Most Emailed Photos

Most Emailed Photos - WHAT I DID OVER THE WEEKEND DAY - 03/14/2004

by Mort

<-- First

Choose an alternative caption: >

Last -->-->

What I did over the weekend by Mort
I spent my day like I spend most of my free days: at the botanical gardens.
The gardener Ulga -- her foul hygine was only surpassed by her gardening prowess -- asked if flowers reminded me of women's parts.

I replied that I had never actually had the chance to view a woman's 'private region'.
She laughed and dragged me heavily to the shadows behind the potting shed. I stood, my mouth agape, as she lifted up her rough skirt and showed me beneath. 'First you must rid me of my pests.' she said.
I grimaced as I plucked mites one by one from their hairy nest, and squashed their heads between my fingers.

I spent the rest of the weekend trying to coax a family of apes out of her ass.

(AP)

(Reuters)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.

History

These 5 things happened most recently.

Mr. Noname Lurker 15:05:46 drooled over #54

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:46 drooled over #666

Mr. Noname Lurker 13:52:24 drooled over #76

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:51:51 drooled over #102

Mr. Noname Lurker 09:22:14 drooled over #555

Current Users

There have been 370 users in the last 10 minutes.

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:29 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:28 Caption #318

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:25 Caption #674

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:21 Caption #72

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:20 Caption #134

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:19 Caption #800

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:18 Caption #53

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:17 Caption #458

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:16 Caption #109

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:15 Caption #727

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:14 Caption #408

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:13 Caption #570

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:12 Caption #316

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:10 Caption #85

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:09 Caption #171

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:05 Caption #901

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:04 Caption #20

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:02 Caption #399

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:01 Caption #886

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:26:00 Caption #926

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:58 Caption #662

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:57 Caption #369

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:55 Caption #675

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:53 Caption #374

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:49 Caption #975

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:47 Caption #451

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:45 Caption #586

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:43 Caption #265

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:42 Caption #269

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:40 Caption #115

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:39 Caption #268

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:38 Caption #131

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:37 Caption #471

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:36 Caption #423

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:33 Caption #82

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:30 Caption #783

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:28 Caption #785

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:26 Caption #20

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:25 Caption #691

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:21 Caption #362

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:19 Caption #54

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:17 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:13 Caption #592

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:11 Caption #202

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:09 Caption #445

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:08 Caption #411

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:05 Caption #138

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:04 Caption #911

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:03 Caption #32

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:01 Caption #18

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:25:00 Caption #371

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:59 Caption #793

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:58 Caption #4

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:57 Caption #599

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:54 Caption #388

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:53 Caption #232

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:51 Caption #318

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:49 Caption #540

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:48 Caption #84

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:45 Caption #418

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:42 Caption #792

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:41 Caption #520

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:40 Caption #117

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:37 Caption #72

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:36 Caption #665

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:35 Caption #375

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:34 Caption #579

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:33 Caption #287

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:32 Caption #975

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:31 Caption #453

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:30 Caption #581

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:29 Caption #440

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:28 Caption #337

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:27 Caption #466

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:26 Caption #378

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:25 Caption #353

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:24 Caption #205

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:22 Caption #139

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:21 Caption #560

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:19 Caption #468

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:17 Caption #241

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:13 Caption #-20

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:09 Caption #606

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:08 Caption #555

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:07 Caption #644

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:06 Caption #138

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:05 Caption #294

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:04 Caption #627

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:03 Caption #649

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:02 Caption #186

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:24:01 Caption #204

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:57 Caption #608

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:54 Caption #39

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:53 Caption #264

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:50 Caption #15

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:49 Caption #561

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:48 Caption #579

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:46 Caption #137

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:44 Caption #592

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:42 Caption #117

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:41 Caption #509

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:37 Caption #6

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:36 Caption #586

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:34 Caption #361

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:33 Caption #719

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:29 Caption #498

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:28 Caption #181

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:27 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:26 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:25 Caption #252

