[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 03/28/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Hush, little baby, don't make a sound

Mama's gonna buy you a little hound

If that little hound don't bark

Mama's gonna feed it to a hungry shark

Then Mama's going to chop up that good for nothing f*$%ing son of a b*&ch who knocked Mama up and ran away.
(AP)
(Reuters)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 313 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:21Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:20Caption #983
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:19Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:18Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:17Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:15Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:14Caption #455
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:12Caption #107
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:11Caption #255
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:10Caption #505
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:09Caption #122
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:08Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:07Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:06Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:05Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:04Caption #491
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:03Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:02Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:01Caption #309
Mr. NonameLurker02:39:00Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:57Caption #834
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:56Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:54Caption #856
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:53Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:52Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:50Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:49Caption #870
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:48Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:47Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:46Caption #493
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:44Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:43Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:42Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:41Caption #928
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:39Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:37Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:36Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:35Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:33Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:32Caption #902
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:30Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:29Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:28Caption #755
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:27Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:25Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:24Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:23Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:22Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:21Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:20Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:18Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:16Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:13Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:12Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:11Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:09Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:06Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:05Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:03Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:02Caption #346
Mr. NonameLurker02:38:00Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:59Caption #583
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:58Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:57Caption #991
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:56Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:55Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:54Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:52Caption #836
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:49Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:47Caption #833
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:46Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:45Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:44Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:43Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:42Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:41Caption #646
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:40Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:39Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:36Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:32Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:27Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:26Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:24Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:23Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:22Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:21Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:16Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:15Caption #626
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:14Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:13Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:12Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:10Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:09Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:08Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:06Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:05Caption #958
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:04Caption #351
Mr. NonameLurker02:37:02Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:57Caption #972
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:53Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:52Caption #748
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:49Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:46Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:37Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:36Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:35Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:34Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:33Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:31Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:25Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:23Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:22Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:21Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:20Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:14Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:13Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:11Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:09Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:08Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:07Caption #710
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:05Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:04Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:02Caption #461
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:01Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker02:36:00Caption #-85
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:59Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:52Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:49Caption #788
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:48Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:45Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:42Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:39Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:38Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:37Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:33Caption #157
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:31Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:22Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:21Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:18Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:17Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:16Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:15Caption #-76
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:11Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:10Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:09Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:05Caption #719
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:03Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker02:35:02Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:59Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:58Caption #355
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:56Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:46Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:43Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:41Caption #946
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:40Caption #662
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:38Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:36Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:32Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:31Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:30Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:27Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:26Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:25Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:24Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:21Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:19Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:17Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:16Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:14Caption #544
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:12Caption #754
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:11Caption #108
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:10Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:09Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:05Caption #870
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:03Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker02:34:01Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:57Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:56Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:54Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:53Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:48Caption #921
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:44Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:42Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:40Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:37Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:34Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:31Caption #342
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:24Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:23Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:22Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:20Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:15Caption #851
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:14Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:13Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:11Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:09Caption #834
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:06Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:04Caption #667
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:03Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:02Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker02:33:00Caption #456
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:57Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:56Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:55Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:53Caption #867
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:51Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:50Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:48Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:43Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:41Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:40Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:39Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:37Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:33Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:32Caption #327
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:31Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:27Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:24Caption #528
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:23Caption #639
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:21Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:19Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:18Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:17Caption #588
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:16Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:15Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:14Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:13Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:12Caption #293
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:10Caption #242
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:08Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:07Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:05Caption #673
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:04Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:03Caption #415
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:02Caption #737
Mr. NonameLurker02:32:00Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:58Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:57Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:55Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:54Caption #857
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:53Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:52Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:50Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:48Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:47Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:46Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:45Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:41Caption #899
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:40Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:37Caption #838
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:36Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:34Caption #839
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:32Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:27Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:24Caption #699
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:23Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:22Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:20Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:18Caption #847
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:16Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:14Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:13Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:12Caption #815
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:11Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:09Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:06Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:05Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker02:31:03Caption #788
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:57Caption #219
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:55Caption #963
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:54Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:52Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:50Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:47Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:45Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:42Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:41Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:40Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:39Caption #271
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:38Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:32Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:31Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:24Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:23Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:21Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:18Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:16Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:15Caption #824
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:12Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:10Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:05Caption #678
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:04Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:03Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker02:30:00Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:59Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:57Caption #241
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:52Caption #405
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:51Caption #809
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:50Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:46Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:44Caption #767
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:43Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:42Caption #854
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:37Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:36Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:33Caption #157
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:32Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:29Caption #765
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:26Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:25Caption #80
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:24Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:23Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker02:29:21Main Page

Board [Post Message]

Ok, time for a concise version for the weirdest, most epic dream I ever had.
From Saturday morning:

Aliens came and killed half the people on Earth, the other half they made into more aliens. I escaped and joined up with a band of resistance fighters. Sydney Bristow from Alias was also a member of the band, we decided to team up together.

