Most Emailed Photos - 02/23/2004

by Mort

<-- First

Choose an alternative caption: >

Last -->-->

You know sleeping with hot twins is like the zenith of sexy.

I just have to think about it and waaaanng I get hard.

But then I think...

isn't that like incest?

(Reuters)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.

History

These 5 things happened most recently.

Mr. Noname Lurker 15:05:46 drooled over #54

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:46 drooled over #666

Mr. Noname Lurker 13:52:24 drooled over #76

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:51:51 drooled over #102

Mr. Noname Lurker 09:22:14 drooled over #555

Current Users

There have been 412 users in the last 10 minutes.

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:50 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:49 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:48 Caption #44

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:47 Caption #2

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:46 Caption #52

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:45 Caption #187

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:44 Caption #413

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:43 Caption #103

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:42 Caption #7

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:41 Caption #6

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:40 Caption #0

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:39 Caption #367

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:38 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:37 Caption #30

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:36 Caption #7

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:35 Caption #67

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:34 Caption #4

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:32 Caption #356

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:31 Caption #337

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:30 Caption #67

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:28 Caption #96

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:27 Caption #473

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:25 Caption #616

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:24 Caption #739

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:23 Caption #642

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:22 Caption #643

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:20 Caption #585

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:19 Caption #828

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:18 Caption #-59

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:15 Caption #686

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:14 Caption #303

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:12 Caption #40

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:11 Caption #569

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:10 Caption #612

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:08 Caption #333

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:07 Caption #180

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:05 Caption #179

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:04 Caption #216

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:03 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:02 Caption #341

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:19:01 Caption #848

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:59 Caption #317

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:58 Caption #15

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:57 Caption #698

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:56 Caption #572

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:55 Caption #138

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:54 Caption #23

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:53 Caption #326

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:52 Caption #493

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:50 Caption #506

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:49 Caption #163

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:48 Caption #630

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:47 Caption #508

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:46 Caption #124

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:45 Caption #158

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:44 Caption #469

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:42 Caption #535

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:41 Caption #758

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:40 Caption #794

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:39 Caption #648

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:38 Caption #508

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:37 Caption #335

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:36 Caption #24

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:35 Caption #770

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:33 Caption #53

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:31 Caption #866

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:29 Caption #161

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:27 Caption #789

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:26 Caption #645

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:25 Caption #554

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:24 Caption #535

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:22 Caption #309

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:21 Caption #112

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:20 Caption #107

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:19 Caption #490

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:17 Caption #938

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:16 Caption #728

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:13 Caption #390

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:11 Caption #593

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:09 Caption #738

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:08 Caption #88

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:07 Caption #264

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:06 Caption #593

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:05 Caption #20

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:04 Caption #64

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:02 Caption #382

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:01 Caption #395

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:18:00 Caption #720

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:57 Caption #441

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:55 Caption #494

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:54 Caption #311

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:49 Caption #660

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:45 Caption #580

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:44 Caption #753

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:43 Caption #257

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:40 Caption #500

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:38 Caption #837

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:37 Caption #923

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:36 Caption #342

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:34 Caption #161

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:30 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:29 Caption #596

