[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 01/26/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Britney, you have no talent! No wait, I am wrong, you'd make a very talented hooker!

You are not blessed!

George Bush and cronies, I say to you stupid, stupid, stupid. Seeing someone retarded as you makes me agree with contraception.

You are not blessed!

You my son, are Catholic Idol material.

You are coming to the Vatican.
(AP)
(AFP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 343 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker07:36:12Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker07:36:11Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker07:36:09Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker07:36:07Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker07:36:05Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker07:36:02Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:59Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:51Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:47Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:45Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:44Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:41Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:40Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:39Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:35Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:32Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:31Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:30Caption #626
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:29Caption #789
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:25Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:24Caption #627
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:21Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:17Caption #825
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:15Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:11Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:10Caption #927
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:09Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker07:35:05Caption #539
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:59Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:56Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:55Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:53Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:49Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:48Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:45Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:40Caption #188
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:39Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:30Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:29Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:27Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:24Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:23Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:22Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:21Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:19Caption #910
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:18Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:17Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:13Caption #566
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:10Caption #-33
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:08Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:07Caption #662
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:06Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker07:34:03Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:57Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:56Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:54Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:53Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:51Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:50Caption #458
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:49Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:48Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:47Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:46Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:45Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:40Caption #528
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:39Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:37Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:35Caption #933
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:34Caption #829
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:33Caption #319
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:31Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:29Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:28Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:27Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:26Caption #33
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:24Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:20Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:19Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:18Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:17Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:16Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:14Caption #374
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:13Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:11Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:09Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:08Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:07Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker07:33:05Caption #910
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:59Caption #818
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:57Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:53Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:52Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:51Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:49Caption #524
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:48Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:47Caption #478
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:46Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:43Caption #566
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:39Caption #606
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:37Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:35Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:33Caption #324
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:32Caption #238
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:31Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:28Caption #824
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:27Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:25Caption #797
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:24Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:23Caption #352
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:19Caption #916
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:14Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:13Caption #857
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:12Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:09Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:08Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:07Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:05Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:04Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:02Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:01Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker07:32:00Caption #401
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:59Caption #537
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:57Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:53Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:48Caption #806
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:47Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:46Caption #322
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:44Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:43Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:40Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:37Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:36Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:34Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:29Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:27Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:26Caption #82
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:25Caption #532
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:24Caption #880
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:21Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:20Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:15Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:14Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:10Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:09Caption #942
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:08Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:07Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:05Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:04Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:02Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker07:31:00Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:56Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:55Caption #851
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:54Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:53Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:52Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:51Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:50Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:49Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:48Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:47Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:46Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:45Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:44Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:43Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:38Caption #944
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:36Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:35Caption #836
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:34Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:33Caption #191
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:32Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:31Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:30Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:29Caption #343
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:28Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:27Caption #772
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:26Caption #338
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:25Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:24Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:23Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:22Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:21Caption #337
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:20Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:16Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:15Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:13Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:11Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:08Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:07Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:06Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:05Caption #784
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:04Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:03Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:02Caption #727
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:01Caption #139
Mr. NonameLurker07:30:00Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:59Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:58Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:57Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:56Caption #-2
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:55Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:53Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:50Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:49Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:48Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:43Caption #545
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:42Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:41Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:40Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:39Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:38Caption #855
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:37Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:36Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:35Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:34Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:33Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:32Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:31Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:30Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:26Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:25Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:17Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:16Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:15Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:14Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:13Caption #417
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:12Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:11Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:10Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:09Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:08Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:07Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:06Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:05Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:04Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:03Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:02Caption #875
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:01Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker07:29:00Caption #331
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:59Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:58Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:57Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:56Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:55Caption #643
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:54Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:52Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:48Caption #812
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:47Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:46Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:45Caption #159
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:44Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:43Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:42Caption #544
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:41Caption #316
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:40Caption #479
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:39Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:38Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:37Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:34Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:26Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:22Caption #557
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:21Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:20Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:18Caption #374
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:13Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:12Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:11Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:10Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:09Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:08Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:07Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:06Caption #553
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:05Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:04Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:03Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker07:28:02Caption #82
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:57Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:54Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:48Caption #-5
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:47Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:46Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:45Caption #-18
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:44Caption #-9
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:43Caption #-61
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:42Caption #-4
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:41Caption #-14
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:40Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:39Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:38Caption #-66
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:37Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:36Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:35Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:34Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:33Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:32Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:31Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:30Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:29Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:28Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:27Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:26Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:25Caption #699
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:24Caption #785
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:23Caption #606
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:22Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:21Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:20Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:19Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:18Caption #666
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:17Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:13Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:12Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:11Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:06Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker07:27:05Caption #540
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:59Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:54Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:51Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:50Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:49Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:48Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:47Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:46Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:46Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:44Caption #677
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:43Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:42Caption #853
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:41Caption #157
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:40Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:36Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:34Caption #954
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:33Caption #241
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:32Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:31Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:30Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:26Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:23Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:18Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:17Caption #271
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:16Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:15Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:14Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:13Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker07:26:12Caption #10

Board [Post Message]

Someone told me last week that it would do me good to watch Casablanca. I told them that I owned the DVD, and that my calendar at work was currently showing Casablanca. January is Casablanca month, which is pretty damn ironic.