The base for the resistance was the village where I grew up, and the head quarters of the aliens was the town four miles away. Sydney and I were put on a mission to get to the alien HQ and blow it up. To get there we had to take the train from my village to the town. We went to the train station, and this is where everything turned world war two, the aliens all became germans officers or people. We disguised ourselves as bravarian, Sydney wore a Bravarian dress (kinda like a swiss milk maid) with incredibly cute pigtails, I wore laderhosen.

We also took with us our 50 pet chicks and ducks and geese, they were also dressed in Bravarian dresses, and were holding each other by the wings and waltzing up and down the train platform.

We got on the train with our animals and sat down together, the train started and the conductor came to get our tickets. We didn't have any alien money so we made excuses and quickly jumped off the train at the next stop.

We were still 2 miles from the town, Sydney didn't want to walk down the tracks in case we were seen, I pointed out a door in the track wall and the forrest beyond. Sydney and I changed into our spy gear, she wore a catsuit, I dressed like James Bond, both of us put on elven cloaks, we went through the door.

We were walking around the edge of a field when in front of us we saw a hobbit, it was Frodo, on his quest to destroy the ring. Following Frodo secretly was Bilbo, so we secretly followed him. Frodo turned around and spotted Bilbo then started to talk to him, we dove to the ground so they wouldn't see us under our elven cloaks. Frodo spotted us but ignored us, Sydney whispered "Different story-line!" into my ear.

Then medieval horse men came over the hill, they must have been after Frodo. Bilbo and Frodo ran off into the forrest, we stayed on the ground under the cloaks hiding (and cuddling but don't tell Morticia that, come on Sydney is Hot!)One of the horse men saw us and came at me with an arrow. I grabbed the arrow and was about to run off when they threatened to kill Sydney. I told them I was a doctor and she was my nurse and that I had the King's arrow, I held up the arrow for them to see.

We were taken to a castle and into the King's chambers, he was sick. Using our knowledge from the future we healed him, but were still not allowed to leave the castle. In the courtyard we met up with two other members of the resistance, they were Lee Majors and the helicopter guy from Magnum PI. Lee Majors was holding a lyre and the helicopter guy was holding an olde-world double bass.

We did what any cheesy time travel based tv show/film would do in this predicament: we played rock music for the medieval people!

They loved it! They let us go and I woke up.

And that's the short version of the dream.


There are 19 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Mort: there are some dreams that reveal dark secrets about your subconscious personality. And there are some dreams that are just crazy shit for the sake of it.

But this, I believe, is one of the rare dreams that accurately and precisely depicts the future.

<guyPaulo> I had a crappy weekend. the damn government took away my goats...
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Mort> I welcome this future, just because it involves cuddling with Sydney Bristow and listening to the raw lyre rock skills of Lee Majors.
<Lauren> Mort, I have seen the future and can tell you only that Lee Majors is not part of it. Sorry.
<Jellyloo> I have seen an alternate future where everyone is Lee Majors.
<obtuse> I had a dream last week about an alternate dimension where everyone was a motorcycle. We were made out of 3 or 4 components that you could swap out to improve performance. It was kind of like a video game cause we were racing around a big track in the middle of a desert that looked strangely like my elementary school playground.
<Mort> "Being John Malkovich" might actually have been more amusing if it had been "Being Lee Majors".

Obtuse, your dream is reminding me of Automan.

<yoyology> guy, according to that article, you were also probed by the state of Vermont. I imagine that wasn't fun either.
<yoyology> Mort, I'd like to request the Hindu guy buried up to his neck for tomorrow. I've got ideas a-poppin'!
<guyPaulo> Thank you for your concern yoyo. The other monkie's seemed to just ignore my plight...
<Mort> He looks too far down the list to pick for a normal day. I will add him on guest day though.
<Kumiho> Oh dear, guyP. Did it hurt much? And how did you stand the stench?
<Kumiho> Or is that a stupid question to ask the coiner of the term "ED"?
<Kumiho> Is it me, or is the photo really about her assets? (Don't mind me, I just got back from my accounting class.)
<Kumiho> Oh, yeah, the photo....story.news.yahoo.com...
<guyPaulo> T&A is always a driving factor for the yahoo photos.
<mypalmike> Or just T.
<obtuse> Not especially young, supple T either.
<jeffR> Mort that is awesome


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post