[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 02/08/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

We were so poor growing up. All we had was a cow, until Bush's taxes on the poor meant I had to go sell it. All I got from the banker, for our cow, was some "magic seeds".

My mother spanked me hard that night, for believing that the seeds were magical. So I threw the seeds through the window and went to bed hungry and sad.

When I awoke in the morning I couldn't believe what had grown.

Now we are no longer poor and have moved on to harder drugs.
(Reuters)
(Reuters)
(AFP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 197 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:32Caption #-4
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:31Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:30Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:29Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:28Caption #475
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:27Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:26Caption #855
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:25Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:24Caption #834
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:23Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:22Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:21Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:20Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:19Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:18Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:17Caption #551
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:16Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:14Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:12Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:11Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:10Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:09Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:08Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:07Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:06Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:05Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:04Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:01Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker11:19:00Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:59Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:58Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:56Caption #844
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:55Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:52Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:51Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:49Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:46Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:45Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:44Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:42Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:40Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:39Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:38Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:37Caption #761
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:36Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:35Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:34Caption #551
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:33Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:32Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:31Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:30Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:27Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:20Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker11:18:05Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:59Caption #788
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:55Caption #33
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:54Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:53Caption #368
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:45Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:41Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:40Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:35Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:30Caption #792
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:19Caption #182
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:16Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:07Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:04Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker11:17:00Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:58Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:56Caption #475
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:55Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:54Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:52Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:51Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:50Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:49Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:47Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:46Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:45Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:43Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:42Caption #490
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:41Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:39Caption #-28
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:36Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:35Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:34Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:33Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:32Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:31Caption #764
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:30Caption #288
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:29Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:27Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:26Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:25Caption #719
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:24Caption #-3
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:23Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:19Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:18Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:15Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:12Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:11Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:09Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:08Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker11:16:05Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker11:15:40Caption #685
Mr. NonameLurker11:15:39Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker11:15:23Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker11:15:21Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker11:15:19Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker11:15:17Caption #471
Mr. NonameLurker11:15:16Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker11:15:15Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:59Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:54Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:50Caption #139
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:47Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:37Caption #847
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:33Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:30Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:26Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:22Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:10Caption #211
Mr. NonameLurker11:14:00Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:57Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:56Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:55Caption #401
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:45Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:34Caption #776
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:32Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:26Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:25Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:22Caption #138
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:06Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:04Caption #-32
Mr. NonameLurker11:13:03Caption #211
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:54Caption #904
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:53Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:45Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:44Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:42Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:41Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:39Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:36Caption #517
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:35Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:34Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:28Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:23Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:08Caption #249
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:05Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:04Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:03Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:01Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker11:12:00Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:59Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:58Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:55Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:49Caption #776
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:46Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:43Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:39Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:35Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:24Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:20Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:19Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:17Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:16Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:15Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:11Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:09Caption #435
Mr. NonameLurker11:11:05Caption #-32
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:59Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:58Caption #942
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:56Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:51Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:49Caption #391
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:46Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:37Caption #314
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:33Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:31Caption #99
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:24Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:21Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:19Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:06Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:04Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker11:10:00Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:59Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:55Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:54Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:49Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:48Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:47Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:45Caption #159
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:42Caption #958
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:41Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:40Caption #770
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:36Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker11:09:35Caption #272

Board [Post Message]

So here I am in my father-in-laws, without a single tool to manipulate images or connect securely to unix.

One thing my father-in-law does have though, is a very cool cat, I have nasty red lacerations all over my body to prove how playful he is. You might not know that I am deadly allergic to cats, another thing you might not know is that I have a stupid tendency to throw common sense out of the window and play with cats...

So Saturday night became sort of strange, in a kind of itchy, sneezy and deadly wheezing way. I also brought my empty asthma inhaler to Oregon, which made it very hard for me to go to sleep, instead I (using my allergy infected brain) had many weird but connected dreams. Here is my dream log:

1 am, finally managed to fall asleep, I dreamt that I had an email from Carol on mostemailed.com. Suddenly as I read it I was at her house, which was a wonderful rose covered cottage. We sat and had tea together, which is strange since I hate tea, she was a 20 something version of Miss Marple. I woke up at 1:30am wheezing.

1:50am fell asleep again, this time I had an email from guyPaulo, again I was dragged (screaming) to his house. He lived on a farm, he was dressed like a hick with a straw coming out of his mouth. We talked about the price of pigs and the uses of chicken gizzards, he made innuendos about pigs and chicken gizzards. I woke up at 2:10am wheezing and wondering why I was dreaming all this.

