[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 01/26/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Britney, you have no talent! No wait, I am wrong, you'd make a very talented hooker!

You are not blessed!

George Bush and cronies, I say to you stupid, stupid, stupid. Seeing someone retarded as you makes me agree with contraception.

You are not blessed!

You my son, are Catholic Idol material.

You are coming to the Vatican.
(AP)
(AFP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 341 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:44Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:43Caption #-43
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:42Caption #256
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:41Caption #-25
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:40Caption #-46
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:39Caption #-19
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:38Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:35Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:31Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:30Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:27Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:25Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:22Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:19Caption #672
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:18Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:17Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:15Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:14Caption #874
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:11Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:10Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:09Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:06Caption #966
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:02Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker12:06:00Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:59Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:58Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:54Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:50Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:47Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:44Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:42Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:38Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:36Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:34Caption #539
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:30Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:27Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:26Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:22Caption #103
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:20Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:18Caption #163
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:17Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:14Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:13Caption #859
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:12Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:11Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:10Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:09Caption #881
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:08Caption #-4
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:07Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:06Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:05Caption #-9
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:04Caption #-52
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:02Caption #840
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:01Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker12:05:00Caption #358
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:59Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:58Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:57Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:56Caption #289
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:55Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:54Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:50Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:46Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:45Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:44Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:43Caption #553
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:42Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:41Caption #789
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:40Caption #411
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:39Caption #925
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:38Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:37Caption #638
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:36Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:35Caption #820
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:34Caption #874
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:33Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:32Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:31Caption #619
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:30Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:29Caption #188
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:26Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:23Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:18Caption #812
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:17Caption #391
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:15Caption #329
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:14Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:11Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:10Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:09Caption #159
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:08Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:07Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:06Caption #903
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:05Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:04Caption #654
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:03Caption #727
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:02Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:01Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker12:04:00Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:59Caption #119
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:58Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:57Caption #949
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:56Caption #188
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:55Caption #844
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:54Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:53Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:52Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:51Caption #632
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:50Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:49Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:48Caption #841
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:46Caption #340
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:45Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:43Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:42Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:41Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:39Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:35Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:34Caption #160
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:31Caption #667
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:30Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:28Caption #537
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:23Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:22Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:20Caption #582
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:18Caption #833
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:17Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:15Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:13Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:10Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:07Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:06Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:05Caption #703
Mr. NonameLurker12:03:02Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:58Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:57Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:55Caption #647
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:52Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:51Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:47Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:42Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:40Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:36Caption #959
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:34Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:31Caption #901
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:27Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:24Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:22Caption #528
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:19Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:18Caption #46
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:15Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:14Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:13Caption #673
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:12Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:11Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:10Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:09Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:08Caption #821
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:07Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:06Caption #-2
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:05Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:04Caption #884
Mr. NonameLurker12:02:01Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:58Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:56Caption #928
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:55Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:54Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:53Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:52Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:51Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:50Caption #817
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:49Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:47Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:43Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:42Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:41Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:40Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:39Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:38Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:37Caption #846
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:35Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:31Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:29Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:28Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:27Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:26Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:25Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:24Caption #306
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:23Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:22Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:20Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:18Caption #609
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:14Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:11Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:07Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:05Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:03Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker12:01:00Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:58Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:56Caption #674
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:54Caption #921
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:51Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:50Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:49Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:48Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:47Caption #107
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:46Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:45Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:44Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:43Caption #659
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:42Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:41Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:40Caption #878
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:34Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:30Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:29Caption #363
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:28Caption #154
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:25Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:23Caption #969
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:22Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:20Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:19Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:16Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:15Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:14Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:13Caption #667
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:11Caption #211
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:09Caption #314
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:08Caption #80
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:07Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:02Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker12:00:00Caption #895
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:59Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:55Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:54Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:53Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:52Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:51Caption #733
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:50Caption #765
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:49Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:48Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:47Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:46Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:45Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:43Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:42Caption #859
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:41Caption #346
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:40Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:39Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:38Caption #351
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:37Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:36Caption #107
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:35Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:34Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:32Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:30Caption #234
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:28Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:25Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:24Caption #908
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:23Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:22Caption #800
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:21Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:20Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:19Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:18Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:15Caption #839
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:11Caption #819
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:08Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:05Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:04Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker11:59:02Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:59Caption #-22
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:56Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:55Caption #884
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:51Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:50Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:47Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:46Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:45Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:44Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:43Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:42Caption #89
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:41Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:40Caption #692
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:39Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:38Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:35Caption #754
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:34Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:30Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:29Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:27Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:23Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:21Caption #673
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:19Caption #840
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:15Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:14Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:13Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:12Caption #944
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:11Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:10Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:09Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:08Caption #912
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:07Caption #649
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:06Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker11:58:03Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:58Caption #754
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:54Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:51Caption #265
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:48Caption #338
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:47Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:45Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:44Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:43Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:42Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:41Caption #199
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:40Caption #943
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:39Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:38Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:37Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:36Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:35Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:34Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:33Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:30Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:26Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:25Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:23Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:18Caption #50
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:14Caption #659
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:11Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:10Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:08Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:06Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:04Caption #796
Mr. NonameLurker11:57:02Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:59Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:57Caption #740
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:55Caption #767
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:54Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:52Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:48Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker11:56:47Caption #263

Board [Post Message]

Someone told me last week that it would do me good to watch Casablanca. I told them that I owned the DVD, and that my calendar at work was currently showing Casablanca. January is Casablanca month, which is pretty damn ironic.

