[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 01/26/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Britney, you have no talent! No wait, I am wrong, you'd make a very talented hooker!

You are not blessed!

George Bush and cronies, I say to you stupid, stupid, stupid. Seeing someone retarded as you makes me agree with contraception.

You are not blessed!

You my son, are Catholic Idol material.

You are coming to the Vatican.
(AP)
(AFP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 241 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:32Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:31Caption #-61
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:30Caption #-11
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:29Caption #-73
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:28Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:27Caption #905
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:26Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:25Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:24Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:23Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:22Caption #917
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:21Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:20Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:19Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:18Caption #550
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:17Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:16Caption #806
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:15Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:14Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:13Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:12Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:11Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:10Caption #925
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:09Caption #609
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:08Caption #654
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:07Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:06Caption #314
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:05Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:04Caption #532
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:03Caption #674
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:02Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:01Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker12:40:00Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:59Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:58Caption #725
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:57Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:56Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:55Caption #826
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:54Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:53Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:52Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:51Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:51Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:49Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:48Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:47Caption #755
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:46Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:45Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:44Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:43Caption #915
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:42Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:41Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:41Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:39Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:38Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:37Caption #648
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:36Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:35Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:34Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:33Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:32Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:30Caption #996
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:29Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:28Caption #967
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:27Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:26Caption #267
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:25Caption #291
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:24Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:23Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:22Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:21Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:20Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:19Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:18Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:16Caption #889
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:14Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:13Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:12Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:11Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:10Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:09Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:08Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:07Caption #841
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:06Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:05Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:04Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:03Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:02Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:01Caption #202
Mr. NonameLurker12:39:00Caption #-48
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:59Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:58Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:57Caption #788
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:56Caption #406
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:55Caption #659
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:54Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:53Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:52Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:51Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:50Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:49Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:48Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:47Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:46Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:45Caption #655
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:44Caption #829
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:43Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:42Caption #663
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:41Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:40Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:39Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:38Caption #532
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:37Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:36Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:35Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:34Caption #918
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:33Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:32Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:31Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:30Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:29Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:28Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:27Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:26Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:25Caption #571
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:24Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:23Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:22Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:21Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:20Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:19Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:18Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:17Caption #237
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:16Caption #545
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:15Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:14Caption #692
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:13Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:12Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:11Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:10Caption #281
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:09Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:08Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:07Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:06Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:05Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:04Caption #897
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:03Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:02Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:01Caption #810
Mr. NonameLurker12:38:00Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:59Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:58Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:57Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:56Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:55Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:54Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:53Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:52Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:51Caption #710
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:50Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:49Caption #125
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:48Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:46Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:45Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:44Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:43Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:42Caption #82
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:41Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:40Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:39Caption #643
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:38Caption #847
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:37Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:36Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:35Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:34Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:33Caption #231
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:32Caption #490
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:31Caption #-5
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:30Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:29Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:28Caption #355
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:27Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:26Caption #154
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:25Caption #551
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:24Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:23Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:22Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:21Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:20Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:19Caption #351
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:18Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:17Caption #242
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:16Caption #643
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:15Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:14Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:13Caption #642
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:12Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:11Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:10Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:09Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:08Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:07Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:06Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:05Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:04Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:03Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:02Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:01Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker12:37:00Caption #97
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:59Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:58Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:57Caption #865
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:56Caption #674
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:55Caption #647
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:54Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:53Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:52Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:51Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:50Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:49Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:48Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:47Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:46Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:45Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:44Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:43Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:42Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:41Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:40Caption #916
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:39Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:38Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:37Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:36Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:35Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:34Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:33Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:32Caption #673
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:31Caption #788
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:30Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:29Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker12:36:28Caption #408

Board [Post Message]

Someone told me last week that it would do me good to watch Casablanca. I told them that I owned the DVD, and that my calendar at work was currently showing Casablanca. January is Casablanca month, which is pretty damn ironic.

I watched it again on Friday night. I sat in the dark and watched it until it finished at 2am. (Which could explain my weird dream on Saturday morning.) The film teaches you how to be truly noble, how to be strong when you are feeling your weakest. It is a shame that these attributes are so hard to pull off in real life. When it comes to the crunch and your true feelings are on the line, it's almost impossible to let go of something so fragile and precious, even if it is your only choice.

I hope none of you have to make that kind of decision.

