[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - WHAT I DID OVER THE WEEKEND DAY - 03/14/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

What I did over the weekend by Mort
I spent my day like I spend most of my free days: at the botanical gardens.
The gardener Ulga -- her foul hygine was only surpassed by her gardening prowess -- asked if flowers reminded me of women's parts.

I replied that I had never actually had the chance to view a woman's 'private region'.
She laughed and dragged me heavily to the shadows behind the potting shed. I stood, my mouth agape, as she lifted up her rough skirt and showed me beneath. 'First you must rid me of my pests.' she said.
I grimaced as I plucked mites one by one from their hairy nest, and squashed their heads between my fingers.

I spent the rest of the weekend trying to coax a family of apes out of her ass.
(AP)
(AP)
(Reuters)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 552 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:50Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:49Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:48Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:47Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:46Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:45Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:44Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:43Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:42Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:41Caption #586
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:40Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:38Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:34Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:33Caption #719
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:32Caption #866
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:30Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:29Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:28Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:27Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:26Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:25Caption #863
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:24Caption #725
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:23Caption #571
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:22Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:21Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:20Caption #646
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:19Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:18Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:17Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:16Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:15Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:14Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:13Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:12Caption #435
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:11Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:10Caption #879
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:09Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:08Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:07Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:06Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:05Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:04Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:03Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:02Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:01Caption #678
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:00Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:59Caption #851
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:58Caption #932
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:57Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:56Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:55Caption #649
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:54Caption #186
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:53Caption #237
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:52Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:51Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:50Caption #809
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:49Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:48Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:47Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:46Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:45Caption #875
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:44Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:43Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:41Caption #806
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:40Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:39Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:38Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:37Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:36Caption #478
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:35Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:34Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:33Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:32Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:31Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:30Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:29Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:28Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:27Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:26Caption #588
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:25Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:24Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:23Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:22Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:21Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:20Caption #89
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:19Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:18Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:17Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:16Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:15Caption #834
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:14Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:13Caption #926
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:12Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:11Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:10Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:09Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:08Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:07Caption #242
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:06Caption #949
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:05Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:04Caption #982
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:03Caption #848
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:02Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:01Caption #659
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:00Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:59Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:58Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:57Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:55Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:54Caption #67
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:53Caption #652
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:52Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:51Caption #470
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:50Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:49Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:47Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:46Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:45Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:44Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:43Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:42Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:41Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:40Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:39Caption #900
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:38Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:37Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:36Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:35Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:34Caption #67
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:33Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:32Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:31Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:30Caption #377
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:29Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:28Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:27Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:26Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:25Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:24Caption #557
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:23Caption #748
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:22Caption #449
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:21Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:20Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:19Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:18Caption #954
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:17Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:16Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:15Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:14Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:13Caption #996
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:12Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:11Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:10Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:09Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:08Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:07Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:06Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:05Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:04Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:03Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:02Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:01Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker17:25:00Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:59Caption #82
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:58Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:57Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:56Caption #806
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:55Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:54Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:53Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:52Caption #186
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:51Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:50Caption #241
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:49Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:47Caption #719
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:46Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:45Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:44Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:43Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:42Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:41Caption #758
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:40Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:39Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:38Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:37Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:36Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:35Caption #949
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:34Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:33Caption #810
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:32Caption #388
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:31Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:30Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:29Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:28Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:27Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:26Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:25Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:24Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:23Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:22Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:21Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:20Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:19Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:18Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:17Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:16Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:15Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:14Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:13Caption #930
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:12Caption #352
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:11Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:10Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:09Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:08Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:07Caption #758
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:06Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:05Caption #783
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:04Caption #915
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:03Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:02Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:01Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker17:24:00Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:59Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:58Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:57Caption #367
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:56Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:55Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:53Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:52Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:51Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:50Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:49Caption #540
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:48Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:47Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:46Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:45Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:44Caption #909
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:43Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:42Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:41Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:40Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:39Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:38Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:37Caption #237
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:36Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:35Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:34Caption #817
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:33Caption #631
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:32Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:31Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:30Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:29Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:28Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:27Caption #-31
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:26Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:25Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:24Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:23Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:22Caption #571
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:21Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:20Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:19Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:18Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:17Caption #894
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:16Caption #456
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:15Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:14Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:13Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:12Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:11Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:10Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:09Caption #501
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:08Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:07Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:06Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:05Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:04Caption #309
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:03Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:02Caption #765
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:01Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker17:23:00Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:59Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:58Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:57Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:56Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:55Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:54Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:53Caption #626
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:52Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:51Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:50Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:49Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:48Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:47Caption #479
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:45Caption #491
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:44Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:43Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:42Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:41Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:40Caption #215
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:39Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:38Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:36Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:35Caption #959
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:34Caption #842
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:33Caption #471
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:32Caption #829
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:31Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:30Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:29Caption #657
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:28Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:27Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:26Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:25Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:24Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:23Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:22Caption #838
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:21Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:20Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:19Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:18Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:17Caption #630
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:16Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:15Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:14Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:13Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:12Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:11Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:10Caption #-42
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:09Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:08Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:07Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:06Caption #417
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:05Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:04Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:03Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:02Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:01Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker17:22:00Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:59Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:58Caption #374
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:57Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:56Caption #842
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:54Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:53Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:52Caption #912
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:51Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:50Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:49Caption #493
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:48Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:47Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:46Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:45Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:44Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:43Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:42Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:41Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:40Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:39Caption #626
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:38Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:37Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:36Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:35Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:34Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:33Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:32Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:31Caption #662
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:30Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:29Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:28Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:27Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:25Caption #215
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:24Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:23Caption #727
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:22Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:21Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:20Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:18Caption #792
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:17Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:16Caption #428
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:15Caption #405
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:14Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:13Caption #905
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:12Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:11Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:10Caption #639
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:09Caption #865
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:08Caption #692
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:07Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:06Caption #887
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:05Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:04Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:03Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:02Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:01Caption #643
Mr. NonameLurker17:21:00Caption #323
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:59Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:58Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:57Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:56Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:55Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:54Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:53Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:52Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:51Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:50Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:49Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:48Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:47Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:46Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:45Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:44Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:43Caption #927
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:42Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:41Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:40Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:39Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:38Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:37Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:36Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:35Caption #314
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:34Caption #783
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:33Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:31Caption #928
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:30Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:29Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:28Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:27Caption #745
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:26Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:25Caption #528
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:23Caption #478
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:22Caption #784
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:21Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:20Caption #929
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:19Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:18Caption #582
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:17Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:16Caption #138
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:15Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:14Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:13Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:12Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:11Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:10Caption #662
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:09Caption #243
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:08Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:07Caption #930
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:06Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:05Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:04Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:03Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:02Caption #685
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:01Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker17:20:00Caption #107
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:59Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:58Caption #243
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:57Caption #586
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:56Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:55Caption #930
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:54Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:53Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:52Caption #758
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:51Caption #748
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:50Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:49Caption #873
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:48Caption #107
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:47Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:46Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:45Caption #186
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:44Caption #787
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:43Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:42Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:41Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:39Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:38Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:37Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:36Caption #456
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:35Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:34Caption #479
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:33Caption #788
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:32Caption #788
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:31Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:30Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:29Caption #281
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:28Caption #301
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:27Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:26Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:25Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:24Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:23Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:22Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:21Caption #865
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:20Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:19Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:18Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:17Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:16Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:15Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:14Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:13Caption #117
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:12Caption #505
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:11Caption #550
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:10Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:09Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:08Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:07Caption #866
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:06Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:04Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:03Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:02Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:01Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:19:00Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:59Caption #331
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:57Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:56Caption #-64
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:55Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:54Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:53Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:50Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:49Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:46Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:45Caption #486
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:43Caption #831
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:41Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:38Caption #854
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:36Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:35Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:33Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:30Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:25Caption #532
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:22Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:21Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:18Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:17Caption #337
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:16Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:15Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:14Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:13Caption #265
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:12Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:11Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:10Caption #489
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:09Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:05Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:03Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker17:18:01Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker17:17:59Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker17:17:58Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker17:17:55Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker17:17:53Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker17:17:52Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker17:17:51Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker17:17:50Caption #709

