[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 02/08/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

We were so poor growing up. All we had was a cow, until Bush's taxes on the poor meant I had to go sell it. All I got from the banker, for our cow, was some "magic seeds".

My mother spanked me hard that night, for believing that the seeds were magical. So I threw the seeds through the window and went to bed hungry and sad.

When I awoke in the morning I couldn't believe what had grown.

Now we are no longer poor and have moved on to harder drugs.
(Reuters)
(Reuters)
(AFP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker07:14:24Scrawled on the board
Mr. NonameLurker07:12:32Scrawled on the board
Mr. NonameLurker07:10:49Scrawled on the board
Mr. NonameLurker07:09:59Scrawled on the board
Mr. NonameLurker07:07:47Scrawled on the board


Current Users

There have been 299 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker21:58:16Caption #-7
Mr. NonameLurker21:58:15Caption #400
Mr. NonameLurker21:58:14Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker21:58:13Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker21:58:12Caption #63
Mr. NonameLurker21:58:11Caption #558
Mr. NonameLurker21:58:07Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker21:58:06Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:59Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:58Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:57Caption #500
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:55Caption #930
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:53Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:50Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:49Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:48Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:44Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:39Caption #391
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:36Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:35Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:34Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:33Caption #767
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:29Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:28Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:25Caption #770
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:23Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:17Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:16Caption #817
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:15Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:11Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:08Caption #517
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:02Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker21:57:01Caption #199
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:57Caption #226
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:56Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:51Caption #38
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:45Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:41Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:40Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:39Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:37Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:36Caption #942
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:32Caption #499
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:30Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:29Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:28Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:27Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:24Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:23Caption #104
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:22Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:21Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:20Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:19Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:18Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:17Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:15Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:14Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:13Caption #634
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:12Caption #946
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:11Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:10Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:09Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:08Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:07Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:06Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:05Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:04Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:03Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:02Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:01Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker21:56:00Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:59Caption #928
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:58Caption #-22
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:57Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:53Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:48Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:47Caption #515
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:43Caption #291
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:37Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:33Caption #995
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:31Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:30Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:29Caption #564
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:28Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:24Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:22Caption #486
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:19Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:18Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:17Caption #628
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:14Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:13Caption #856
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:08Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:07Caption #864
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:05Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker21:55:03Caption #320
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:55Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:52Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:49Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:47Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:43Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:39Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:36Caption #50
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:35Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:34Caption #250
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:33Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:32Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:30Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:29Caption #647
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:28Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:27Caption #950
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:26Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:23Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:21Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:19Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:18Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:16Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:15Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:11Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:03Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker21:54:02Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:59Caption #870
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:58Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:57Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:56Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:55Caption #839
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:54Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:53Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:52Caption #839
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:51Caption #231
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:50Caption #933
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:49Caption #732
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:48Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:47Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:46Caption #957
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:45Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:44Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:43Caption #876
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:42Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:41Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:40Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:39Caption #770
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:38Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:36Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:31Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:29Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:28Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:27Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:25Caption #207
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:24Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:23Caption #643
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:22Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:19Caption #599
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:18Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:17Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:15Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:11Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:10Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:07Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:03Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:01Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker21:53:00Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:59Caption #900
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:58Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:55Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:52Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:50Caption #634
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:47Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:46Caption #59
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:44Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:43Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:39Caption #202
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:38Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:34Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:33Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:32Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:30Caption #880
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:28Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:27Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:26Caption #874
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:25Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:23Caption #940
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:22Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:20Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:18Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:13Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:10Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:06Caption #231
Mr. NonameLurker21:52:03Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:58Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:57Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:55Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:52Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:51Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:50Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:49Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:48Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:47Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:46Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:45Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:44Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:43Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:42Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:41Caption #-2
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:40Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:39Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:38Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:37Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:36Caption #521
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:35Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:34Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:33Caption #890
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:32Caption #857
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:31Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:30Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:28Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:27Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:26Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:22Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:21Caption #724
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:15Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:14Caption #783
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:11Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker21:51:07Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:55Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:50Caption #505
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:49Caption #879
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:43Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:41Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:39Caption #99
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:38Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:37Caption #145
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:33Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:29Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:28Caption #367
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:27Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:26Caption #272
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:25Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:23Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:22Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:17Caption #408
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:13Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:11Caption #869
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:10Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:08Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker21:50:03Caption #170
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:58Caption #471
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:55Caption #875
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:53Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:52Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:50Caption #844
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:48Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:44Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:39Caption #252
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:38Caption #957
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:36Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:32Caption #907
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:31Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:30Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:29Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:28Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:27Caption #229
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:24Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:23Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:21Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:20Caption #505
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:11Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:05Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:04Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:02Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:01Caption #-72
Mr. NonameLurker21:49:00Caption #243
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:57Caption #748
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:56Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:55Caption #325
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:54Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:53Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:52Caption #745
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:51Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:50Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:49Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:49Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:47Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:46Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:43Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:42Caption #66
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:41Caption #212
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:40Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:37Caption #387
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:36Caption #199
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:33Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:32Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:31Caption #202
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:26Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:24Caption #727
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:23Caption #767
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:22Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:20Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:17Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker21:48:16Caption #798

Board [Post Message]

So here I am in my father-in-laws, without a single tool to manipulate images or connect securely to unix.

One thing my father-in-law does have though, is a very cool cat, I have nasty red lacerations all over my body to prove how playful he is. You might not know that I am deadly allergic to cats, another thing you might not know is that I have a stupid tendency to throw common sense out of the window and play with cats...