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:28 Caption #477

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:22 Caption #667

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:20 Caption #498

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:18 Caption #459

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:17 Caption #400

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:16 Caption #126

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:15 Caption #151

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:14 Caption #612

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:12 Caption #305

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:11 Caption #623

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:10 Caption #876

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:07 Caption #767

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:06 Caption #271

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:02 Caption #652

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:01 Caption #785

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:17:00 Caption #542

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:59 Caption #113

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:58 Caption #167

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:57 Caption #119

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:57 Caption #283

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:55 Caption #244

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:53 Caption #318

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:51 Caption #152

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:49 Caption #646

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:45 Caption #264

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:44 Caption #328

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:39 Caption #773

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:34 Caption #166

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:32 Caption #557

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:28 Caption #554

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:27 Caption #410

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:25 Caption #501

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:24 Caption #411

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:20 Caption #325

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:18 Caption #570

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:16 Caption #975

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:15 Caption #545

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:13 Caption #623

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:12 Caption #493

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:11 Caption #339

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:10 Caption #856

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:09 Caption #105

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:08 Caption #572

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:06 Caption #536

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:04 Caption #53

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:02 Caption #739

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:01 Caption #80

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:16:00 Caption #4

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:56 Caption #687

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:55 Caption #740

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:54 Caption #169

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:53 Caption #351

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:50 Caption #81

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:44 Caption #294

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:42 Caption #47

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:40 Caption #10

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:39 Caption #385

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:38 Caption #288

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:36 Caption #700

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:35 Caption #687

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:34 Caption #807

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:32 Caption #311

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:31 Caption #266

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:30 Caption #613

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:27 Caption #614

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:26 Caption #187

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:25 Caption #17

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:23 Caption #184

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:22 Caption #106

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:21 Caption #599

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:20 Caption #435

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:19 Caption #468

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:16 Caption #586

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:15 Caption #04

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:14 Caption #545

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:13 Caption #774

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:12 Caption #809

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:10 Caption #76

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:08 Caption #143

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:06 Caption #713

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:04 Caption #739

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:03 Caption #196

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:15:00 Caption #784

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:59 Caption #678

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:58 Caption #436

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:57 Caption #771

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:56 Caption #866

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:55 Caption #407

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:54 Caption #101

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:53 Caption #563

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:52 Caption #228

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:51 Caption #670

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:50 Caption #130

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:49 Caption #143

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:46 Caption #45

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:45 Caption #561

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:42 Caption #718

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:41 Caption #84

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:38 Caption #768

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:37 Caption #828

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:36 Caption #866

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:35 Caption #449

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:34 Caption #108

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:33 Caption #604

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:32 Caption #122

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:31 Caption #877

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:30 Caption #361

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:29 Caption #455

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:28 Caption #461

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:27 Caption #77

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:25 Caption #101

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:22 Caption #15

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:20 Caption #476

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:19 Caption #185

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:17 Caption #234

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:16 Caption #564

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:15 Caption #541

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:13 Caption #667

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:12 Caption #756

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:11 Caption #758

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:10 Caption #515

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:09 Caption #426

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:06 Caption #336

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:05 Caption #492

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:02 Caption #413

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:01 Caption #46

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:14:00 Caption #413

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:58 Caption #80

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:57 Caption #319

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:56 Caption #667

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:53 Caption #589

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:52 Caption #402

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:51 Caption #406

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:47 Caption #506

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:46 Caption #188

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:45 Caption #332

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:44 Caption #261

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:42 Caption #622

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:41 Caption #448

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:40 Caption #398

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:39 Caption #9

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:38 Caption #556

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:37 Caption #113

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:34 Caption #406

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:33 Caption #438

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:31 Caption #555

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:26 Caption #116

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:20 Caption #262

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:19 Caption #686

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:15 Caption #27

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:13 Caption #945

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:12 Caption #550

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:11 Caption #830

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:09 Caption #577

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:08 Caption #430

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:07 Caption #711

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:06 Caption #704

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:05 Caption #563

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:04 Caption #267

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:03 Caption #708

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:02 Caption #434

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:01 Caption #135

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:13:00 Caption #572

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:59 Caption #559

