurker01:18:51Caption #14

Board [Post Message]

So here I am in my father-in-laws, without a single tool to manipulate images or connect securely to unix.

One thing my father-in-law does have though, is a very cool cat, I have nasty red lacerations all over my body to prove how playful he is. You might not know that I am deadly allergic to cats, another thing you might not know is that I have a stupid tendency to throw common sense out of the window and play with cats...

So Saturday night became sort of strange, in a kind of itchy, sneezy and deadly wheezing way. I also brought my empty asthma inhaler to Oregon, which made it very hard for me to go to sleep, instead I (using my allergy infected brain) had many weird but connected dreams. Here is my dream log:

1 am, finally managed to fall asleep, I dreamt that I had an email from Carol on mostemailed.com. Suddenly as I read it I was at her house, which was a wonderful rose covered cottage. We sat and had tea together, which is strange since I hate tea, she was a 20 something version of Miss Marple. I woke up at 1:30am wheezing.

1:50am fell asleep again, this time I had an email from guyPaulo, again I was dragged (screaming) to his house. He lived on a farm, he was dressed like a hick with a straw coming out of his mouth. We talked about the price of pigs and the uses of chicken gizzards, he made innuendos about pigs and chicken gizzards. I woke up at 2:10am wheezing and wondering why I was dreaming all this.

Fell asleep again at 2.15am, this time I had an email from Lauren, and I was zapped to her very cool brown stone townhouse. Inside it had the most marvelous floors and moldings, Lauren was rollerskating around leaving mad wheel marks on the wood floor. I woke myself up again by coughing.

Once more I managed to fall asleep at around 2:45am, and once more I had an email, this one from Mountaineer. I found myself in a very cozy Mongolian tent/hut made out of Yak skins, there was a large fire inside and Mountaineer gave me a cup of tea with fermented yak butter in, which is again strange since I don't like tea... We toasted a few marshmallows on the fire then she said we needed to spy. So we looked outside the tent and saw a hoard of Mongoloids majestically sweeping across the plains. I woke up again sweating and wheezing.

I fell asleep about 10 minutes later. I received another email. This time I was in a car chase, on the streets of San Francisco I think, the cars were all 1970's Cadilacesque. We were chasing a serial killer, I saw him in the car driving next to me, he looked very intense. I automatically assumed it was Yoyology.

I woke up, it was 4am, and I couldn't make myself sleep anymore after that nightmare and the wheezing in my lungs. So instead I went online to write cryptic comments in peoples livejournals.

Sorry for the bad spelling and grandma.


There are 23 messages for this day.
<guyPaulo> I'm starting to think that the middle photo is a pic of Mort's garage.
<yoyology> My stars! The otter is back!
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Lauren> Carol's place sounds coziest, but I would rather visit the mountaineer abode of your dreams, Mort. You might need to talk to someone about your fear of guy and yoyo.

For the sake of accuracy in your dreams, I must tell you that I do live in a townhouse in the center of a large east coast city. However, my floors are carpeted and the walls are mostly wood (one wall in the living room is brick). There are no moldings anywhere in the house, but I do have an Eames wood burning stove in the living room. The place was designed and built in 1927 by Architect George Daub in a style that is a cross between Art Deco and Mission. It is really cool.

<guyPaulo> Don't fear the farm Mort. Its fun once you get used to it. Bring some girls when you come next time and we'll play "hide the skinny pink hog in the chick(en)'s gizzard until he spits sour cream."
<JulieK> Mort you and I are the same in regards to CATS! They are irresistable.
<guyPaulo> Hehe, here's a link for the "dog-lovers" out there.
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Lauren> OMG, the one on the far right looks like my dog, only smaller. My little guy weighs 60 pounds. I wonder how much I could get for him in Hanoi...
<Mort> I was just letting you know that you are beginning to infect my dreams.
Mountaineer's place was the best, I spent the most time in that dream. She was easy to hang out with for a spy.
<yoyology> What on earth would make you think I'm a serial killer?
<3Suns> What worries me most about the dog picture is those things on the right side of the table on top of the pile. They look like split watermelons.

I never knew you could go anywere to buy "half a dog"

<Lauren> If they had been saggital cuts, I would have assumed they were for those with smaller families, but those look to be horizontal cross sections. My guess would be that there are just certain dishes where dog butt is the wrong cut.
<Miss Marple> I told Mort that yoyology was responsible for the dead body in the library.
<Jmofwiw> What kind of wine goes with dog?
<yoyology> How about a nice barkundy? Or a Cabernet Sauooooooooovignon?
<yoyology> And, just for the record, one dead patron doesn't make me a serial killer.
<3Suns> Yoyology... in the library... with the lead pipe!
<Jmofwiw> I guess I'd have to check the Whine List.
<yoyology> I always liked the rope.
<guyPaulo> "Barkles" and James Wine Cooler. Thank you for your support.
<guyPaulo> Get it? "Bark" and "Bartles"......
<yoyology> Uhhhhh, nope. I don't get it. Please explain in more detail. Can I get a diagram? I'm more of a visual learner.
<Mort> The serial killer just looked very intense, and I guess to my unconcious mind you come over as intense Yoyo.
<David Byrden> I have to log off in 3 minutes.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post