Board [Post Message]

As you might have noticed: I have switched the theme day from Thursday to Monday, to better balance the week. If you are confused, let me remind you that today is Monday and not Thursday, although I wish it was not so...

The object of this theme: Write about your weekend in such a way to match the images and hopefully entertain.

What actually happened this weekend.

It's odd that a voice, or a word said in certain way, can bring back memories quicker than anything else. You hear a familar voice across a crowded room, someone you have not heard in years; and the feelings you had at your last meeting come back to you like a deep unstoppable current.

This weekend it happened to me. The format was a dream: A telephone rang twice, I picked it up, she asked "hello?", I answered "hi", then a meaninful silence that lasted a minute before waking me up.

I shook it off, pushed back the feeling and the memories that the sound of her voice in my dream invoked. In the morning I woke to the sounds of an actual phone ringing, just like my dream I picked it up and asked "Hello?". Just like my dream: silence. This time I could nothing to stop the painful memories and emotions, from spreading like jaundice from the blight buried deep within my kidney.

It was a weekend, like this one past, but two years ago. Driving home at night, she fed me chocolate covered Poki that we had just bought from the Japanese supermarket. She was wearing the thick, woolen, white sweater that I had just bought her from the gap, singing along to The Smiths: girlfriend in a coma, which had just started to play on the radio.