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:57 Caption #299

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:55 Caption #262

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:53 Caption #130

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:51 Caption #309

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:50 Caption #592

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:43 Caption #555

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:41 Caption #323

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:40 Caption #559

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:38 Caption #201

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:37 Caption #705

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:35 Caption #914

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:34 Caption #526

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:33 Caption #439

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:32 Caption #333

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:29 Caption #343

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:28 Caption #401

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:25 Caption #252

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:24 Caption #164

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:22 Caption #49

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:21 Caption #356

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:20 Caption #181

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:19 Caption #2

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:18 Caption #56

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:17 Caption #392

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:15 Caption #160

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:13 Caption #620

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:12 Caption #335

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:11 Caption #740

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:10 Caption #345

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:09 Caption #528

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:08 Caption #170

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:06 Caption #444

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:05 Caption #342

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:04 Caption #469

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:02 Caption #422

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:01 Caption #730

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:12:00 Caption #883

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:59 Caption #411

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:58 Caption #684

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:55 Caption #639

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:52 Caption #469

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:51 Caption #676

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:49 Caption #500

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:48 Caption #447

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:47 Caption #708

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:44 Caption #493

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:42 Caption #23

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:41 Caption #15

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:40 Caption #368

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:39 Caption #419

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:37 Caption #16

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:35 Caption #524

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:33 Caption #33

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:31 Caption #641

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:30 Caption #442

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:29 Caption #896

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:27 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:26 Caption #49

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:25 Caption #894

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:24 Caption #716

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:23 Caption #642

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:22 Caption #148

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:21 Caption #499

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:20 Caption #402

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:19 Caption #839

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:18 Caption #519

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:17 Caption #303

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:16 Caption #198

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:15 Caption #572

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:14 Caption #447

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:13 Caption #780

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:12 Caption #411

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:11 Caption #530

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:09 Caption #349

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:08 Caption #88

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:07 Caption #275

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:06 Caption #417

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:05 Caption #205

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:04 Caption #405

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:03 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:02 Caption #584

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:11:01 Caption #657

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:59 Caption #374

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:58 Caption #626

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:57 Caption #575

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:56 Caption #609

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:55 Caption #103

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:54 Caption #854

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:53 Caption #457

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:52 Caption #120

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:51 Caption #410

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:49 Caption #201

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:48 Caption #378

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:47 Caption #52

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:46 Caption #775

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:45 Caption #624

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:41 Caption #691

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:40 Caption #15

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:39 Caption #956

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:38 Caption #527

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:37 Caption #590

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:36 Caption #303

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:35 Caption #354

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:34 Caption #707

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:33 Caption #-74

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:32 Caption #354

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:31 Caption #20

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:30 Caption #374

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:29 Caption #-53

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:28 Caption #-18

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:27 Caption #-69

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:26 Caption #-19

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:25 Caption #229

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:24 Caption #309

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:23 Caption #493

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:22 Caption #589

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:21 Caption #790

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:20 Caption #535

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:19 Caption #159

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:18 Caption #397

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:17 Caption #576

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:16 Caption #921

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:15 Caption #947

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:14 Caption #707

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:13 Caption #896

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:12 Caption #891

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:11 Caption #547

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:10 Caption #496

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:09 Caption #-41

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:08 Caption #514

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:07 Caption #535

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:06 Caption #768

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:05 Caption #256

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:04 Caption #455

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:03 Caption #44

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:02 Caption #706

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:01 Caption #371

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:10:00 Caption #711

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:09:59 Caption #153

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:09:58 Caption #670

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:09:57 Caption #491

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:09:56 Caption #811

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:09:55 Caption #465

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:09:54 Caption #215

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:09:52 Caption #367

Mr. Noname Lurker 04:09:51 Caption #397

Board

[Post Message]

Happy Birthday Axolotl!

Talking about incest, I just got back from an orthodox jewish wedding -- wait a second those two things have nothing in common.

I abhor tradition, so the idea of going to an event that's dunked in three thousand years of history... well it's not exactly my slice of challah. I'll get straight to the point shall I? These are my ignorant gentile impressions.

Firstly it took so long to get going, we were there at 7pm, but it took them to 9pm to start the ceremony. We weren't sure if this was normal, there seemed to be a fair bit of confusion. We spent our time trying to pick out which women were hiding their hair beneath wigs for religious reasons, and wondering why some ladies' dresses were longer than others. As you might be able to tell I spent most of this time around the women folk, the men folk were in their own little room, a scary room, a room I was not willing to enter... a room of singing rabbis! I told you this was going to be ignorant.

Finally something happened, the men came out while dragging the groom tightly by the arms, his face was ashen, he did not at all look pleased about this. He was brought before his bride and the rabbi, she looked extremely pissed. There were sharp words, hand guestures, stares and many shakes of the head, before the groom tore himself away and walked out of the room.

