[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 03/25/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Master Dinkie, bastard son of Miss Twinkles, detested the creepy movements of flightless birds.

He sent forth Baroness "Hate Skate" Cohen to do his dirty work.

The penguins didn't have a chance.
(Reuters)
(AFP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 216 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:50Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:49Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:47Caption #351
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:44Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:29Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:26Caption #524
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:23Caption #256
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:18Caption #159
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:17Caption #635
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:16Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:15Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:13Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:12Caption #929
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:10Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:59Caption #969
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:57Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:55Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:54Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:53Caption #-48
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:44Caption #122
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:43Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:41Caption #107
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:38Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:35Caption #772
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:30Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:28Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:23Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:20Caption #952
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:19Caption #491
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:17Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:16Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:14Caption #363
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:11Caption #138
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:10Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:07Caption #63
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:04Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:00Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:59Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:47Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:46Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:41Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:40Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:33Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:32Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:28Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:21Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:18Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:15Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:13Caption #872
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:10Caption #329
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:07Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:06Caption #719
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:05Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:04Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:03Caption #833
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:01Caption #887
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:00Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:59Caption #491
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:56Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:55Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:50Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:48Caption #820
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:45Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:40Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:37Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:36Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:35Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:33Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:32Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:31Caption #301
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:30Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:28Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:25Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:24Caption #274
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:23Caption #930
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:22Caption #649
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:20Caption #470
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:19Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:15Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:14Caption #745
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:10Caption #643
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:09Caption #733
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:06Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:05Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:57Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:56Caption #229
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:54Caption #431
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:52Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:51Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:46Caption #583
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:44Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:41Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:40Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:38Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:37Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:36Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:34Caption #503
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:33Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:31Caption #566
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:27Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:26Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:24Caption #794
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:22Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:21Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:20Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:19Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:18Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:16Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:12Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:11Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:08Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:07Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:06Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:57Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:54Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:53Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:52Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:51Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:45Caption #374
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:44Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:42Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:37Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:36Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:35Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:34Caption #634
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:28Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:26Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:21Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:18Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:16Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:15Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:11Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:04Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:03Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:58Caption #327
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:57Caption #872
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:55Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:53Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:52Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:51Caption #851
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:46Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:45Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:43Caption #774
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:39Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:30Caption #923
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:29Caption #353
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:27Caption #271
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:19Caption #870
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:15Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:11Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:10Caption #63
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:00Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:46Caption #802
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:45Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:41Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:39Caption #727
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:38Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:37Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:36Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:32Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:29Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:23Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:18Caption #272
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:13Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:12Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:07Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:06Caption #367
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:04Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:59Caption #322
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:57Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:56Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:55Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:54Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:53Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:52Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:49Caption #631
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:44Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:41Caption #558
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:38Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:36Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:35Caption #534
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:34Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:24Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:22Caption #784
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:21Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:20Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:19Caption #883
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:18Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:12Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:11Caption #732
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:08Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:53Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:51Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:50Caption #521
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:49Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:48Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:47Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:43Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:42Caption #491
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:39Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:38Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:37Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:35Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:34Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:32Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:28Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:25Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:20Caption #849
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:13Caption #-51
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:11Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:05Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:03Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker05:36:01Caption #411
Mr. NonameLurker05:35:58Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker05:35:57Caption #654
Mr. NonameLurker05:35:56Caption #906

Board [Post Message]

Absolute truths, circa 1997


The number of people that die of potato related deaths in Russia per year is higher than the population of Denmark.

The average internet user has 68% less chance of being in a relationship than other people who do not use the internet.

Most people believe that Tuesday is the longest day of the week and Wednesday is the most common day for concieving children.

The spatula was origianlly created as a highly useful torture device in medieval Belgium.

The Oroca Indians of South America are currently the most accomplished human taxidermist.

The common domestic ferret was the first cavity searching device developed by the spanish inquisition.

The average full grown everglades Alligator can consume up to 7 humans in one meal.

Gorillas have enormous nostrils because of large fingers.

The average watch is 18 minutes slow.

The number of people run over by buses in Britain last year is equal to the number of people killed by telephones in Mexico.

Shakespeare was a mutton cook while writing his most famous plays.

Buckingham palace was built on the site of a hamster breeding farm.

The average man breathes 108 times during sex, the average woman breathes 68 times.

The average internet user spends 42% of the time waiting while online.

somewhere.com is the most asked for internet domain.

Norwegian Females are on average 6 inches taller than the average male.

The deep blue Puffer fish can suck harder than the average vacuume cleaner.

The average time to eating is 2 hours and 15 minutes, ie too long.

The last time a human was killed by a penguin was in 1978, his name was Norman "skip" Kriugs.

94% of female Austrians have never seen a men's urinal.

The Pope is required by medieval church canon law to shave his body hair once a year.

It is has been scientifically proved that hair loss is linked to snoring.


There are 18 messages for this day.
<jordie3> No way.
<Popeshaver> I am sorry but the penultimate rumor is true. So sadly true...*sobs*
<Lauren> Tuesday IS the longest day of the week and 42% hourglassing seems about right to me for internet use (but I still use a dial-up connection). Last night I had the opportunity to monitor my own breathing and that of my partner and can tell you that #13 has to be wrong. Although I lost count somewhere around 2,000, I was definitely ahead at that point. The rest seem pretty unrealistic, and I wouldn't have believed them if Popeshaver hadn't confirmed the next to last.
<guyPaulo> Here's an interesting tidbit. The average respitory rate for adults is 12-18 breaths per minute. If you assume twice that rate for sex (24-36, average is 30), then 108/30= 3 minutes 36 seconds is the average time for the average man to have sex.
<Hysterical Woman> 86% percent of people blindly believe in any stats, no matter what the source.
<Jellyloo> 'Stinkopated' is not a word but I think it should be. 96% of doctors agree.
<Mort> What would it mean Jellyloo dear?
<Kumiho> Funny I was sure this photo would make it on today's three pictures.
...story.news.yahoo.com...
I mean, after bottles of 40oz being passed around, it seemed natural.
Or are you forbiding any more monkey pix, Mort?
<Jellyloo> Stinkopated: To suffer a short loss of consciousness due to bad smells?
<guyPaulo> Hopefully, that monkie pic will be saved for the next "Meta Day."
<Mort> I actually can't smell right now, damn allergies.

I didn't even see the monkie pic when I chose the images last night. I hope it does stay for meta day.

<mypalmike> You can smell, and you do.
<Starbug> Over one's lifetime, the average person will eat eight spiders while sleeping.
<guyPaulo> It's saterday night and I'm lit! WHOOOOHH!!!
<Carol> It's Sunday morning, how ya doing now? Did you enjoy the spiders?
Also: mypalmike is giving me bratty-brother flashbacks.
<Mort> I was rudely woken up by the sheriffs' department charity fund asking for donations. My religious beliefs forbid me to give money to anyone who wakes me up while other people are in church.
I mean if you can't enjoy sleeping in on Sunday while others are sitting uncomfortably getting sermon'D to, then where's the fun in being atheist?
<obtuse> 
<obtuse> Er. I was going to scold guy for doing the web-equivalent of drunk-dialing, but I'm probably in much the same state right now. Hence the double post. Peace out, granola dome.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post