[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 01/26/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Britney, you have no talent! No wait, I am wrong, you'd make a very talented hooker!

You are not blessed!

George Bush and cronies, I say to you stupid, stupid, stupid. Seeing someone retarded as you makes me agree with contraception.

You are not blessed!

You my son, are Catholic Idol material.

You are coming to the Vatican.
(AP)
(AFP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 175 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker11:29:04Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker11:29:03Caption #-58
Mr. NonameLurker11:29:02Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker11:29:01Caption #-10
Mr. NonameLurker11:29:00Caption #-11
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:59Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:57Caption #-46
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:56Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:54Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:53Caption #51
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:52Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:51Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:50Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:49Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:48Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:47Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:46Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:45Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:44Caption #975
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:43Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:42Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:41Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:40Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:39Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:38Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:37Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:36Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:35Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:34Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:33Caption #388
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:32Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:31Caption #817
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:30Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:29Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:28Caption #517
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:27Caption #316
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:26Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:25Caption #191
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:23Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:21Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:20Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:19Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:18Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:16Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:15Caption #414
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:13Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:12Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:10Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:09Caption #186
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:08Caption #-2
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:07Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:06Caption #188
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:05Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:04Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:03Caption #914
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:02Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:01Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker11:28:00Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:59Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:57Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:56Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:54Caption #849
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:53Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:52Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:51Caption #958
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:50Caption #783
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:49Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:48Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:47Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:46Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:45Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:43Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:41Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:40Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:37Caption #249
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:35Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:33Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:32Caption #500
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:31Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:29Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:27Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:26Caption #983
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:25Caption #252
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:24Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:23Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:22Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:21Caption #847
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:20Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:19Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:18Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:17Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:16Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:15Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:14Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:13Caption #51
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:12Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:11Caption #250
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:10Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:09Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:08Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:07Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:06Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:05Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:04Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:03Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:02Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:01Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker11:27:00Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:59Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:58Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:57Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:56Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:54Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:53Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:52Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:51Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:50Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:49Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:48Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:47Caption #162
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:46Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:45Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:44Caption #416
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:43Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:42Caption #699
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:41Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:40Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:39Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:38Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:37Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:36Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:35Caption #254
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:34Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:33Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:32Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:30Caption #896
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:29Caption #649
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:28Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:27Caption #461
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:25Caption #-32
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:24Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:21Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:20Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:17Caption #766
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:15Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:13Caption #799
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:09Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:08Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:07Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:05Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:03Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:02Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker11:26:00Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:59Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:57Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:56Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:55Caption #720
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:54Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:53Caption #337
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:52Caption #249
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:51Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:50Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:49Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:48Caption #224
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:47Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:46Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:45Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:42Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:41Caption #878
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:40Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:39Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:38Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:37Caption #320
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:37Caption #309
Mr. NonameLurker11:25:35Caption #197

Board [Post Message]

Someone told me last week that it would do me good to watch Casablanca. I told them that I owned the DVD, and that my calendar at work was currently showing Casablanca. January is Casablanca month, which is pretty damn ironic.

I watched it again on Friday night. I sat in the dark and watched it until it finished at 2am. (Which could explain my weird dream on Saturday morning.) The film teaches you how to be truly noble, how to be strong when you are feeling your weakest. It is a shame that these attributes are so hard to pull off in real life. When it comes to the crunch and your true feelings are on the line, it's almost impossible to let go of something so fragile and precious, even if it is your only choice.

I hope none of you have to make that kind of decision.

On the lighter side, we put together 62 feet of bookcases this weekend and installed most of our books in it. Finally I have a library, I hope Yoyology approves.

Good luck on your interview today Lauren!


There are 27 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Thanks to the great Spike Milligan for the first panel.
<Lauren> The film teaches you about loving and letting go. How to live afterwards, you have to learn on your own.
<shininglion> Mort you are a hopeless romantic. This is why I am in love with you.

*shininglion plots devious ways to get C out of the picture...

<Carol> Lauren, we want you to get the job and be happy, but what will become of us if you have less captioning time? It's just like Casablanca!
<guyPaulo> Of all the web sites in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine....
<yoyology> It's not a library without a cataloging system. How can you know what you've got otherwise? :-)

We currently have about that many books packed onto three bookcases that size (no room for knickknacks on our shelves!). Plus, we have 15-20 liquor boxes full of books in my mother-in-law's basement waiting to be looked through. It's a sickness.

<Lauren> Last time I moved, I got rid of 60 boxes of books. Most I put on a shelf at work and marked them as free. It started a trading library that was really cool. I gave some to the library and some I gave to a homeless shelter. I still have three bookcases and several boxes.
<guyPaulo> That's a good idea Lauren. I think I'll donate my collection of Ferrari repair manuals to the local homeless shelter...
<yoyology> A note from the librarian:

Be aware that items donated to the library rarely make it to the shelf. Unless they are very recent (within the last two years or so) and in excellent condition (no writing in the margins!) the library will probably place them in a book sale or simply discard them. In particular, don't try to give a public library your old college textbooks. They are rarely useful for a general audience. Shelters, coffeehouses, domestic violence centers, etc. are good places to take books you don't want and can't sell, but in a lot of cases, hard as it is to say, it's best just to take them to a recycling center.

<mypalmike> If you happen to live in the San Francisco area or don't mind paying shipping charges, the "Bridge to Asia" program wants college textbooks.
...www.bridge.org...
<Ilsa> Casablanca is one of my favorite movies. So bittersweet.
<Mort> I like my movies like my chocolate and my women.

I should have guessed that everyone who regularly posts here would have a huge collection of books.

<Ilsa> I like my movies and chocolate like my men; deeply rich, foreign, with well developed story line/flavor (and hopefully not too confusing or filled with pesticides).
<Mort> I think I know of someone rich, foreign with a well developed story who could feed you valrhona while you watched Amelie.
<apple juice is a verb> I am so happy that hip-hop has made its way to the Vatican. Now I can say to my parents, "See? God likes it."
<Lauren> Well, I didn't NOT get the job... it's just that no one who was supposed to interview me made it in today because of the weather. Hey, *I* made it in, that ought to be good for something....
<3Suns> Ah, well now you can get your suit back in time. Keep us posted, Lauren.
<Mort> They ought to just give you the job after treating you so badly. Just give me their phone numbers, an Image Gorilla has a lot of sway in this world.
<guyPaulo> ....sigh....I'm just not feeling very funny today....
<Mort> Whats up guy? Tell uncle Mort your woes.
<Mountaineer> It is hard to be funny with so many troubles, I know how that is.
<Mort> I also know how it is. You need to be the happy clown, smiling on the outside, crying on the inside.
<Mountaineer> ...biting your nails down to the quick while trying to remember your name after intensive deprogramming.
<Mort> Juggling pins, each one reminds you of the shape of the woman you once loved -- the one you had to leave behind when you left the Island of Tonga. No wonder you always drop the pins!
Your heartbreak is a high cost for the circus audiences' laughter.
<apple juice is a verb> "Laugh, clown laugh...even though your heart is breaking."
<yoyology> "But Doctor, I am Pagliacci!"
...www.operasj.org...
<guyPaulo> Let's see, I have stress...stress...oh yes, and more stress....(being a professional caption-monkie is hard work!)


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post