[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos CRASS DAY! - 02/18/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Dastardly Black Holes are destroying our universe!

As we speak they are Sucking up important matter for their own devious means.

The Black Holes are destroying everything precious!

No one is safe!

"Dude settle down! I'm just searching for your black hole!"
(AP)
(AP)
(Reuters)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 267 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:20Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:19Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:18Caption #98
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:17Caption #151
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:16Caption #331
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:15Caption #89
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:14Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:13Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:12Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:11Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:08Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker15:04:01Caption #157
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:56Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:54Caption #301
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:53Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:47Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:41Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:36Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:31Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:30Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:25Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:20Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:17Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:16Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:12Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:11Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:09Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:05Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:02Caption #678
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:01Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker15:03:00Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:58Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:56Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:55Caption #786
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:54Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:53Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:51Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:49Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:37Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:34Caption #282
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:31Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:28Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:23Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:18Caption #755
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:12Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:07Caption #847
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:05Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:04Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:02Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker15:02:00Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:59Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:57Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:54Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:53Caption #762
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:52Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:51Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:47Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:46Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:38Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:37Caption #894
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:36Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:35Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:34Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:33Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:31Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:29Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:27Caption #947
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:25Caption #754
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:24Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:22Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:20Caption #737
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:19Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:18Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:16Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:15Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:13Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:11Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:10Caption #956
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:09Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:07Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:05Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:04Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:02Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker15:01:00Caption #846
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:58Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:56Caption #840
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:55Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:53Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:52Caption #489
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:51Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:49Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:48Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:47Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:46Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:44Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:43Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:42Caption #838
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:41Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:40Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:39Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:38Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:37Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:36Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:35Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:33Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:31Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:30Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:28Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:26Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:24Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:22Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:21Caption #630
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:19Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:17Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:16Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:15Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:14Caption #117
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:13Caption #490
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:12Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:11Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:10Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:09Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:08Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:07Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:06Caption #875
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:05Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:03Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:01Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker15:00:00Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:59Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:58Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:56Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:54Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:52Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:50Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:47Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:44Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:42Caption #471
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:41Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:38Caption #534
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:37Caption #867
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:36Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:36Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:32Caption #487
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:31Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:30Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:29Caption #941
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:26Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:16Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:15Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:13Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:12Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:11Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:10Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:09Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:05Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker14:59:03Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:59Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:53Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:50Caption #157
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:49Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:46Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:45Caption #765
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:41Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:36Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:34Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:24Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:23Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:20Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:19Caption #803
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:18Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:13Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:12Caption #797
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:11Caption #-16
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:09Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:08Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:07Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:03Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:02Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:01Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker14:58:00Caption #337
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:57Caption #879
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:55Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:53Caption #955
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:49Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:47Caption #117
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:44Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:35Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:31Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:28Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:27Caption #692
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:26Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:22Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:19Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:13Caption #688
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:12Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:11Caption #638
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:08Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:07Caption #655
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:06Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:05Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:04Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:03Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker14:57:02Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:54Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:53Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:52Caption #272
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:46Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:45Caption #859
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:44Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:41Caption #97
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:37Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:36Caption #224
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:31Caption #401
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:30Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:29Caption #926
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:28Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:26Caption #524
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:25Caption #609
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:23Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:16Caption #544
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:15Caption #353
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:14Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:11Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:10Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:09Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:06Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:05Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:04Caption #647
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:02Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:01Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker14:56:00Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:53Caption #954
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:49Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:48Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:47Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:46Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:44Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:39Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:38Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:37Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:32Caption #276
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:31Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:30Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:28Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:23Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:17Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:09Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:04Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:03Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:02Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker14:55:00Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:55Caption #799
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:47Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:45Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:41Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:37Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:36Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:35Caption #89
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:32Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:31Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:30Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:28Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:26Caption #773
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:22Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:21Caption #224
Mr. NonameLurker14:54:20Caption #459

Board [Post Message]

"You're not funny anymore!" She said disapprovingly, "You just make crass jokes."

Well I guess I should make it CRASS DAY then. We're all adults here, right? Well not emotionally, but in years we are.

I was going to do a different theme day, a competition of sorts, but heck whats wrong with a bit of "lower" humour?

Everyone is so prudish, uptight and politically correct these days. Lets bring an end to the reign of conservatism. The fight starts here.

Vote for the MEP party in 2004!


Oops, sorry for that weird tangent there, I got kinda excited.


There are 51 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> OK. If the 3:30am experiment goes well, I will make later appearances. So, anyone on the West Coast: I'll be bottom center, leaning over the bridge with a yellow bag.

...www.ireland.com...

<David Byrden> My second appearance will be at 1am EST. But I'll be offline until 3am EST.
<MLimburg> If anyone finds him, make sure you grab a screen cap :)
<MLimburg> Well, I finally found a picture of me on my machine .. so I guess my orkut profile is now complete.
<mypalmike> Isn't every day really "crass day"?
<infosponge> it must be nice, being in that elite circle of orkut-ians.
<mypalmike> Info, I can invite you. Just email me at misscleocallmenow at yahoo. (Hey, it's my 3rd tier "spamfest" email account).
<Pedro Gonzales> I'm sure glad I read over the board again. I was going to write a nice caption about cress and other such salad plants. That woulda been embarassing...
<guyPaulo> Oh man, "CRASS DAY", also known as "Thursday" for me and Elvis.
<ElvisThePelvis> Yes, indeed.
<Pedro Gonzales> Crass Day has brought out the best in everyone- MEP gets my vote in '04 Mort
<yoyology> Just to make sure we're clear, dictionary.com has this definition of "crass":

So crude and unrefined as to be lacking in discrimination and sensibility.

...dictionary.reference.com...

