[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 01/26/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Britney, you have no talent! No wait, I am wrong, you'd make a very talented hooker!

You are not blessed!

George Bush and cronies, I say to you stupid, stupid, stupid. Seeing someone retarded as you makes me agree with contraception.

You are not blessed!

You my son, are Catholic Idol material.

You are coming to the Vatican.
(AP)
(AFP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 250 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker01:44:06Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker01:44:05Caption #-9
Mr. NonameLurker01:44:03Caption #442
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:57Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:52Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:50Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:49Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:47Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:43Caption #43
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:36Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:34Caption #342
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:33Caption #328
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:32Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:31Caption #489
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:30Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:29Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:28Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:27Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:26Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:25Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:24Caption #193
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:23Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:22Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:21Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:20Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:19Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:17Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:13Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:10Caption #663
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:08Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:05Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:02Caption #451
Mr. NonameLurker01:43:00Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:58Caption #865
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:57Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:56Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:55Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:54Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:53Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:52Caption #588
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:46Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:37Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:35Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:34Caption #588
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:30Caption #515
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:26Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:25Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:22Caption #385
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:18Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:16Caption #946
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:14Caption #-21
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:10Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:09Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:08Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:07Caption #322
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:06Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:05Caption #120
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:04Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:03Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:02Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:01Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker01:42:00Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:59Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:58Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:54Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:44Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:43Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:42Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:41Caption #219
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:39Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:38Caption #555
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:37Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:36Caption #784
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:35Caption #550
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:34Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:33Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:31Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:29Caption #995
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:25Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:24Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:23Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:22Caption #911
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:21Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:20Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:18Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:17Caption #479
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:15Caption #847
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:14Caption #130
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:13Caption #479
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:10Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:09Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:06Caption #561
Mr. NonameLurker01:41:00Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:59Caption #853
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:57Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:53Caption #674
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:52Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:47Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:34Caption #504
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:33Caption #-60
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:32Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:31Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:30Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:29Caption #215
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:28Caption #666
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:27Caption #582
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:26Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:23Caption #626
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:15Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:14Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:10Caption #881
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:08Caption #826
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:06Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:05Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:04Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:03Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:02Caption #643
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:01Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker01:40:00Caption #654
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:59Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:58Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:57Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:56Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:55Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:50Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:46Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:41Caption #-34
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:39Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:35Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:31Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:30Caption #122
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:22Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:21Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:18Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:17Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:11Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:08Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:07Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:05Caption #338
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:03Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:01Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker01:39:00Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:58Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:57Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:56Caption #840
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:55Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:52Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:49Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:46Caption #503
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:41Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:38Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:30Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:29Caption #-96
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:27Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:24Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:21Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:20Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:18Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:15Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:12Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:11Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:08Caption #887
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:02Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:01Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker01:38:00Caption #352
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:59Caption #156
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:58Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:57Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:55Caption #445
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:54Caption #631
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:53Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:52Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:51Caption #880
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:46Caption #748
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:32Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:23Caption #767
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:20Caption #50
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:16Caption #199
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:14Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:07Caption #557
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:04Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:02Caption #555
Mr. NonameLurker01:37:01Caption #343
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:54Caption #844
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:49Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:48Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:47Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:42Caption #935
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:40Caption #783
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:39Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:34Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:32Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:31Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:28Caption #655
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:26Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:23Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:21Caption #654
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:13Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:12Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:10Caption #710
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:03Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker01:36:02Caption #524
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:59Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:57Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:50Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:49Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:48Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:42Caption #240
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:37Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:36Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:35Caption #229
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:34Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:33Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:32Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:28Caption #789
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:24Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:22Caption #691
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:18Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:16Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:15Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:14Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:11Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker01:35:09Caption #747
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:59Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:55Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:53Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:52Caption #897
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:51Caption #672
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:50Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:48Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:45Caption #237
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:44Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:43Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:41Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:39Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:38Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:37Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:36Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:32Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:31Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:30Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:25Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:24Caption #839
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:23Caption #785
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:22Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:19Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:18Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:17Caption #884
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:14Caption #898
Mr. NonameLurker01:34:12Caption #282

Board [Post Message]

Someone told me last week that it would do me good to watch Casablanca. I told them that I owned the DVD, and that my calendar at work was currently showing Casablanca. January is Casablanca month, which is pretty damn ironic.