I have no idea what happened, none of us gentiles did, it looked like the wedding was cancelled, but no one seemed too concerned, how odd. We found out that the bride did not like the conditions, which condition I don't know, I have no clue of the conditions at all. What we had witnessed seemed to be a standoff, a "that's my final offer take it or leave it!", maybe it was something else.

Five minutes later the groom came back in, less ashen this time, something had been resolved, candles were lit and the bride's veil was... veiled. We all rushed outside to the ceremony, it was 9pm already.

Haphazard is a good word for the ceremony if you compare it to the christian weddings I normally get dragged to. A tiny stage with at least twelve bearded men huddled all around the bride and groom, inviting other men on stage to see or to talk. It didn't make much sense to me. Women sat on the left, men on the right, just the first signs of the separation of the sexes to come. I will gloss over the ceremony, except for the part where they lost a rabbi -- pull him out of a hat, I shouted, no actually I didn't.

The meal was ok except for the fact that the salad had been sitting on the table since 6pm. The dancing was separated and very entertaining, males on the left, women on the right, divided by screens. High energy and plenty of displays of public affections, just not between opposite sexes. We were sat on an odd table, old orthodox jewish women bookended by their husbands. It became very apparent to me that while the males ruled all things spiritual, the women ruled everything else with a tight fist.

After we finally ate the main course at eleven thirty, we made our excuses and escaped during the second dance of same sex bonding.

Sorry for the lack of sense and punctuation, it's 1am and I am being hurried.

There are 19 messages for this day.

<David Byrden> You must read the first section of this! This kid made me laugh so hard I cried.

...www.phoenixnewtimes.com...

<jordie3> Man, I'm glad all my cousin's weddings have been either secular or Reconstructionist. We got to laugh during the ceremonies, and dance to Huey Lewis and the Eurythmics afterwards. Yay for relaxed Judaism!

<JulieK> I wonder why is it that same-sex bonding is inforced? Mort said "displays of pubilc affection" so that is more than a smile and a holding hands.

<guyPaulo> I guess organized, violent racism is funnier in Ireland than here in the states......

<3Suns> Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife. Or even appear to be capable of coveting thy neighbor's wife. Or anyone else's wife, or anyone who could be, at some future time, someone else's wife. Or else.

<David Byrden> guyPaulo, it's all about making them look stupid. Which he did brilliantly. I hope his friends kept straight faces throughout.

<Lauren> Mort, I hope you were 'being hurried' for purposes other than sleep...

<guyPaulo> DB, I do realize that the writer's intention is to make them look stupid (which he does do), but it's VERY dangerous to dismiss anything about these kinds of groups. I live in the south, which refined its own brand of hate, and these kinds of individuals are not to be underestimated.

<guyPaulo> The "south" as in the south-eastern portion of the US of A. Sorry, I didn't mean to be Ameri-centric there....

<guyPaulo> Shit, I almost forgot: HAPPY BIRTHDAY AXOLOTL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

<ElvisThePelvis> Weird, this was exactly my order for candidates:

Kucinich, Rep. Dennis, OH - Democrat Sharpton, Reverend Al - Democrat
Kerry, Senator John, MA - Democrat
Edwards, Senator John, NC - Democrat
Bush, President George W. - Republican

To be fair the top match was 58% and the bottom was Bush with 13%.

<ElvisThePelvis> Oops, wrong place. Oh well, those came from here:

...selectsmart.com...

<guyPaulo> I'm confused. Yahoo has the following photo on a story about gay marriage, but I can't figure out the sexes of the people in the photo Any ideas?
...story.news.yahoo.com...

<Lauren> guy, the are both women. Take another look at J.T. Although she is wearing a suit and has a masculine haircut, her features are definitely feminine.

<Axolotl> Wow, thanks everybody! Today is the first day of the last year of my 20s...

<guyPaulo> WTF..?..No way Lauren....

<MLimburg> boojah dude .. the 30s rock :)

<t> fuck

<guyPaulo> hey ya'll

Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post