[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - WHAT I DID OVER THE WEEKEND DAY - 03/14/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

What I did over the weekend by Mort
I spent my day like I spend most of my free days: at the botanical gardens.
The gardener Ulga -- her foul hygine was only surpassed by her gardening prowess -- asked if flowers reminded me of women's parts.

I replied that I had never actually had the chance to view a woman's 'private region'.
She laughed and dragged me heavily to the shadows behind the potting shed. I stood, my mouth agape, as she lifted up her rough skirt and showed me beneath. 'First you must rid me of my pests.' she said.
I grimaced as I plucked mites one by one from their hairy nest, and squashed their heads between my fingers.

I spent the rest of the weekend trying to coax a family of apes out of her ass.
(AP)
(AP)
(Reuters)
Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 600 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker14:07:03Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:07:02Caption #724
Mr. NonameLurker14:07:01Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:07:00Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:59Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:58Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:57Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:56Caption #355
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:55Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:54Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:53Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:52Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:51Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:50Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:49Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:48Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:47Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:46Caption #346
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:45Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:44Caption #583
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:43Caption #405
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:42Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:41Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:40Caption #631
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:39Caption #949
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:38Caption #346
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:37Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:36Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:35Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:34Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:33Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:32Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:31Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:30Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:29Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:28Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:27Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:26Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:25Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:24Caption #847
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:23Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:22Caption #855
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:21Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:20Caption #748
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:19Caption #281
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:18Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:17Caption #631
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:16Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:15Caption #588
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:14Caption #517
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:13Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:12Caption #848
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:11Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:10Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:09Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:08Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:07Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:06Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:05Caption #800
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:04Caption #324
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:03Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:02Caption #327
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:01Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker14:06:00Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:59Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:58Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:57Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:56Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:55Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:54Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:53Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:52Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:51Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:50Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:49Caption #122
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:48Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:47Caption #701
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:46Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:45Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:44Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:43Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:42Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:41Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:40Caption #455
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:39Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:38Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:37Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:36Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:35Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:34Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:33Caption #289
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:32Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:31Caption #293
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:30Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:29Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:28Caption #806
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:27Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:26Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:25Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:24Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:23Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:22Caption #802
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:21Caption #291
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:20Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:19Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:18Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:17Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:16Caption #803
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:15Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:14Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:13Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:12Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:11Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:10Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:09Caption #-18
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:08Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:07Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:06Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:05Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:04Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:03Caption #-19
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:03Caption #431
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:01Caption #-8
Mr. NonameLurker14:05:00Caption #-62
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:59Caption #-31
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:58Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:57Caption #-19
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:56Caption #-38
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:55Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:54Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:53Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:52Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:51Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:50Caption #952
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:49Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:48Caption #745
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:47Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:46Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:45Caption #294
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:44Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:43Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:42Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:41Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:40Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:39Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:38Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:37Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:36Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:35Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:34Caption #810
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:33Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:32Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:31Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:30Caption #812
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:29Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:28Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:27Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:26Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:25Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:24Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:23Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:22Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:21Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:20Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:19Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:18Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:17Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:16Caption #797
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:15Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:14Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:13Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:12Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:11Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:10Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:09Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:08Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:07Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:06Caption #815
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:05Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:04Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:03Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:02Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:01Caption #917
Mr. NonameLurker14:04:00Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:59Caption #858
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:58Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:57Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:56Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:55Caption #540
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:54Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:53Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:52Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:51Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:50Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:49Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:48Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:47Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:46Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:45Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:44Caption #902
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:43Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:42Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:41Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:40Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:39Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:38Caption #903
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:37Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:36Caption #558
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:35Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:34Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:33Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:32Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:31Caption #454
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:30Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:29Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:28Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:27Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:26Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:25Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:24Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:23Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:22Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:21Caption #906
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:20Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:19Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:18Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:17Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:16Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:15Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:14Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:13Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:12Caption #906
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:11Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:10Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:09Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:08Caption #275
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:07Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:06Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:05Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:04Caption #866
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:03Caption #281
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:02Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:01Caption #122
Mr. NonameLurker14:03:00Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:59Caption #894
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:58Caption #867
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:57Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:56Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:55Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:54Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:53Caption #967
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:52Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:51Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:50Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:49Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:48Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:47Caption #968
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:46Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:45Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:44Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:43Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:42Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:41Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:40Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:39Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:38Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:37Caption #841
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:36Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:35Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:34Caption #754
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:33Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:32Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:31Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:30Caption #923
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:29Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:28Caption #282
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:27Caption #788
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:26Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:25Caption #352
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:24Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:23Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:22Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:21Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:20Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:19Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:18Caption #250
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:17Caption #785
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:16Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:15Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:14Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:13Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:12Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:11Caption #786