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:21 Caption #85

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:17 Caption #105

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:14 Caption #329

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:12 Caption #977

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:11 Caption #644

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:10 Caption #116

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:09 Caption #339

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:08 Caption #982

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:07 Caption #155

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:06 Caption #23

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:05 Caption #348

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:02 Caption #715

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:01 Caption #589

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:57 Caption #327

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:53 Caption #457

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:51 Caption #257

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:49 Caption #272

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:43 Caption #93

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:42 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:41 Caption #310

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:40 Caption #615

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:38 Caption #309

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:37 Caption #837

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:33 Caption #226

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:30 Caption #485

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:29 Caption #631

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:28 Caption #184

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:27 Caption #-11

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:26 Caption #364

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:25 Caption #877

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:24 Caption #259

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:22 Caption #28

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:21 Caption #-17

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:20 Caption #388

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:18 Caption #253

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:17 Caption #701

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:16 Caption #963

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:15 Caption #781

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:13 Caption #824

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:10 Caption #499

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:09 Caption #313

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:08 Caption #890

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:05 Caption #530

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:02 Caption #506

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:22:00 Caption #158

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:59 Caption #249

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:58 Caption #221

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:57 Caption #671

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:53 Caption #758

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:51 Caption #329

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:45 Caption #321

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:44 Caption #774

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:43 Caption #137

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:42 Caption #13

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:41 Caption #21

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:37 Caption #599

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:36 Caption #66

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:35 Caption #24

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:34 Caption #755

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:33 Caption #8

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:30 Caption #216

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:27 Caption #920

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:26 Caption #479

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:25 Caption #460

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:24 Caption #802

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:23 Caption #960

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:22 Caption #73

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:21 Caption #562

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:20 Caption #230

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:19 Caption #353

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:17 Caption #352

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:16 Caption #42

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:15 Caption #11

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:14 Caption #46

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:09 Caption #270

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:08 Caption #883

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:06 Caption #442

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:05 Caption #370

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:04 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:03 Caption #692

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:02 Caption #969

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:01 Caption #78

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:21:00 Caption #82

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:59 Caption #826

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:58 Caption #68

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:57 Caption #649

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:56 Caption #140

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:55 Caption #509

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:54 Caption #522

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:53 Caption #668

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:50 Caption #10

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:48 Caption #192

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:46 Caption #438

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:43 Caption #55

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:42 Caption #586

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:41 Caption #544

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:37 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:36 Caption #238