I watched it again on Friday night. I sat in the dark and watched it until it finished at 2am. (Which could explain my weird dream on Saturday morning.) The film teaches you how to be truly noble, how to be strong when you are feeling your weakest. It is a shame that these attributes are so hard to pull off in real life. When it comes to the crunch and your true feelings are on the line, it's almost impossible to let go of something so fragile and precious, even if it is your only choice.

I hope none of you have to make that kind of decision.

On the lighter side, we put together 62 feet of bookcases this weekend and installed most of our books in it. Finally I have a library, I hope Yoyology approves.

Good luck on your interview today Lauren!


There are 27 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Thanks to the great Spike Milligan for the first panel.
<Lauren> The film teaches you about loving and letting go. How to live afterwards, you have to learn on your own.
<shininglion> Mort you are a hopeless romantic. This is why I am in love with you.

*shininglion plots devious ways to get C out of the picture...

<Carol> Lauren, we want you to get the job and be happy, but what will become of us if you have less captioning time? It's just like Casablanca!
<guyPaulo> Of all the web sites in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine....
<yoyology> It's not a library without a cataloging system. How can you know what you've got otherwise? :-)

We currently have about that many books packed onto three bookcases that size (no room for knickknacks on our shelves!). Plus, we have 15-20 liquor boxes full of books in my mother-in-law's basement waiting to be looked through. It's a sickness.

<Lauren> Last time I moved, I got rid of 60 boxes of books. Most I put on a shelf at work and marked them as free. It started a trading library that was really cool. I gave some to the library and some I gave to a homeless shelter. I still have three bookcases and several boxes.
<guyPaulo> That's a good idea Lauren. I think I'll donate my collection of Ferrari repair manuals to the local homeless shelter...
<yoyology> A note from the librarian:

Be aware that items donated to the library rarely make it to the shelf. Unless they are very recent (within the last two years or so) and in excellent condition (no writing in the margins!) the library will probably place them in a book sale or simply discard them. In particular, don't try to give a public library your old college textbooks. They are rarely useful for a general audience. Shelters, coffeehouses, domestic violence centers, etc. are good places to take books you don't want and can't sell, but in a lot of cases, hard as it is to say, it's best just to take them to a recycling center.

<mypalmike> If you happen to live in the San Francisco area or don't mind paying shipping charges, the "Bridge to Asia" program wants college textbooks.
...www.bridge.org...
<Ilsa> Casablanca is one of my favorite movies. So bittersweet.
<Mort> I like my movies like my chocolate and my women.

I should have guessed that everyone who regularly posts here would have a huge collection of books.

<Ilsa> I like my movies and chocolate like my men; deeply rich, foreign, with well developed story line/flavor (and hopefully not too confusing or filled with pesticides).
<Mort> I think I know of someone rich, foreign with a well developed story who could feed you valrhona while you watched Amelie.
<apple juice is a verb> I am so happy that hip-hop has made its way to the Vatican. Now I can say to my parents, "See? God likes it."
<Lauren> Well, I didn't NOT get the job... it's just that no one who was supposed to interview me made it in today because of the weather. Hey, *I* made it in, that ought to be good for something....
<3Suns> Ah, well now you can get your suit back in time. Keep us posted, Lauren.
<Mort> They ought to just give you the job after treating you so badly. Just give me their phone numbers, an Image Gorilla has a lot of sway in this world.
<guyPaulo> ....sigh....I'm just not feeling very funny today....
<Mort> Whats up guy? Tell uncle Mort your woes.
<Mountaineer> It is hard to be funny with so many troubles, I know how that is.
<Mort> I also know how it is. You need to be the happy clown, smiling on the outside, crying on the inside.
<Mountaineer> ...biting your nails down to the quick while trying to remember your name after intensive deprogramming.
<Mort> Juggling pins, each one reminds you of the shape of the woman you once loved -- the one you had to leave behind when you left the Island of Tonga. No wonder you always drop the pins!
Your heartbreak is a high cost for the circus audiences' laughter.
<apple juice is a verb> "Laugh, clown laugh...even though your heart is breaking."
<yoyology> "But Doctor, I am Pagliacci!"
...www.operasj.org...
<guyPaulo> Let's see, I have stress...stress...oh yes, and more stress....(being a professional caption-monkie is hard work!)


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post