Fell asleep again at 2.15am, this time I had an email from Lauren, and I was zapped to her very cool brown stone townhouse. Inside it had the most marvelous floors and moldings, Lauren was rollerskating around leaving mad wheel marks on the wood floor. I woke myself up again by coughing.

Once more I managed to fall asleep at around 2:45am, and once more I had an email, this one from Mountaineer. I found myself in a very cozy Mongolian tent/hut made out of Yak skins, there was a large fire inside and Mountaineer gave me a cup of tea with fermented yak butter in, which is again strange since I don't like tea... We toasted a few marshmallows on the fire then she said we needed to spy. So we looked outside the tent and saw a hoard of Mongoloids majestically sweeping across the plains. I woke up again sweating and wheezing.

I fell asleep about 10 minutes later. I received another email. This time I was in a car chase, on the streets of San Francisco I think, the cars were all 1970's Cadilacesque. We were chasing a serial killer, I saw him in the car driving next to me, he looked very intense. I automatically assumed it was Yoyology.

I woke up, it was 4am, and I couldn't make myself sleep anymore after that nightmare and the wheezing in my lungs. So instead I went online to write cryptic comments in peoples livejournals.

Sorry for the bad spelling and grandma.


There are 23 messages for this day.
<guyPaulo> I'm starting to think that the middle photo is a pic of Mort's garage.
<yoyology> My stars! The otter is back!
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Lauren> Carol's place sounds coziest, but I would rather visit the mountaineer abode of your dreams, Mort. You might need to talk to someone about your fear of guy and yoyo.

For the sake of accuracy in your dreams, I must tell you that I do live in a townhouse in the center of a large east coast city. However, my floors are carpeted and the walls are mostly wood (one wall in the living room is brick). There are no moldings anywhere in the house, but I do have an Eames wood burning stove in the living room. The place was designed and built in 1927 by Architect George Daub in a style that is a cross between Art Deco and Mission. It is really cool.

<guyPaulo> Don't fear the farm Mort. Its fun once you get used to it. Bring some girls when you come next time and we'll play "hide the skinny pink hog in the chick(en)'s gizzard until he spits sour cream."
<JulieK> Mort you and I are the same in regards to CATS! They are irresistable.
<guyPaulo> Hehe, here's a link for the "dog-lovers" out there.
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Lauren> OMG, the one on the far right looks like my dog, only smaller. My little guy weighs 60 pounds. I wonder how much I could get for him in Hanoi...
<Mort> I was just letting you know that you are beginning to infect my dreams.
Mountaineer's place was the best, I spent the most time in that dream. She was easy to hang out with for a spy.
<yoyology> What on earth would make you think I'm a serial killer?
<3Suns> What worries me most about the dog picture is those things on the right side of the table on top of the pile. They look like split watermelons.

I never knew you could go anywere to buy "half a dog"

<Lauren> If they had been saggital cuts, I would have assumed they were for those with smaller families, but those look to be horizontal cross sections. My guess would be that there are just certain dishes where dog butt is the wrong cut.
<Miss Marple> I told Mort that yoyology was responsible for the dead body in the library.
<Jmofwiw> What kind of wine goes with dog?
<yoyology> How about a nice barkundy? Or a Cabernet Sauooooooooovignon?
<yoyology> And, just for the record, one dead patron doesn't make me a serial killer.
<3Suns> Yoyology... in the library... with the lead pipe!
<Jmofwiw> I guess I'd have to check the Whine List.
<yoyology> I always liked the rope.
<guyPaulo> "Barkles" and James Wine Cooler. Thank you for your support.
<guyPaulo> Get it? "Bark" and "Bartles"......
<yoyology> Uhhhhh, nope. I don't get it. Please explain in more detail. Can I get a diagram? I'm more of a visual learner.
<Mort> The serial killer just looked very intense, and I guess to my unconcious mind you come over as intense Yoyo.
<David Byrden> I have to log off in 3 minutes.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post