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:35 Caption #722

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:34 Caption #379

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:33 Caption #448

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:32 Caption #747

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:31 Caption #745

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:30 Caption #249

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:29 Caption #752

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:26 Caption #354

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:25 Caption #0

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:24 Caption #250

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:22 Caption #783

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:19 Caption #546

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:18 Caption #656

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:16 Caption #69

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:15 Caption #906

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:14 Caption #126

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:12 Caption #609

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:11 Caption #920

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:10 Caption #145

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:05 Caption #84

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:04 Caption #641

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:02 Caption #650

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:01 Caption #78

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:20:00 Caption #680

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:58 Caption #833

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:55 Caption #286

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:53 Caption #367

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:51 Caption #210

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:50 Caption #13

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:49 Caption #3

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:46 Caption #704

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:45 Caption #572

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:44 Caption #948

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:42 Caption #619

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:40 Caption #234

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:39 Caption #49

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:38 Caption #729

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:36 Caption #37

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:34 Caption #131

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:30 Caption #169

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:26 Caption #779

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:25 Caption #459

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:24 Caption #304

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:23 Caption #277

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:22 Caption #505

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:21 Caption #816

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:19 Caption #968

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:18 Caption #172

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:17 Caption #33

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:16 Caption #608

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:14 Caption #26

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:12 Caption #489

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:10 Caption #7

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:06 Caption #739

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:05 Caption #548

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:04 Caption #673

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:03 Caption #211

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:19:01 Caption #406

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:59 Caption #12

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:58 Caption #747

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:57 Caption #558

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:56 Caption #365

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:55 Caption #493

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:54 Caption #284

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:53 Caption #106

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:52 Caption #389

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:51 Caption #772

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:50 Caption #666

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:49 Caption #862

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:48 Caption #38

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:47 Caption #163

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:45 Caption #319

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:44 Caption #611

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:42 Caption #761

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:39 Caption #683

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:38 Caption #405

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:36 Caption #424

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:35 Caption #386

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:34 Caption #694

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:30 Caption #726

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:29 Caption #823

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:28 Caption #133

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:27 Caption #299

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:26 Caption #581

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:24 Caption #145

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:22 Caption #555

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:18 Caption #618

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:17 Caption #754

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:16 Caption #897

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:15 Caption #773

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:14 Caption #22

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:13 Caption #-34

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:11 Caption #106

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:10 Caption #165

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:07 Caption #581

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:03 Caption #354

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:18:02 Caption #549

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:59 Caption #79

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:57 Caption #581

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:56 Caption #618

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:55 Caption #354

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:54 Caption #921

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:53 Caption #574

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:52 Caption #576

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:50 Caption #236

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:49 Caption #500

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:48 Caption #387

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:46 Caption #244

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:45 Caption #607

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:44 Caption #484

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:42 Caption #394

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:40 Caption #806

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:39 Caption #796

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:38 Caption #600

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:37 Caption #176

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:36 Caption #343

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:35 Caption #731

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:34 Caption #14

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:33 Caption #572

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:32 Caption #141

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:31 Caption #950

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:30 Caption #7

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:29 Caption #370

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:28 Caption #691

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:27 Caption #402

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:26 Caption #753

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:23 Caption #728

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:20 Caption #368

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:18 Caption #448

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:15 Caption #314

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:14 Caption #110

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:12 Caption #897

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:07 Caption #103

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:06 Caption #648

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:05 Caption #252

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:03 Caption #30

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:02 Caption #812

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:17:00 Caption #215

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:59 Caption #-74

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:58 Caption #1

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:56 Caption #620

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:55 Caption #200

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:54 Caption #273

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:50 Caption #446

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:46 Caption #550

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:45 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:44 Caption #556

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:43 Caption #777

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:42 Caption #586

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:41 Caption #179

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:40 Caption #-75

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:39 Caption #523

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:38 Caption #569

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:37 Caption #354

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:36 Caption #884

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:35 Caption #753

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:34 Caption #498

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:33 Caption #469

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:32 Caption #-69

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:31 Caption #374

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:30 Caption #713

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:16:29 Caption #854

Board

[Post Message]

As you might have noticed: I have switched the theme day from Thursday to Monday, to better balance the week. If you are confused, let me remind you that today is Monday and not Thursday, although I wish it was not so...

The object of this theme: Write about your weekend in such a way to match the images and hopefully entertain.

What actually happened this weekend.

It's odd that a voice, or a word said in certain way, can bring back memories quicker than anything else. You hear a familar voice across a crowded room, someone you have not heard in years; and the feelings you had at your last meeting come back to you like a deep unstoppable current.

This weekend it happened to me. The format was a dream: A telephone rang twice, I picked it up, she asked "hello?", I answered "hi", then a meaninful silence that lasted a minute before waking me up.

I shook it off, pushed back the feeling and the memories that the sound of her voice in my dream invoked. In the morning I woke to the sounds of an actual phone ringing, just like my dream I picked it up and asked "Hello?". Just like my dream: silence. This time I could nothing to stop the painful memories and emotions, from spreading like jaundice from the blight buried deep within my kidney.

It was a weekend, like this one past, but two years ago. Driving home at night, she fed me chocolate covered Poki that we had just bought from the Japanese supermarket. She was wearing the thick, woolen, white sweater that I had just bought her from the gap, singing along to The Smiths: girlfriend in a coma, which had just started to play on the radio.

My memory then becomes a slideshow, bright shots etched in forever with nothing in between: A dog running in the street, her hand pointing, my white knuckles on the wheel, the pole. Then just voices, audio catching up with the video: "breathe into the mask", "we're going to take her out first", "try to stay calm", "bring the cutters here".

