[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 01/25/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

It's the dawn of a cool brand new year.

The year of the monkey looks like it's going to be very colourful one.

In fact I've already broken my new year's resolution.
(AFP)
(AFP)
(Reuters)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 335 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker16:12:04Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:12:02Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker16:12:00Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:59Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:58Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:56Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:55Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:53Caption #551
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:51Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:49Caption #337
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:48Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:47Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:45Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:44Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:43Caption #108
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:42Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:41Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:40Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:38Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:36Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:35Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:34Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:32Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:31Caption #856
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:30Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:28Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:26Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:24Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:23Caption #400
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:22Caption #663
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:20Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:15Caption #237
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:09Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:08Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:04Caption #282
Mr. NonameLurker16:11:02Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:58Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:57Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:53Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:52Caption #841
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:45Caption #804
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:44Caption #31
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:43Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:42Caption #586
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:38Caption #956
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:37Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:36Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:35Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:31Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:29Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:28Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:25Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:22Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:21Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:20Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:19Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:18Caption #880
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:17Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:16Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:15Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:13Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:11Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:07Caption #884
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:06Caption #479
Mr. NonameLurker16:10:05Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:59Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:56Caption #921
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:55Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:53Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:44Caption #534
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:42Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:41Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:30Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:28Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:21Caption #635
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:18Caption #557
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:15Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:09Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:08Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:07Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:06Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:05Caption #946
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:03Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:02Caption #669
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:01Caption #545
Mr. NonameLurker16:09:00Caption #802
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:58Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:57Caption #377
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:55Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:54Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:52Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:50Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:47Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:46Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:44Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:43Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:40Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:38Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:36Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:33Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:31Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:27Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:25Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:23Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:20Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:15Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:14Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:12Caption #922
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:10Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:09Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:07Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:04Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:03Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:02Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:01Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker16:08:00Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:59Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:58Caption #986
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:57Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:55Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:53Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:52Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:50Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:49Caption #669
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:48Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:47Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:46Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:45Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:44Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:43Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:41Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:39Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:38Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:37Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:36Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:35Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:33Caption #117
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:31Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:30Caption #461
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:29Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:26Caption #322
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:23Caption #692
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:22Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:21Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:20Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:19Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:17Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:16Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:15Caption #524
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:14Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:12Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:11Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:10Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:08Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:07Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:06Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:05Caption #355
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:04Caption #42
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:03Caption #842
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:02Caption #182
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:01Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker16:07:00Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:57Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:56Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:54Caption #282
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:53Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:51Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:49Caption #635
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:44Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:42Caption #475
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:40Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:35Caption #-58
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:32Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:31Caption #948
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:30Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:29Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:23Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:21Caption #288
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:19Caption #872
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:14Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:12Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:11Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:09Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:07Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:05Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:04Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker16:06:02Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:58Caption #672
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:54Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:53Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:50Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:45Caption #677
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:44Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:42Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:40Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:39Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:38Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:37Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:36Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:34Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:33Caption #838
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:31Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:30Caption #833
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:29Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:28Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:27Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:25Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:22Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:21Caption #249
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:20Caption #787
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:19Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:18Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:17Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:15Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:08Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:04Caption #314
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:02Caption #985
Mr. NonameLurker16:05:00Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:57Caption #909
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:54Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:53Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:52Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:49Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:47Caption #99
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:45Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:44Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:43Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:42Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:41Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:40Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:39Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:38Caption #316
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:37Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:36Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:35Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:33Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:31Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:30Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:29Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:28Caption #678
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:27Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:26Caption #881
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:25Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:24Caption #99
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:22Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:20Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:19Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:18Caption #867
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:17Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:16Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:15Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:11Caption #108
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:08Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:07Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:06Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:05Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:04Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:03Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:02Caption #755
Mr. NonameLurker16:04:00Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:59Caption #910
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:58Caption #831
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:57Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:56Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:55Caption #840
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:53Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:50Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:49Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:47Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:46Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:45Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:43Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:42Caption #286
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:41Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:40Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:39Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:38Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:37Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:36Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:35Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:34Caption #922
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:31Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:29Caption #5.8
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:28Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:27Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:25Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:24Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:23Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:21Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:20Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:19Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:18Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:17Caption #-68
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:16Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:15Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:14Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:13Caption #775
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:12Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:11Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:10Caption #991
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:09Caption #771
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:08Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:07Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:06Caption #374
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:05Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:04Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:01Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker16:03:00Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:56Caption #767
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:55Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:54Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:53Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:52Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:51Caption #274
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:50Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:49Caption #950
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:48Caption #905
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:47Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:44Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:41Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:40Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:39Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:36Caption #351
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:35Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:32Caption #959
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:31Caption #338
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:28Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:26Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:23Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:19Caption #320
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:12Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:11Caption #487
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:08Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:07Caption #854
Mr. NonameLurker16:02:06Caption #348

Board [Post Message]

I'm sure all of you have had that feeling that someone is talking about you.

"My ears are burning", my mother used to always say, then she would find her an apple to help her workout the first letter of the name of the person talking about her. This last friday I had the chilling feeling that someone was crying out for me. There was nothing I could do for them, since I was all out of apples.

This Saturday morning I had the best dream I have ever had, this time I wasn't dying. Oh! No it was much worse than that.

It started in some city, I parked my car in a very bad area of town, on top of a skyscraper for some reason. I was wondering, wandering around the worst area of town, when I saw an internet booth. So I decided to use it to check out the website of a man who I want to be friends with, but who actually hates me.

His website turned out to be a large eBay auction website with a large image of his warehouse and all the weird stuff he sold. I was staring at the image on the screen when I suddenly realized that I was in the warehouse, it was a large barn in a forest, just off a main road. I decided to look for something to buy from him, so I could email him, and perhaps we could be friends. I walked around, the warehouse was crowded with people. I saw the cash register so I decided to walk towards it to see if he was there.

