[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 03/28/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Hush, little baby, don't make a sound

Mama's gonna buy you a little hound

If that little hound don't bark

Mama's gonna feed it to a hungry shark

Then Mama's going to chop up that good for nothing f*$%ing son of a b*&ch who knocked Mama up and ran away.
(AP)
(Reuters)
(AP)
Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 299 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker20:59:05Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker20:59:04Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker20:59:03Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker20:59:02Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker20:59:01Caption #-56
Mr. NonameLurker20:59:00Caption #639
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:58Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:56Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:55Caption #289
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:54Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:53Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:52Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:51Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:50Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:44Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:42Caption #96
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:39Caption #276
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:38Caption #202
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:33Caption #558
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:28Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:26Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:23Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:16Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:15Caption #211
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:12Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:11Caption #727
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:10Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:09Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:08Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:07Caption #634
Mr. NonameLurker20:58:02Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:57Caption #692
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:55Caption #966
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:53Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:52Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:51Caption #748
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:50Caption #807
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:49Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:48Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:47Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:43Caption #343
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:39Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:37Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:34Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:29Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:26Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:25Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:24Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:23Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:22Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:21Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:20Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:19Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:16Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:11Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:10Caption #272
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:09Caption #969
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:04Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:03Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker20:57:02Caption #491
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:58Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:57Caption #955
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:56Caption #733
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:55Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:54Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:53Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:52Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:51Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:50Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:45Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:44Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:43Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:42Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:41Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:40Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:39Caption #865
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:36Caption #942
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:34Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:33Caption #900
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:31Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:28Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:24Caption #895
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:21Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:18Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:16Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:13Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:12Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:11Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:10Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:09Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:08Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:07Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:06Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:05Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:04Caption #754
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:03Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:02Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker20:56:00Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:56Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:55Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:54Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:53Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:52Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:51Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:50Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:49Caption #237
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:45Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:44Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:43Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:40Caption #505
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:34Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:33Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:29Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:27Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:26Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:25Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:23Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:21Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:20Caption #809
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:19Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:18Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:17Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:16Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:15Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:14Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:13Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:08Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:06Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:03Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:02Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker20:55:01Caption #631
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:59Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:58Caption #672
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:54Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:52Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:51Caption #719
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:45Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:44Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:41Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:39Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:37Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:34Caption #431
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:33Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:32Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:31Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:30Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:29Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:28Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:27Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:26Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:25Caption #826
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:21Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:20Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:19Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:18Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:17Caption #202
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:16Caption #968
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:15Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:14Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:13Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:07Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:06Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker20:54:02Caption #219
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:58Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:51Caption #725
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:50Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:49Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:48Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:46Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:41Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:40Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:33Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:30Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:29Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:27Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:22Caption #343
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:19Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:18Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:17Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:13Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:12Caption #193
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:09Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:08Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:07Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:06Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:05Caption #291
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:03Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker20:53:02Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:57Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:56Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:55Caption #662
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:54Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:50Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:49Caption #96
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:48Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:45Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:40Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:39Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:38Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:35Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:34Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:33Caption #545
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:32Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:31Caption #417
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:30Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:28Caption #883
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:27Caption #282
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:26Caption #215
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:25Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:22Caption #958
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:21Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:20Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:19Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:18Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:15Caption #809
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:14Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:12Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:11Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:10Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:08Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:06Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:04Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:02Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker20:52:01Caption #103
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:59Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:58Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:57Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:56Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:54Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:53Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:52Caption #204
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:51Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:50Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:49Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:48Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:47Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:46Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:45Caption #97
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:44Caption #973
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:43Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:42Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:40Caption #849
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:39Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:38Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:37Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:36Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:35Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:34Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:33Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:29Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:25Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:24Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:23Caption #960
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:19Caption #652
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:16Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:14Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:13Caption #672
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:11Caption #870
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:03Caption #532
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:02Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker20:51:01Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:58Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:47Caption #892
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:46Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:45Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:37Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:36Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:31Caption #67
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:27Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:25Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:24Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:23Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:22Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:21Caption #652
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:19Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:17Caption #157
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:10Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:08Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:06Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:04Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:03Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:01Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker20:50:00Caption #524
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:56Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:42Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:38Caption #829
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:34Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:33Caption #956
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:32Caption #-64
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:27Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:26Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:19Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:18Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:17Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:12Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:11Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:10Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:08Caption #188
Mr. NonameLurker20:49:05Caption #441

Board [Post Message]

Ok, time for a concise version for the weirdest, most epic dream I ever had.
From Saturday morning:

Aliens came and killed half the people on Earth, the other half they made into more aliens. I escaped and joined up with a band of resistance fighters. Sydney Bristow from Alias was also a member of the band, we decided to team up together.

