[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 01/19/2004 by guyPaulo
<--  First Choose an alternative caption: <  > Last   -->-->

Oh great. Some pervert snaps my picture just as I adjust my nipples. It's sure to be on mostemailedphotos within the hour.

Wonderful. Now legions of geeks across the world will be "grabbing the mayonnaise fire hose," as they stare at me.

Worst of all, those damn caption monkies will be cackling over me, writing obscene captions, just like the disgusting little primates they are.
(Reuters)
(AP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 317 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:21Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:20Caption #-7
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:19Caption #137
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:18Caption #103
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:17Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:14Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:13Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:10Caption #329
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:08Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:07Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:06Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:05Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:01Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker16:52:00Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:59Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:58Caption #789
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:57Caption #653
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:52Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:50Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:49Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:48Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:45Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:41Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:38Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:33Caption #238
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:32Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:30Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:29Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:26Caption #929
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:25Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:22Caption #908
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:17Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:15Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:14Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:12Caption #540
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:11Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:10Caption #699
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:08Caption #84
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:05Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:04Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker16:51:03Caption #741
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:59Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:58Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:51Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:47Caption #209
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:46Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:43Caption #905
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:42Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:36Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:35Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:29Caption #289
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:24Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:18Caption #262
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:17Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:14Caption #877
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:13Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:12Caption #906
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:08Caption #539
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:05Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker16:50:00Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:59Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:57Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:52Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:50Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:46Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:44Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:40Caption #274
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:39Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:37Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:36Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:33Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:32Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:30Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:29Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:28Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:27Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:26Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:24Caption #461
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:23Caption #455
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:22Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:21Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:20Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:16Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:14Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:13Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:12Caption #840
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:08Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:04Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:03Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker16:49:00Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:56Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:55Caption #853
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:48Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:47Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:46Caption #936
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:44Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:42Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:40Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:38Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:37Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:36Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:33Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:32Caption #217
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:30Caption #63
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:21Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:20Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:19Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:16Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:14Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:08Caption #255
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:06Caption #901
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:04Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker16:48:00Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:55Caption #80
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:53Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:52Caption #894
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:51Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:50Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:48Caption #923
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:47Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:45Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:44Caption #923
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:43Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:40Caption #98
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:39Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:38Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:37Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:36Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:32Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:31Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:30Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:29Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:27Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:25Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:24Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:23Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:22Caption #136
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:21Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:19Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:18Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:17Caption #353
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:16Caption #470
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:15Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:14Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:13Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:12Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:11Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:08Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:06Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:04Caption #964
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:02Caption #282
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:01Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker16:47:00Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:59Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:56Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:55Caption #252
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:52Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:51Caption #873
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:49Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:48Caption #138
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:47Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:46Caption #724
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:45Caption #357
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:44Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:41Caption #154
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:40Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:39Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:36Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:32Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:31Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:21Caption #84
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:20Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:17Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:16Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:14Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:13Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:12Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:11Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:07Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:06Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:04Caption #839
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:03Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:02Caption #873
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:01Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker16:46:00Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:58Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:57Caption #635
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:56Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:55Caption #377
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:53Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:52Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:51Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:48Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:47Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:46Caption #657
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:44Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:43Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:42Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:41Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:40Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:39Caption #540
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:35Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:34Caption #666
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:33Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:32Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:27Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:26Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:24Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:23Caption #834
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:22Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:21Caption #343
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:20Caption #487
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:19Caption #684
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:18Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:17Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:16Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:12Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:10Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:08Caption #462
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:07Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:05Caption #490
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:04Caption #338
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:03Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:02Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:01Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker16:45:00Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:58Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:57Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:56Caption #428
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:55Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:53Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:52Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:49Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:48Caption #-26
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:47Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:47Caption #80
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:45Caption #699
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:42Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:38Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:36Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:35Caption #856
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:34Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:33Caption #80
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:32Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:31Caption #771
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:29Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:28Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:27Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:26Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:24Caption #486
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:22Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:21Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:20Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:16Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:15Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:12Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:11Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:08Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:05Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:04Caption #732
Mr. NonameLurker16:44:03Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:58Caption #737
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:55Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:54Caption #631
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:52Caption #976
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:46Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:44Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:43Caption #108
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:42Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:41Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:40Caption #683
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:39Caption #400
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:38Caption #411
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:37Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:36Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:33Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:32Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:30Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:29Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:28Caption #616
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:24Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:23Caption #890
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:22Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:21Caption #865
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:20Caption #301
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:19Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:18Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:17Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:16Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:15Caption #517
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:14Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:13Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:12Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:06Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:04Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:03Caption #475
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:02Caption #346
Mr. NonameLurker16:43:00Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:58Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:57Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:56Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:55Caption #922
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:49Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:48Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:47Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:44Caption #103
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:42Caption #869
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:41Caption #732
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:40Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:39Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:36Caption #352
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:34Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:32Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:31Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:28Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:24Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker16:42:22Caption #9

Comments on Alternatives [Add Comment]

There are 14 comments for this caption.

<yoyology> This one's really good. Meta, but good, and I give you extra points for the graphic masturbation euphemism.
<No one in particular> Mayonaise fire hose, man I would have never have thought of that. But that picture on the left does kinda make you want to pull ot the hose and put out a fire!
<guyPaulo> Thanks guys, I think that its going to be a good day for the more obscene monkies like me and Elvis.
<mypalmike> I'm looking forward to guy's upcoming book, "Masturbation: A Man's Guide to Squeezing the Easy Cheese"
<ElvisThePelvis> Hehe...mypalmike that is funny.
<guyPaulo> Excuse me while I go "teach the albino dolphin to spit from his blowhole."
<ElvisThePelvis> I plan on some "Lightsaber Practice with Captain Solo" later followed by a little session "Performing the Jedi Hand Trick" and finally I will finish off with some "Test Firing the Death Star".
<Mort> My personal favourite is "Punishing the red headed step child". Funny Guy.
<MLimburg> 'Lay the plumbing'

On a semi-related note, ever taken a Harry Potter novel and replaced the word WAND with the word WANG?

<David Byrden> What the hell are you all talking about?!?!?!?!?!?
<guyPaulo> We're talking about "wrestling the cyclops," or "taming the tan python," or "making out with Rosie Palmer and her 5 sisters."
<David Byrden>  Oh.
<guyPaulo> Also: "jerkin the gerkin," "keeping the census down," "polishing the fleshy torpedo," and "adjusting the throbbing purple pneumatic drill of love."
<mypalmike> You see, when a man and a hand are in love... Well, you'll learn about it when you're a little older.

Add a comment about this alternative caption:
Name:
Vote: What this means
Comment:


Click the monkey to post