When I got into full view of the register I saw someone else selling items. Someone radient. Suddenly everything else in the warehouse blured into abstract, she stood out in stunning full detail.

She glanced my way and our eyes met for an instance. I quickly turned and walked out towards the door, feeling intense shame for being where I was.

I reached the road, when I finally couldn't resist glancing back. She had followed me out, and again everything melted into abstract except her.

She saw me, I saw her mouth "Oh fuck!" and then smirk ruefully. I turned and started to walk towards her, she walked towards me. We were just about to speak, WHEN I WOKE UP!

When I woke up I desperately needed chocolate, but I had none. American chocolate is pretty awful, with the exception of what I call Schnarfen Barfen because I can never remember what it's real name is.


There are 35 messages for this day.
<Mort> I've been having some weird dreams recently.
<David Byrden> There are dreams wherein your subconscious is trying to tell you something profound about your life.

And there are dreams where you are just making up wierd shit as you go along.

<Axolotl> Mort, I like your new blog-style editorials! Keep'em coming!
<guyPaulo> I dreamed I was smoking pot with Paris Hilton last night. Seriously.
<yoyology> I had a dream where I was standing in sort-of Sun God robes on a pyramid, with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at me.

Why am I the only one who has that dream?
<3Suns> I don't think you are, yoyo. I seem to remember a certain Val Kilmer having a very similar one.
<3Suns> Ok, that pic of Johnny Rotten and the model and the koala is just about the funniest thing I've seen in a while. I don't know how I'd caption it though...
<guyPaulo> Damn it. My attempt to block my id from Mort's log has failed.
<Lauren> Suggestions please: I have a HUGELY important job interview tomorrow. Last week, I put all of my suits and my down coat in the cleaners for pick up today. We had a huge storm last night and the cleaner is closed for the day. Can I break their window to retrieve my clothing?
<yoyology> I once traveled for a job interview only to discover I'd forgotten my suit. I went to Name Brand Clothing and found a nice spring suit for about $50. It was my lucky interview suit from then on. I hope you have as much luck, Lauren.
<Mountaineer> Mort, That dream RAWKS. Seriously.
<Mort> Thank you Mountaineer. It might rawk, but it ruined my weekend.
<Mort> Mountaineer: Would you be kind enough to post some captions some time?
Lauren: I closely follow the wonderful world of fashion. Suits are out right now, just let the dry clean keep them. What you need for any interview is some sweats with the word "JUICY" on the ass and a thong. Make sure the pants are pulled down far enough to expose the thong. Also make sure you bend over infront of the interviewer enough to show that thong off. That look OMG is so like the most like attractive look in the world OMG.
<Mountaineer> I will do what I can with what I have. I am a spy, you know.
<Mort> I have a gift for you spy. I give you a meaninful silence, sit in it for a while and let weird ideas float into your mind.

Then pass that meaning onto the images.

<guyPaulo> Uhhmmmm, Mort might be kidding, but that thong trick did work for me when I interviewed for that alter boy position.....
<Lauren> Unfortunately, I was away for five days and my juicy sweats as well as all of my thongs (and both sets of pasties) are in the wash.
<guyPaulo> I would be MORE than happy to loan you my thong Lauren......
<Mort> Doesn't she already owe you a pair of Caption Monkie underpants?
<JulieK> I dreamed last night that a ghost was putting spiders on my head :(
<Mort> Just how does a ghost pick up spiders Julie?
<Lauren> Last night I dreamed that I was broke and out of work and .... wait a minute ... that was not a dream...
<3Suns> Lauren, is it an option to just go out and buy a new suit? I don't think the interviewers would be very impressed if you committed a felony to look good at the interview...
<guyPaulo> That depends on the job, 3Suns. If Lauren is trying to get a job with an Asian Street Gang, a felony might just do the trick.
<JulieK> He moved them with his mind, Mort.
<Mort> A male ghost dropping spiders on your head? I think some ectoplasm has a crush on you!
<Jellyloo> I think I know what that is like. Moving things with my mind, that is.
<Mort> I just decided to write a children's story about a 9 year old boy and the ghost of an 8 year old girl.
How coincidental.
<Jellyloo> very. Sounds like a love story.
<Mort> No it's not. It's a story of friendship, but it is very dark.
I need someone to write the girl's viewpoint. I know who my first choice is, and JK Rowling (my second choice) is not returning my phone calls.
<Jellyloo> I know a writer, but she is having some trouble with his hands. I think he had an allergic reaction to a mosquito bite. That does nothing to help you. I will see if my writer knows a writer.
<Mort> That would be most helpful. I need someone female who has a quirky imagination, but knows how it feels to be dark.
Email me sometime if you can think of a match.
<Saltydawg> My girlfriend sounds just perfect for your endeavor. I will ask her if she is interested.
<Mort> Thank you both. I will start writing the first chapter right now. While I am being paid to do other work...
Maybe, like this website, something will come of this.
<Carol> Not as a collaborator suggestion, but possibly entertainment for those who may be so inclined :
...www.eventhorizon.com...


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post