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Most Emailed Photos - 05/23/2004 by David Byrden
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"I'm your President and I'm a fundamentalist Christian. I don't believe in Evolution.

You can't make me believe that something as stupid and ugly as THIS..."


"..is related to something as smart and beautiful as ME!"

"It's just a crazy, unsupportable story!"


[munch] Yeah... kinda like WMD, cousin George?
(AFP)
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(AFP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


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Comments on Alternatives [Add Comment]

There are 22 comments for this caption.

<guyPaulo> This would be a lot more funny if I hadn't found out Friday that out of the five people in my office, I'm the ONLY one who believes in evolution.
<David Byrden> Ah, but Guy, it's not a question of "belief". It's a plain fact that evolution is the only explanation we've got that fits the evidence.
<guyPaulo> Any chance of you giving a pro-evolution presentation at our next staff meeting, DB? Apparently, I'm a godless infidel who has been corrupted by the world. I'm thinking of wearing horns and carrying a pitchfork to my next performance evaluation.
<ElvisThePelvis> Where do work that they allow you to be discriminated against for your scientific views? A bible-factory? The NRA? The U.S. Governement?
<guyPaulo> Oh, I'm definitely not discriminated against. I just like to bitch and moan. I'm actually in the non-profit (charity) field, which is somewhat dominated by religious groups and individuals.

It's not like there's a lot of secular organizations in America trying to take care of the poor and feed the hungry.

<ElvisThePelvis> Ah...why is the charity field dominated by the religious? I am not religious in any way shape or form, but I help several charities and it seems through casual observation that I am in the minority.
<3Suns> Oh c'mon guyP. Show me one place in the Bible where it says that humans were descended from monkies. Just one.
<ElvisThePelvis> In the bible, a great fictional history book, it says that animals were created before man in genesis.
<Mort> Der 3Suns!

Cheater beget Bubbles
Bubbles beget Adam
.
.
.
Joseph beget Jesus

<ElvisThePelvis> I love when the begeting begins...
<guyPaulo> Maybe I can get a little begeting tonight....
<Kumiho> naw, begating is what comes after nookie, not the other way around. Although I always found it interesting that apparently the begating was a-sexual in that part of Genisis.
<David Byrden> Guy, I can present only one argument in favor of evolution: "Why would you trust a book instead of physical evidence?"
At which point, religious people tend to get very upset.
<3Suns> Kumi: Abel, Zillah, Tubalcain, and all them were just metaphors for amoebae anyhow. Of course they begat asexually.
<Kumiho> But of course. ::grins:: Standardized religion always seemed silly to me anyhow.
<Mort> I agree Kumiho it gets silly when someone says "the power of your Buddha is only 200 millijesus".
<Kumiho> ::rolling hysterically on the floor:: good lordy I have got to remember that for the next family picnic.
<guyPaulo> Sadly, DB, it's a bit more complex than that. Creationists believe that while human are fallible, god is not. Therefore, science is prone to mistakes, while the bible (as written by god) is perfect. When science and the bible disagree, God wins over man.

Never mind that 99.9% of the evidence points to evolution. The fact that science COULD be wrong about something means that the Creationists will reject it outright (when it conflicts with their holy handbook).

<David Byrden> Guy: the obvious reply is, why do you think God wrote this book?
<Axolotl> I teach college classes in evolutionary biology. I think you have to look at creationism and evolution from the perspective for what they're good for.

Creationism is useful for reinforcing your belief system and personal ideology.

Evolutionary theory is useful for asking and answering questions in biology.

<3Suns> Kumiho, your beauty is rated at 2.4 centihelens. That is, your face could launch 240 ships.

GWB is rated at -2 helens. 2000 ships fled to Iraq to escape his ugly mug.

<David Byrden> My take on it: they tackle the problem of origins from different assumptions.
Creationism: we trust the Bible.
Evolution: we trust the evidence.
"trusting the evidence" is another name for Science.

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