I watched it again on Friday night. I sat in the dark and watched it until it finished at 2am. (Which could explain my weird dream on Saturday morning.) The film teaches you how to be truly noble, how to be strong when you are feeling your weakest. It is a shame that these attributes are so hard to pull off in real life. When it comes to the crunch and your true feelings are on the line, it's almost impossible to let go of something so fragile and precious, even if it is your only choice.

I hope none of you have to make that kind of decision.

On the lighter side, we put together 62 feet of bookcases this weekend and installed most of our books in it. Finally I have a library, I hope Yoyology approves.

Good luck on your interview today Lauren!


There are 27 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Thanks to the great Spike Milligan for the first panel.
<Lauren> The film teaches you about loving and letting go. How to live afterwards, you have to learn on your own.
<shininglion> Mort you are a hopeless romantic. This is why I am in love with you.

*shininglion plots devious ways to get C out of the picture...

<Carol> Lauren, we want you to get the job and be happy, but what will become of us if you have less captioning time? It's just like Casablanca!
<guyPaulo> Of all the web sites in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine....
<yoyology> It's not a library without a cataloging system. How can you know what you've got otherwise? :-)

We currently have about that many books packed onto three bookcases that size (no room for knickknacks on our shelves!). Plus, we have 15-20 liquor boxes full of books in my mother-in-law's basement waiting to be looked through. It's a sickness.

<Lauren> Last time I moved, I got rid of 60 boxes of books. Most I put on a shelf at work and marked them as free. It started a trading library that was really cool. I gave some to the library and some I gave to a homeless shelter. I still have three bookcases and several boxes.
<guyPaulo> That's a good idea Lauren. I think I'll donate my collection of Ferrari repair manuals to the local homeless shelter...
<yoyology> A note from the librarian:

Be aware that items donated to the library rarely make it to the shelf. Unless they are very recent (within the last two years or so) and in excellent condition (no writing in the margins!) the library will probably place them in a book sale or simply discard them. In particular, don't try to give a public library your old college textbooks. They are rarely useful for a general audience. Shelters, coffeehouses, domestic violence centers, etc. are good places to take books you don't want and can't sell, but in a lot of cases, hard as it is to say, it's best just to take them to a recycling center.

<mypalmike> If you happen to live in the San Francisco area or don't mind paying shipping charges, the "Bridge to Asia" program wants college textbooks.
...www.bridge.org...
<Ilsa> Casablanca is one of my favorite movies. So bittersweet.
<Mort> I like my movies like my chocolate and my women.

I should have guessed that everyone who regularly posts here would have a huge collection of books.

<Ilsa> I like my movies and chocolate like my men; deeply rich, foreign, with well developed story line/flavor (and hopefully not too confusing or filled with pesticides).
<Mort> I think I know of someone rich, foreign with a well developed story who could feed you valrhona while you watched Amelie.
<apple juice is a verb> I am so happy that hip-hop has made its way to the Vatican. Now I can say to my parents, "See? God likes it."
<Lauren> Well, I didn't NOT get the job... it's just that no one who was supposed to interview me made it in today because of the weather. Hey, *I* made it in, that ought to be good for something....
<3Suns> Ah, well now you can get your suit back in time. Keep us posted, Lauren.
<Mort> They ought to just give you the job after treating you so badly. Just give me their phone numbers, an Image Gorilla has a lot of sway in this world.
<guyPaulo> ....sigh....I'm just not feeling very funny today....
<Mort> Whats up guy? Tell uncle Mort your woes.
<Mountaineer> It is hard to be funny with so many troubles, I know how that is.
<Mort> I also know how it is. You need to be the happy clown, smiling on the outside, crying on the inside.
<Mountaineer> ...biting your nails down to the quick while trying to remember your name after intensive deprogramming.
<Mort> Juggling pins, each one reminds you of the shape of the woman you once loved -- the one you had to leave behind when you left the Island of Tonga. No wonder you always drop the pins!
Your heartbreak is a high cost for the circus audiences' laughter.
<apple juice is a verb> "Laugh, clown laugh...even though your heart is breaking."
<yoyology> "But Doctor, I am Pagliacci!"
...www.operasj.org...
<guyPaulo> Let's see, I have stress...stress...oh yes, and more stress....(being a professional caption-monkie is hard work!)


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post