My memory then becomes a slideshow, bright shots etched in forever with nothing in between: A dog running in the street, her hand pointing, my white knuckles on the wheel, the pole. Then just voices, audio catching up with the video: "breathe into the mask", "we're going to take her out first", "try to stay calm", "bring the cutters here".

Then I remember waking up deathly cold, shaking. With blurred vision I recognized the inside of an ambulance, the shaking was not me but the ambulance rushing through the streets to it's destination. I looked to my left and saw someone else in the other cot. I was a stranger, she wore a red sweater and had white hair. I wondered if I had hit her with my car, I thought it was strange that she should be in the same ambulance as me.

"Your girlfriends in a coma", the ambulance man said when he noticed my eyes were open.

"She's not my girlfriend!" I replied curtly. I looked back at her again, my eyes seeing clearly now, her hair was not white it was bandages, and her sweater was not red, it was soaked with blood -- her blood. "She's my wife." I stammered before passing out.

When I came around again I was surrounded by doctors and nurses. I looked again to my left, through the double doors of the emergency room I saw my wife lying on a cart, all alone. I wondered why they were bothering so much with me, when she was more obviously hurt. I began to ask them to leave me alone and attend to her instead, but a nurse put a mask over my face and a doctor said "take him to OR".

When I woke I was in a recovery room, a surgeon was reading my chart, and talking to me like I could understand. He told me I had been very lucky, that I should have died, that they had to remove both of my kidneys, that I had a very rare blood type, that I was fortunate that they had found a donor that could give me a kidney and three pints of blood. I asked him about my wife, he said he was sorry but she had passed away as soon as she reached the hospital. I became angry, I told him that I was sorry they had let me live. He replied that it was my wife that had let me live, it was she who carried the donor card, it was her kidneys that were now in my body.

This is why her voice even in a dream affects me so, she is part of me now, I have no chance of letting her go.


There are 19 messages for this day.
<Eggs Ackley> How about Mort's Now Gone Totally Mental Day?
<Mark> I recommend Scotch. Seriously.
<Mark> I just read Mort's entry on the pics.

I think I'm going to have the Scotch now ..

<guyPaulo> I'm having a hard time with these photo's today....
<Pedro Gonzales> It's a tranquil monday here today, very quiet. Pretty relaxing
<Mort> Oops sorry, must stop huffing Kool-Aid.
<Kumiho> Um... does this mean Mrs. Mort (aka Morticia) is no more?
<Kumiho> Hey Lauren, here's your chance!
<guyPaulo> I hope this photo is on MEP tomorrow:
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Mort> I hope this one does more:
...us.news2.yimg.com...
Morticia is very well thank you very much, it's just a story.
All characters are fictional, any resemblence to real persons, past of present, is purely coincidental.
<guyPaulo> "You hope"? I thought YOU were the cruel overlord who dictates the context of our lives by judiciously selecting the photos to put up here, Mort. Are you telling us that someone else is really pullings the strings behind the MEP curtain?
<Cookieus Hackus> Really, I get up pretty early (eastern USA time) and the photo selection here usually bears little to no resemblance to the actual top 3 at yahoo, so I always assumed there was a lot of lattitude in the selection process. :)
<Mort> There is a whole day's lattitude with the selection of the photos. I also try to cut down the number of duplicates now.
<Cookieus Hackus> I wasn't complaining, BTW. It's always interesting to see what ones make the cut.
<Kumiho> I thank you for the reduced number of repeats myself.
<Mort> I think I messed up the 3rd image today. There is a subtle art to picking the right images, I am on the cusp of understanding.
<guyPaulo> If I might venture a guess Mort, I think that the combination of a theme day with the very specific nature of the first two photos led to a slow day so far today. Its hard to write about what you did over the weekend involving a plant and a bat. We can always throw in a "monkie" joke at the end, so I don't think the 3rd photo was the problem.
<obtuse> Theme day + similar images = difficult

Even without theme day, three images with similarity (nature) doesn't leave much room for creative improvisation.

<Kumiho> eh, it's only hard to write captions if you haven't got at least one pix of a half naked chick/beefcake.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post