[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 03/28/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Hush, little baby, don't make a sound

Mama's gonna buy you a little hound

If that little hound don't bark

Mama's gonna feed it to a hungry shark

Then Mama's going to chop up that good for nothing f*$%ing son of a b*&ch who knocked Mama up and ran away.
(AP)
(Reuters)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 374 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:37Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:36Caption #400
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:35Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:34Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:33Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:32Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:30Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:29Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:28Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:27Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:26Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:25Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:24Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:23Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:22Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:21Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:20Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:19Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:18Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:05Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:04Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:03Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:02Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:01Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker15:38:00Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:59Caption #818
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:58Caption #215
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:57Caption #847
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:56Caption #139
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:55Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:54Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:52Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:51Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:50Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:49Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:48Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:47Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:46Caption #635
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:45Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:44Caption #955
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:43Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:38Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:32Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:26Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:25Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:24Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:23Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:22Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:21Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:20Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:19Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:18Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:17Caption #606
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:16Caption #841
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:15Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:14Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:13Caption #539
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:12Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:11Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:10Caption #475
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:09Caption #666
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:08Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:07Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:05Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:04Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:03Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:02Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:01Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker15:37:00Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:59Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:58Caption #912
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:57Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:56Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:55Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:54Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:53Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:52Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:51Caption #-2
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:50Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:49Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:48Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:47Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:46Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:34Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:28Caption #825
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:23Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:22Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:21Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:20Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:19Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:18Caption #544
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:17Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:16Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:15Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:14Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:13Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:12Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:11Caption #647
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:10Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:09Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:08Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:07Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:06Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:05Caption #770
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:04Caption #886
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:03Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:02Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker15:36:00Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:59Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:55Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:50Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:49Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:48Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:47Caption #895
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:46Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:45Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:44Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:43Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:42Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:41Caption #255
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:40Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:39Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:38Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:37Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:36Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:35Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:34Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:33Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:32Caption #338
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:31Caption #655
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:30Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:25Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:21Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:20Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:19Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:18Caption #193
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:17Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:16Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:15Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:14Caption #377
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:13Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:12Caption #867
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:09Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:08Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:07Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:06Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:05Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:04Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:03Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:02Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:01Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker15:35:00Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:59Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:55Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:49Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:48Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:47Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:45Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:44Caption #108
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:42Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:41Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:40Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:39Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:38Caption #324
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:37Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:36Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:35Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:34Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:33Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:32Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:31Caption #84
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:30Caption #489
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:29Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:28Caption #657
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:27Caption #351
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:26Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:25Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:24Caption #491
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:16Caption #562
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:15Caption #293
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:14Caption #842
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:08Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:07Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:06Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:05Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:04Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:03Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:02Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:01Caption #96
Mr. NonameLurker15:34:00Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:59Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:57Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:56Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:55Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:54Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:53Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:52Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:51Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:50Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:49Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:48Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:46Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:45Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:44Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:43Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:42Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:41Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:40Caption #935
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:39Caption #355
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:38Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:33Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:32Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:31Caption #-5
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:28Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:23Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:21Caption #342
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:16Caption #657
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:15Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:13Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:12Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:11Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:09Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:05Caption #821
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:03Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:02Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:01Caption #908
Mr. NonameLurker15:33:00Caption #881
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:59Caption #-53
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:58Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:57Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:55Caption #674
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:54Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:52Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:49Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:48Caption #710
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:47Caption #667
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:46Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:43Caption #869
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:42Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:38Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:37Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:35Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:34Caption #455
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:33Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:32Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:29Caption #363
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:28Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:25Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:24Caption #855
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:22Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:21Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:19Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:18Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:13Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:11Caption #89
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:09Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:08Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:07Caption #858
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:06Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:04Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:03Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:01Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker15:32:00Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:59Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:58Caption #685
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:57Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:56Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:55Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:53Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:52Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:49Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:48Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:47Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:46Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:44Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:43Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:38Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:34Caption #634
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:33Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:32Caption #487
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:28Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:26Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:25Caption #659
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:24Caption #372
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:23Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:22Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:18Caption #478
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:13Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:12Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:08Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:06Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:04Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:03Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:02Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker15:31:01Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:59Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:58Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:57Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:52Caption #276
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:50Caption #151
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:49Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:48Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:47Caption #31
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:46Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:44Caption #849
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:43Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:42Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:41Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:40Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:39Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:38Caption #937
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:37Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:36Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:35Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:34Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:27Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:15Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:09Caption #908
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:08Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:07Caption #444
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:06Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker15:30:03Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:58Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:51Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:48Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:46Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:45Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:43Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:41Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:39Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:38Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:37Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:36Caption #346
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:35Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:34Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:32Caption #372
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:31Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:27Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:25Caption #840
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:23Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:22Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:21Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:20Caption #238
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:17Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:16Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:14Caption #-8
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:13Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:12Caption #-60
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:11Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:06Caption #557
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:05Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:04Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:03Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:02Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:01Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker15:29:00Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:59Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:58Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:57Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:56Caption #719
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:55Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:54Caption #490
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:53Caption #678
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:52Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:51Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:50Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:49Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:47Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:46Caption #945
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:42Caption #646
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:41Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:40Caption #256
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:39Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker15:28:38Caption #226

Board [Post Message]

Ok, time for a concise version for the weirdest, most epic dream I ever had.
From Saturday morning:

Aliens came and killed half the people on Earth, the other half they made into more aliens. I escaped and joined up with a band of resistance fighters. Sydney Bristow from Alias was also a member of the band, we decided to team up together.