Then I remember waking up deathly cold, shaking. With blurred vision I recognized the inside of an ambulance, the shaking was not me but the ambulance rushing through the streets to it's destination. I looked to my left and saw someone else in the other cot. I was a stranger, she wore a red sweater and had white hair. I wondered if I had hit her with my car, I thought it was strange that she should be in the same ambulance as me.

"Your girlfriends in a coma", the ambulance man said when he noticed my eyes were open.

"She's not my girlfriend!" I replied curtly. I looked back at her again, my eyes seeing clearly now, her hair was not white it was bandages, and her sweater was not red, it was soaked with blood -- her blood. "She's my wife." I stammered before passing out.

When I came around again I was surrounded by doctors and nurses. I looked again to my left, through the double doors of the emergency room I saw my wife lying on a cart, all alone. I wondered why they were bothering so much with me, when she was more obviously hurt. I began to ask them to leave me alone and attend to her instead, but a nurse put a mask over my face and a doctor said "take him to OR".

When I woke I was in a recovery room, a surgeon was reading my chart, and talking to me like I could understand. He told me I had been very lucky, that I should have died, that they had to remove both of my kidneys, that I had a very rare blood type, that I was fortunate that they had found a donor that could give me a kidney and three pints of blood. I asked him about my wife, he said he was sorry but she had passed away as soon as she reached the hospital. I became angry, I told him that I was sorry they had let me live. He replied that it was my wife that had let me live, it was she who carried the donor card, it was her kidneys that were now in my body.

This is why her voice even in a dream affects me so, she is part of me now, I have no chance of letting her go.

There are 19 messages for this day.

<Eggs Ackley> How about Mort's Now Gone Totally Mental Day?

<Mark> I recommend Scotch. Seriously.

<Mark> I just read Mort's entry on the pics.

I think I'm going to have the Scotch now ..

<guyPaulo> I'm having a hard time with these photo's today....

<Pedro Gonzales> It's a tranquil monday here today, very quiet. Pretty relaxing

<Mort> Oops sorry, must stop huffing Kool-Aid.

<Kumiho> Um... does this mean Mrs. Mort (aka Morticia) is no more?

<Kumiho> Hey Lauren, here's your chance!

<guyPaulo> I hope this photo is on MEP tomorrow:
...story.news.yahoo.com...

<Mort> I hope this one does more:
...us.news2.yimg.com...
Morticia is very well thank you very much, it's just a story.
All characters are fictional, any resemblence to real persons, past of present, is purely coincidental.

<guyPaulo> "You hope"? I thought YOU were the cruel overlord who dictates the context of our lives by judiciously selecting the photos to put up here, Mort. Are you telling us that someone else is really pullings the strings behind the MEP curtain?

<Cookieus Hackus> Really, I get up pretty early (eastern USA time) and the photo selection here usually bears little to no resemblance to the actual top 3 at yahoo, so I always assumed there was a lot of lattitude in the selection process. :)

<Mort> There is a whole day's lattitude with the selection of the photos. I also try to cut down the number of duplicates now.

<Cookieus Hackus> I wasn't complaining, BTW. It's always interesting to see what ones make the cut.

<Kumiho> I thank you for the reduced number of repeats myself.

<Mort> I think I messed up the 3rd image today. There is a subtle art to picking the right images, I am on the cusp of understanding.

<guyPaulo> If I might venture a guess Mort, I think that the combination of a theme day with the very specific nature of the first two photos led to a slow day so far today. Its hard to write about what you did over the weekend involving a plant and a bat. We can always throw in a "monkie" joke at the end, so I don't think the 3rd photo was the problem.

<obtuse> Theme day + similar images = difficult

Even without theme day, three images with similarity (nature) doesn't leave much room for creative improvisation.

<Kumiho> eh, it's only hard to write captions if you haven't got at least one pix of a half naked chick/beefcake.

Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post