The base for the resistance was the village where I grew up, and the head quarters of the aliens was the town four miles away. Sydney and I were put on a mission to get to the alien HQ and blow it up. To get there we had to take the train from my village to the town. We went to the train station, and this is where everything turned world war two, the aliens all became germans officers or people. We disguised ourselves as bravarian, Sydney wore a Bravarian dress (kinda like a swiss milk maid) with incredibly cute pigtails, I wore laderhosen.

We also took with us our 50 pet chicks and ducks and geese, they were also dressed in Bravarian dresses, and were holding each other by the wings and waltzing up and down the train platform.

We got on the train with our animals and sat down together, the train started and the conductor came to get our tickets. We didn't have any alien money so we made excuses and quickly jumped off the train at the next stop.

We were still 2 miles from the town, Sydney didn't want to walk down the tracks in case we were seen, I pointed out a door in the track wall and the forrest beyond. Sydney and I changed into our spy gear, she wore a catsuit, I dressed like James Bond, both of us put on elven cloaks, we went through the door.

We were walking around the edge of a field when in front of us we saw a hobbit, it was Frodo, on his quest to destroy the ring. Following Frodo secretly was Bilbo, so we secretly followed him. Frodo turned around and spotted Bilbo then started to talk to him, we dove to the ground so they wouldn't see us under our elven cloaks. Frodo spotted us but ignored us, Sydney whispered "Different story-line!" into my ear.

Then medieval horse men came over the hill, they must have been after Frodo. Bilbo and Frodo ran off into the forrest, we stayed on the ground under the cloaks hiding (and cuddling but don't tell Morticia that, come on Sydney is Hot!)One of the horse men saw us and came at me with an arrow. I grabbed the arrow and was about to run off when they threatened to kill Sydney. I told them I was a doctor and she was my nurse and that I had the King's arrow, I held up the arrow for them to see.

We were taken to a castle and into the King's chambers, he was sick. Using our knowledge from the future we healed him, but were still not allowed to leave the castle. In the courtyard we met up with two other members of the resistance, they were Lee Majors and the helicopter guy from Magnum PI. Lee Majors was holding a lyre and the helicopter guy was holding an olde-world double bass.

We did what any cheesy time travel based tv show/film would do in this predicament: we played rock music for the medieval people!

They loved it! They let us go and I woke up.

And that's the short version of the dream.

There are 19 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Mort: there are some dreams that reveal dark secrets about your subconscious personality. And there are some dreams that are just crazy shit for the sake of it.

But this, I believe, is one of the rare dreams that accurately and precisely depicts the future.

<guyPaulo> I had a crappy weekend. the damn government took away my goats...
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Mort> I welcome this future, just because it involves cuddling with Sydney Bristow and listening to the raw lyre rock skills of Lee Majors.
<Lauren> Mort, I have seen the future and can tell you only that Lee Majors is not part of it. Sorry.
<Jellyloo> I have seen an alternate future where everyone is Lee Majors.
<obtuse> I had a dream last week about an alternate dimension where everyone was a motorcycle. We were made out of 3 or 4 components that you could swap out to improve performance. It was kind of like a video game cause we were racing around a big track in the middle of a desert that looked strangely like my elementary school playground.
<Mort> "Being John Malkovich" might actually have been more amusing if it had been "Being Lee Majors".

Obtuse, your dream is reminding me of Automan.

<yoyology> guy, according to that article, you were also probed by the state of Vermont. I imagine that wasn't fun either.
<yoyology> Mort, I'd like to request the Hindu guy buried up to his neck for tomorrow. I've got ideas a-poppin'!
<guyPaulo> Thank you for your concern yoyo. The other monkie's seemed to just ignore my plight...
<Mort> He looks too far down the list to pick for a normal day. I will add him on guest day though.
<Kumiho> Oh dear, guyP. Did it hurt much? And how did you stand the stench?
<Kumiho> Or is that a stupid question to ask the coiner of the term "ED"?
<Kumiho> Is it me, or is the photo really about her assets? (Don't mind me, I just got back from my accounting class.)
<Kumiho> Oh, yeah, the photo....story.news.yahoo.com...
<guyPaulo> T&A is always a driving factor for the yahoo photos.
<mypalmike> Or just T.
<obtuse> Not especially young, supple T either.
<jeffR> Mort that is awesome


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post