On the lighter side, we put together 62 feet of bookcases this weekend and installed most of our books in it. Finally I have a library, I hope Yoyology approves.

Good luck on your interview today Lauren!


There are 27 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Thanks to the great Spike Milligan for the first panel.
<Lauren> The film teaches you about loving and letting go. How to live afterwards, you have to learn on your own.
<shininglion> Mort you are a hopeless romantic. This is why I am in love with you.

*shininglion plots devious ways to get C out of the picture...

<Carol> Lauren, we want you to get the job and be happy, but what will become of us if you have less captioning time? It's just like Casablanca!
<guyPaulo> Of all the web sites in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine....
<yoyology> It's not a library without a cataloging system. How can you know what you've got otherwise? :-)

We currently have about that many books packed onto three bookcases that size (no room for knickknacks on our shelves!). Plus, we have 15-20 liquor boxes full of books in my mother-in-law's basement waiting to be looked through. It's a sickness.

<Lauren> Last time I moved, I got rid of 60 boxes of books. Most I put on a shelf at work and marked them as free. It started a trading library that was really cool. I gave some to the library and some I gave to a homeless shelter. I still have three bookcases and several boxes.
<guyPaulo> That's a good idea Lauren. I think I'll donate my collection of Ferrari repair manuals to the local homeless shelter...
<yoyology> A note from the librarian:

Be aware that items donated to the library rarely make it to the shelf. Unless they are very recent (within the last two years or so) and in excellent condition (no writing in the margins!) the library will probably place them in a book sale or simply discard them. In particular, don't try to give a public library your old college textbooks. They are rarely useful for a general audience. Shelters, coffeehouses, domestic violence centers, etc. are good places to take books you don't want and can't sell, but in a lot of cases, hard as it is to say, it's best just to take them to a recycling center.

<mypalmike> If you happen to live in the San Francisco area or don't mind paying shipping charges, the "Bridge to Asia" program wants college textbooks.
...www.bridge.org...
<Ilsa> Casablanca is one of my favorite movies. So bittersweet.
<Mort> I like my movies like my chocolate and my women.

I should have guessed that everyone who regularly posts here would have a huge collection of books.

<Ilsa> I like my movies and chocolate like my men; deeply rich, foreign, with well developed story line/flavor (and hopefully not too confusing or filled with pesticides).
<Mort> I think I know of someone rich, foreign with a well developed story who could feed you valrhona while you watched Amelie.
<apple juice is a verb> I am so happy that hip-hop has made its way to the Vatican. Now I can say to my parents, "See? God likes it."
<Lauren> Well, I didn't NOT get the job... it's just that no one who was supposed to interview me made it in today because of the weather. Hey, *I* made it in, that ought to be good for something....
<3Suns> Ah, well now you can get your suit back in time. Keep us posted, Lauren.
<Mort> They ought to just give you the job after treating you so badly. Just give me their phone numbers, an Image Gorilla has a lot of sway in this world.
<guyPaulo> ....sigh....I'm just not feeling very funny today....
<Mort> Whats up guy? Tell uncle Mort your woes.
<Mountaineer> It is hard to be funny with so many troubles, I know how that is.
<Mort> I also know how it is. You need to be the happy clown, smiling on the outside, crying on the inside.
<Mountaineer> ...biting your nails down to the quick while trying to remember your name after intensive deprogramming.
<Mort> Juggling pins, each one reminds you of the shape of the woman you once loved -- the one you had to leave behind when you left the Island of Tonga. No wonder you always drop the pins!
Your heartbreak is a high cost for the circus audiences' laughter.
<apple juice is a verb> "Laugh, clown laugh...even though your heart is breaking."
<yoyology> "But Doctor, I am Pagliacci!"
...www.operasj.org...
<guyPaulo> Let's see, I have stress...stress...oh yes, and more stress....(being a professional caption-monkie is hard work!)


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post