Amusingly, it seems to also be an acronym for the Cheese Racing Association. ...www.apsmithadsl.plus.com...

<Mort> Ironically CRASS DAY, happened to be the day that Infinity Radio (huge corporate radio show owners), decided to ban all sexually related radio segments.

Which means that "Ralph's Sex University", had it's last show today on KROQ. It's a segment with a sexually related theme each week, were people can phone in for help and education, as well as being damn amusing.

I keep wondering if this is a backlash from the Janet Jackson debacle.

It's just another stupid step in the wrong direction. I really wish we could buy our once beloved radio stations back.

<Lauren> Cheese racing, indeed! Those Brits are just plain weird.
<Lauren> INFOSPONGE: Please let me invite you. You can contact me at forguypauloonly at aol. Please, please. I want to invite someone.
<Lauren> Hey, where's Roger? Today's theme seems right up his alley; it's not like him to miss an opportunity to be crass...
<guyPaulo> I hope everyone who thinks that it's ME stalking LAUREN will see that her email is "FORGUYPAULOONLY(at)AOL" Yep, I'm teh sexy......go me, go me.....
<Mort> I like how that email address contains the word "LOON".
<Mort> I got a little silver Mini iPod today! Hurrar!!
<Jellyloo> grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
<Mort> Ha ha ha ha, you don't have one!! I do HA HA!
<Jellyloo> Evil laugh. Check. Funny villian hair. Check. Deformed by madness. Check...

YOU HAVE IT ALL!

<Mort> Dang, how did you know I was deformed by madness? I never leave my mad scientist lair.
<Jellyloo your X10 factory rep> For years, X10 has designed and manufactured cutting edge home automation & surveillance technology. By ordering FACTORY DIRECT from X10 - you get unbeatable low prices from a name you can TRUST!
<guyPaulo> Mort, are you going to pick a winner for crass day, or is it just an open forum? Do we need to pull out the big guns and go for super-crass?
<Lauren> guy, please don't do it. There is no way to work explosive diarrhea into these three photos. Please, I beg you, stop and think before you try to stretch the envelope here.
<Mort> Mort replies to guy as he peers around for hidden cameras...

I didn't intend it to be a competition. I ain't stopping you from pulling out the big guns and going super-crass. I think thats the point of the day.

Mort pounces on an oddly placed book.

Damn no camera there.

If you want it to be a competition then I select you as grand Poohbah Judger.

<ajiav> orkut still hates me.
<Lauren> e-mail me and I'll invite you back, ajiav.
<guyPaulo> I don't think that even devoted regs like myself should ever judge captions. That's a priviledge reserved for Image Gorillas, not lowly monkies. Its probably best not to select a winner anyway.

And Lauren dear, if there is a way to work the diarrhea angle in, then I will find it. Oh yes, I will find it...

<Lauren> Funny thing is, guy, I thought I had with my last caption, until I realized it sounded more like bulemia....
<Mort> I'm never gonna know you now, but I'm gonna love you anyhow.
<3Suns> That's the second reference today to a song from Good Will Hunting. What gives?
<Jellyloo> What was the first reference?
<Mort> So it is, maybe it's a sub theme...

...www.mostemailed.com...

<Jellyloo> Now I too, have been infected with that song! I am not sure if it beats 'Killing Me Softly With His Song' by Roberta Flack though.
<Mort> Damn you, Jelly loo.

I am infected by both songs, and they sound like the devil, when mixed together.

<guyPaulo> What are some other ideas for Theme Days? I saw "controvercial day" somewhere. How about "Pun day, "sexual innuendo day," or "meta day."
<Mort> I have a clever idea for next week, but I need to iron out the ripples. Also it will mean one less long senseless rant to make.
<3Suns> I think next week's should be "Not Crass Day". That would really force us to get creative...
<David Byrden> Did NOBODY see me on the webcam????
<Lauren> Sorry, David. I got all confused about the time differential. Can you do it again tomorrow? And can you tell us what time it is where you are as well as what time it will be where we are?
<David Byrden> OK! I will be on camera at 5am EST = midnight PST.
I will reappear at noon EST = 9am PST.
<Carol> Hooray! I will try harder and try to save pictures! (I didn't know if my husband would understand my getting up in the middle of the night for this, but he should know by now to expect some oddity, I guess.)
Wouldn't 5 am EST be 2 am PST? Please clarify.
<David Byrden> Dammit yes, those times are wrong.
OK, I will appear at midnight PST and again at 2pm EST.

David

<Carol> Okay, now I'm more confused! Is this right:
First: 3 am EST = 2 am CST = 1 am MST = 12 midnight PST
Second: 2 pm EST = 1 pm CST = 12 noon MST = 11 am PST
(... or are you in Dublin at all!)
<mypalmike> Is MST "Mort Standard Time"?
<David Byrden> Yes, those are the times I will try for. Perhaps your one and only chance to see a man standing in the street.
<Carol> Hahaha ... yes, I am setting my alarm clock for the rare opportunity of a blurry glimpse of someone I've never met, on a bridge in Dublin ...
<Carol> Mort Standard Time travels with Mort, I believe.
<Carol> I like 3Suns' idea of Not Crass Day! As if anyone is still reading here.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post