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:10Caption #630
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:09Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:08Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:07Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:06Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:05Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:04Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:03Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:02Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:01Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker14:02:00Caption #787
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:59Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:58Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:57Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:56Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:55Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:54Caption #788
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:53Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:52Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:51Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:50Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:49Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:48Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:47Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:46Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:45Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:44Caption #807
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:43Caption #809
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:42Caption #272
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:41Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:40Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:39Caption #820
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:38Caption #3691773511297
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:36Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:35Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:34Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:33Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:32Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:31Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:30Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:29Caption #231
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:28Caption #454
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:27Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:26Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:25Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:24Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:23Caption #352
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:22Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:21Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:20Caption #809
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:19Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:18Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:18Caption #400
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:16Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:15Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:14Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:13Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:12Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:11Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:10Caption #454
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:09Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:08Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:07Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:06Caption #789
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:05Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:04Caption #826
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:03Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:02Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:01Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker14:01:00Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:59Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:58Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:57Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:56Caption #154
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:55Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:54Caption #250
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:53Caption #528
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:52Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:51Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:50Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:49Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:48Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:47Caption #829
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:46Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:45Caption #785
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:44Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:43Caption #577
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:42Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:41Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:40Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:39Caption #786
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:38Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:37Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:36Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:35Caption #582
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:34Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:33Caption #787
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:32Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:31Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:30Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:29Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:28Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:27Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:26Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:25Caption #255
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:24Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:23Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:22Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:21Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:20Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:19Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:18Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:17Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:16Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:15Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:14Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:13Caption #678
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:12Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:11Caption #151
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:10Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:09Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:08Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:07Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:06Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:05Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:04Caption #577
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:03Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:02Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:01Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker14:00:00Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:59Caption #89
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:58Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:57Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:56Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:55Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:54Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:53Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:52Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:51Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:50Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:49Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:48Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:47Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:46Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:45Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:44Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:43Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:42Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:41Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:40Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:39Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:38Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:37Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:36Caption #889
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:35Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:34Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:33Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:32Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:31Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:30Caption #890
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:29Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:28Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:27Caption #655
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:26Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:25Caption #820
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:24Caption #891
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:23Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:22Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:21Caption #656
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:20Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:19Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:18Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:17Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:16Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:15Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:14Caption #388
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:13Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:12Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:11Caption #894
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:10Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:09Caption #211
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:08Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:07Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:06Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:05Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:04Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:03Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:02Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:01Caption #895
Mr. NonameLurker13:59:00Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:59Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:58Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:57Caption #391
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:56Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:55Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:54Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:53Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:52Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:51Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:50Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:49Caption #225
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:48Caption #858
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:47Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:46Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:45Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:44Caption #566
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:43Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:42Caption #868
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:41Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:40Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:39Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:38Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:37Caption #188
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:36Caption #869
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:35Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:34Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:33Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:32Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:31Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:30Caption #193
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:29Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:28Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:27Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:26Caption #588
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:25Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:24Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:23Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:22Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:21Caption #403
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:20Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:19Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:18Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:17Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:16Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:15Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:14Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:13Caption #638
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:12Caption #515
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:11Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:10Caption #947
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:09Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:08Caption #193
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:07Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:06Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:05Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:04Caption #786
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:03Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:02Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:01Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker13:58:00Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:59Caption #117
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:58Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:57Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:56Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:55Caption #787
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:54Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:53Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:52Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:51Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:50Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:49Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:48Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:47Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:46Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:45Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:44Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:43Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:42Caption #786
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:41Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:40Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:39Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:38Caption #255
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:37Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:36Caption #787
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:35Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:34Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:33Caption #199
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:32Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:31Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:30Caption #265
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:29Caption #932
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:28Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:27Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:26Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:25Caption #500
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:24Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:23Caption #933
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:22Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:21Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:20Caption #899
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:19Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:18Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:17Caption #934
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:16Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:15Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:14Caption #900
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:13Caption #913
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:12Caption #231
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:11Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:10Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:09Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:08Caption #901
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:07Caption #792
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:06Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:05Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:04Caption #211
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:03Caption #248