I watched it again on Friday night. I sat in the dark and watched it until it finished at 2am. (Which could explain my weird dream on Saturday morning.) The film teaches you how to be truly noble, how to be strong when you are feeling your weakest. It is a shame that these attributes are so hard to pull off in real life. When it comes to the crunch and your true feelings are on the line, it's almost impossible to let go of something so fragile and precious, even if it is your only choice.

I hope none of you have to make that kind of decision.

On the lighter side, we put together 62 feet of bookcases this weekend and installed most of our books in it. Finally I have a library, I hope Yoyology approves.

Good luck on your interview today Lauren!


There are 27 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Thanks to the great Spike Milligan for the first panel.
<Lauren> The film teaches you about loving and letting go. How to live afterwards, you have to learn on your own.
<shininglion> Mort you are a hopeless romantic. This is why I am in love with you.

*shininglion plots devious ways to get C out of the picture...

<Carol> Lauren, we want you to get the job and be happy, but what will become of us if you have less captioning time? It's just like Casablanca!
<guyPaulo> Of all the web sites in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine....
<yoyology> It's not a library without a cataloging system. How can you know what you've got otherwise? :-)

We currently have about that many books packed onto three bookcases that size (no room for knickknacks on our shelves!). Plus, we have 15-20 liquor boxes full of books in my mother-in-law's basement waiting to be looked through. It's a sickness.

<Lauren> Last time I moved, I got rid of 60 boxes of books. Most I put on a shelf at work and marked them as free. It started a trading library that was really cool. I gave some to the library and some I gave to a homeless shelter. I still have three bookcases and several boxes.
<guyPaulo> That's a good idea Lauren. I think I'll donate my collection of Ferrari repair manuals to the local homeless shelter...
<yoyology> A note from the librarian:

Be aware that items donated to the library rarely make it to the shelf. Unless they are very recent (within the last two years or so) and in excellent condition (no writing in the margins!) the library will probably place them in a book sale or simply discard them. In particular, don't try to give a public library your old college textbooks. They are rarely useful for a general audience. Shelters, coffeehouses, domestic violence centers, etc. are good places to take books you don't want and can't sell, but in a lot of cases, hard as it is to say, it's best just to take them to a recycling center.

<mypalmike> If you happen to live in the San Francisco area or don't mind paying shipping charges, the "Bridge to Asia" program wants college textbooks.
...www.bridge.org...
<Ilsa> Casablanca is one of my favorite movies. So bittersweet.
<Mort> I like my movies like my chocolate and my women.

I should have guessed that everyone who regularly posts here would have a huge collection of books.

<Ilsa> I like my movies and chocolate like my men; deeply rich, foreign, with well developed story line/flavor (and hopefully not too confusing or filled with pesticides).
<Mort> I think I know of someone rich, foreign with a well developed story who could feed you valrhona while you watched Amelie.
<apple juice is a verb> I am so happy that hip-hop has made its way to the Vatican. Now I can say to my parents, "See? God likes it."
<Lauren> Well, I didn't NOT get the job... it's just that no one who was supposed to interview me made it in today because of the weather. Hey, *I* made it in, that ought to be good for something....
<3Suns> Ah, well now you can get your suit back in time. Keep us posted, Lauren.
<Mort> They ought to just give you the job after treating you so badly. Just give me their phone numbers, an Image Gorilla has a lot of sway in this world.
<guyPaulo> ....sigh....I'm just not feeling very funny today....
<Mort> Whats up guy? Tell uncle Mort your woes.
<Mountaineer> It is hard to be funny with so many troubles, I know how that is.
<Mort> I also know how it is. You need to be the happy clown, smiling on the outside, crying on the inside.
<Mountaineer> ...biting your nails down to the quick while trying to remember your name after intensive deprogramming.
<Mort> Juggling pins, each one reminds you of the shape of the woman you once loved -- the one you had to leave behind when you left the Island of Tonga. No wonder you always drop the pins!
Your heartbreak is a high cost for the circus audiences' laughter.
<apple juice is a verb> "Laugh, clown laugh...even though your heart is breaking."
<yoyology> "But Doctor, I am Pagliacci!"
...www.operasj.org...
<guyPaulo> Let's see, I have stress...stress...oh yes, and more stress....(being a professional caption-monkie is hard work!)


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post