The base for the resistance was the village where I grew up, and the head quarters of the aliens was the town four miles away. Sydney and I were put on a mission to get to the alien HQ and blow it up. To get there we had to take the train from my village to the town. We went to the train station, and this is where everything turned world war two, the aliens all became germans officers or people. We disguised ourselves as bravarian, Sydney wore a Bravarian dress (kinda like a swiss milk maid) with incredibly cute pigtails, I wore laderhosen.

We also took with us our 50 pet chicks and ducks and geese, they were also dressed in Bravarian dresses, and were holding each other by the wings and waltzing up and down the train platform.

We got on the train with our animals and sat down together, the train started and the conductor came to get our tickets. We didn't have any alien money so we made excuses and quickly jumped off the train at the next stop.

We were still 2 miles from the town, Sydney didn't want to walk down the tracks in case we were seen, I pointed out a door in the track wall and the forrest beyond. Sydney and I changed into our spy gear, she wore a catsuit, I dressed like James Bond, both of us put on elven cloaks, we went through the door.

We were walking around the edge of a field when in front of us we saw a hobbit, it was Frodo, on his quest to destroy the ring. Following Frodo secretly was Bilbo, so we secretly followed him. Frodo turned around and spotted Bilbo then started to talk to him, we dove to the ground so they wouldn't see us under our elven cloaks. Frodo spotted us but ignored us, Sydney whispered "Different story-line!" into my ear.

Then medieval horse men came over the hill, they must have been after Frodo. Bilbo and Frodo ran off into the forrest, we stayed on the ground under the cloaks hiding (and cuddling but don't tell Morticia that, come on Sydney is Hot!)One of the horse men saw us and came at me with an arrow. I grabbed the arrow and was about to run off when they threatened to kill Sydney. I told them I was a doctor and she was my nurse and that I had the King's arrow, I held up the arrow for them to see.

We were taken to a castle and into the King's chambers, he was sick. Using our knowledge from the future we healed him, but were still not allowed to leave the castle. In the courtyard we met up with two other members of the resistance, they were Lee Majors and the helicopter guy from Magnum PI. Lee Majors was holding a lyre and the helicopter guy was holding an olde-world double bass.

We did what any cheesy time travel based tv show/film would do in this predicament: we played rock music for the medieval people!

They loved it! They let us go and I woke up.

And that's the short version of the dream.


There are 19 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Mort: there are some dreams that reveal dark secrets about your subconscious personality. And there are some dreams that are just crazy shit for the sake of it.

But this, I believe, is one of the rare dreams that accurately and precisely depicts the future.

<guyPaulo> I had a crappy weekend. the damn government took away my goats...
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Mort> I welcome this future, just because it involves cuddling with Sydney Bristow and listening to the raw lyre rock skills of Lee Majors.
<Lauren> Mort, I have seen the future and can tell you only that Lee Majors is not part of it. Sorry.
<Jellyloo> I have seen an alternate future where everyone is Lee Majors.
<obtuse> I had a dream last week about an alternate dimension where everyone was a motorcycle. We were made out of 3 or 4 components that you could swap out to improve performance. It was kind of like a video game cause we were racing around a big track in the middle of a desert that looked strangely like my elementary school playground.
<Mort> "Being John Malkovich" might actually have been more amusing if it had been "Being Lee Majors".

Obtuse, your dream is reminding me of Automan.

<yoyology> guy, according to that article, you were also probed by the state of Vermont. I imagine that wasn't fun either.
<yoyology> Mort, I'd like to request the Hindu guy buried up to his neck for tomorrow. I've got ideas a-poppin'!
<guyPaulo> Thank you for your concern yoyo. The other monkie's seemed to just ignore my plight...
<Mort> He looks too far down the list to pick for a normal day. I will add him on guest day though.
<Kumiho> Oh dear, guyP. Did it hurt much? And how did you stand the stench?
<Kumiho> Or is that a stupid question to ask the coiner of the term "ED"?
<Kumiho> Is it me, or is the photo really about her assets? (Don't mind me, I just got back from my accounting class.)
<Kumiho> Oh, yeah, the photo....story.news.yahoo.com...
<guyPaulo> T&A is always a driving factor for the yahoo photos.
<mypalmike> Or just T.
<obtuse> Not especially young, supple T either.
<jeffR> Mort that is awesome


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post