Board [Post Message]

As you might have noticed: I have switched the theme day from Thursday to Monday, to better balance the week. If you are confused, let me remind you that today is Monday and not Thursday, although I wish it was not so...

The object of this theme: Write about your weekend in such a way to match the images and hopefully entertain.

What actually happened this weekend.

It's odd that a voice, or a word said in certain way, can bring back memories quicker than anything else. You hear a familar voice across a crowded room, someone you have not heard in years; and the feelings you had at your last meeting come back to you like a deep unstoppable current.

This weekend it happened to me. The format was a dream: A telephone rang twice, I picked it up, she asked "hello?", I answered "hi", then a meaninful silence that lasted a minute before waking me up.

I shook it off, pushed back the feeling and the memories that the sound of her voice in my dream invoked. In the morning I woke to the sounds of an actual phone ringing, just like my dream I picked it up and asked "Hello?". Just like my dream: silence. This time I could nothing to stop the painful memories and emotions, from spreading like jaundice from the blight buried deep within my kidney.

It was a weekend, like this one past, but two years ago. Driving home at night, she fed me chocolate covered Poki that we had just bought from the Japanese supermarket. She was wearing the thick, woolen, white sweater that I had just bought her from the gap, singing along to The Smiths: girlfriend in a coma, which had just started to play on the radio.

My memory then becomes a slideshow, bright shots etched in forever with nothing in between: A dog running in the street, her hand pointing, my white knuckles on the wheel, the pole. Then just voices, audio catching up with the video: "breathe into the mask", "we're going to take her out first", "try to stay calm", "bring the cutters here".

Then I remember waking up deathly cold, shaking. With blurred vision I recognized the inside of an ambulance, the shaking was not me but the ambulance rushing through the streets to it's destination. I looked to my left and saw someone else in the other cot. I was a stranger, she wore a red sweater and had white hair. I wondered if I had hit her with my car, I thought it was strange that she should be in the same ambulance as me.

"Your girlfriends in a coma", the ambulance man said when he noticed my eyes were open.

"She's not my girlfriend!" I replied curtly. I looked back at her again, my eyes seeing clearly now, her hair was not white it was bandages, and her sweater was not red, it was soaked with blood -- her blood. "She's my wife." I stammered before passing out.

When I came around again I was surrounded by doctors and nurses. I looked again to my left, through the double doors of the emergency room I saw my wife lying on a cart, all alone. I wondered why they were bothering so much with me, when she was more obviously hurt. I began to ask them to leave me alone and attend to her instead, but a nurse put a mask over my face and a doctor said "take him to OR".

When I woke I was in a recovery room, a surgeon was reading my chart, and talking to me like I could understand. He told me I had been very lucky, that I should have died, that they had to remove both of my kidneys, that I had a very rare blood type, that I was fortunate that they had found a donor that could give me a kidney and three pints of blood. I asked him about my wife, he said he was sorry but she had passed away as soon as she reached the hospital. I became angry, I told him that I was sorry they had let me live. He replied that it was my wife that had let me live, it was she who carried the donor card, it was her kidneys that were now in my body.

This is why her voice even in a dream affects me so, she is part of me now, I have no chance of letting her go.

There are 19 messages for this day.
<Eggs Ackley> How about Mort's Now Gone Totally Mental Day?
<Mark> I recommend Scotch. Seriously.
<Mark> I just read Mort's entry on the pics.

I think I'm going to have the Scotch now ..

<guyPaulo> I'm having a hard time with these photo's today....
<Pedro Gonzales> It's a tranquil monday here today, very quiet. Pretty relaxing
<Mort> Oops sorry, must stop huffing Kool-Aid.
<Kumiho> Um... does this mean Mrs. Mort (aka Morticia) is no more?
<Kumiho> Hey Lauren, here's your chance!
<guyPaulo> I hope this photo is on MEP tomorrow:
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Mort> I hope this one does more:
...us.news2.yimg.com...
Morticia is very well thank you very much, it's just a story.
All characters are fictional, any resemblence to real persons, past of present, is purely coincidental.
<guyPaulo> "You hope"? I thought YOU were the cruel overlord who dictates the context of our lives by judiciously selecting the photos to put up here, Mort. Are you telling us that someone else is really pullings the strings behind the MEP curtain?
<Cookieus Hackus> Really, I get up pretty early (eastern USA time) and the photo selection here usually bears little to no resemblance to the actual top 3 at yahoo, so I always assumed there was a lot of lattitude in the selection process. :)
<Mort> There is a whole day's lattitude with the selection of the photos. I also try to cut down the number of duplicates now.
<Cookieus Hackus> I wasn't complaining, BTW. It's always interesting to see what ones make the cut.
<Kumiho> I thank you for the reduced number of repeats myself.
<Mort> I think I messed up the 3rd image today. There is a subtle art to picking the right images, I am on the cusp of understanding.
<guyPaulo> If I might venture a guess Mort, I think that the combination of a theme day with the very specific nature of the first two photos led to a slow day so far today. Its hard to write about what you did over the weekend involving a plant and a bat. We can always throw in a "monkie" joke at the end, so I don't think the 3rd photo was the problem.
<obtuse> Theme day + similar images = difficult

Even without theme day, three images with similarity (nature) doesn't leave much room for creative improvisation.

<Kumiho> eh, it's only hard to write captions if you haven't got at least one pix of a half naked chick/beefcake.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post