So Saturday night became sort of strange, in a kind of itchy, sneezy and deadly wheezing way. I also brought my empty asthma inhaler to Oregon, which made it very hard for me to go to sleep, instead I (using my allergy infected brain) had many weird but connected dreams. Here is my dream log:

1 am, finally managed to fall asleep, I dreamt that I had an email from Carol on mostemailed.com. Suddenly as I read it I was at her house, which was a wonderful rose covered cottage. We sat and had tea together, which is strange since I hate tea, she was a 20 something version of Miss Marple. I woke up at 1:30am wheezing.

1:50am fell asleep again, this time I had an email from guyPaulo, again I was dragged (screaming) to his house. He lived on a farm, he was dressed like a hick with a straw coming out of his mouth. We talked about the price of pigs and the uses of chicken gizzards, he made innuendos about pigs and chicken gizzards. I woke up at 2:10am wheezing and wondering why I was dreaming all this.

Fell asleep again at 2.15am, this time I had an email from Lauren, and I was zapped to her very cool brown stone townhouse. Inside it had the most marvelous floors and moldings, Lauren was rollerskating around leaving mad wheel marks on the wood floor. I woke myself up again by coughing.

Once more I managed to fall asleep at around 2:45am, and once more I had an email, this one from Mountaineer. I found myself in a very cozy Mongolian tent/hut made out of Yak skins, there was a large fire inside and Mountaineer gave me a cup of tea with fermented yak butter in, which is again strange since I don't like tea... We toasted a few marshmallows on the fire then she said we needed to spy. So we looked outside the tent and saw a hoard of Mongoloids majestically sweeping across the plains. I woke up again sweating and wheezing.

I fell asleep about 10 minutes later. I received another email. This time I was in a car chase, on the streets of San Francisco I think, the cars were all 1970's Cadilacesque. We were chasing a serial killer, I saw him in the car driving next to me, he looked very intense. I automatically assumed it was Yoyology.

I woke up, it was 4am, and I couldn't make myself sleep anymore after that nightmare and the wheezing in my lungs. So instead I went online to write cryptic comments in peoples livejournals.

Sorry for the bad spelling and grandma.


There are 23 messages for this day.
<guyPaulo> I'm starting to think that the middle photo is a pic of Mort's garage.
<yoyology> My stars! The otter is back!
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Lauren> Carol's place sounds coziest, but I would rather visit the mountaineer abode of your dreams, Mort. You might need to talk to someone about your fear of guy and yoyo.

For the sake of accuracy in your dreams, I must tell you that I do live in a townhouse in the center of a large east coast city. However, my floors are carpeted and the walls are mostly wood (one wall in the living room is brick). There are no moldings anywhere in the house, but I do have an Eames wood burning stove in the living room. The place was designed and built in 1927 by Architect George Daub in a style that is a cross between Art Deco and Mission. It is really cool.

<guyPaulo> Don't fear the farm Mort. Its fun once you get used to it. Bring some girls when you come next time and we'll play "hide the skinny pink hog in the chick(en)'s gizzard until he spits sour cream."
<JulieK> Mort you and I are the same in regards to CATS! They are irresistable.
<guyPaulo> Hehe, here's a link for the "dog-lovers" out there.
...story.news.yahoo.com...
<Lauren> OMG, the one on the far right looks like my dog, only smaller. My little guy weighs 60 pounds. I wonder how much I could get for him in Hanoi...
<Mort> I was just letting you know that you are beginning to infect my dreams.
Mountaineer's place was the best, I spent the most time in that dream. She was easy to hang out with for a spy.
<yoyology> What on earth would make you think I'm a serial killer?
<3Suns> What worries me most about the dog picture is those things on the right side of the table on top of the pile. They look like split watermelons.

I never knew you could go anywere to buy "half a dog"

<Lauren> If they had been saggital cuts, I would have assumed they were for those with smaller families, but those look to be horizontal cross sections. My guess would be that there are just certain dishes where dog butt is the wrong cut.
<Miss Marple> I told Mort that yoyology was responsible for the dead body in the library.
<Jmofwiw> What kind of wine goes with dog?
<yoyology> How about a nice barkundy? Or a Cabernet Sauooooooooovignon?
<yoyology> And, just for the record, one dead patron doesn't make me a serial killer.
<3Suns> Yoyology... in the library... with the lead pipe!
<Jmofwiw> I guess I'd have to check the Whine List.
<yoyology> I always liked the rope.
<guyPaulo> "Barkles" and James Wine Cooler. Thank you for your support.
<guyPaulo> Get it? "Bark" and "Bartles"......
<yoyology> Uhhhhh, nope. I don't get it. Please explain in more detail. Can I get a diagram? I'm more of a visual learner.
<Mort> The serial killer just looked very intense, and I guess to my unconcious mind you come over as intense Yoyo.
<David Byrden> I have to log off in 3 minutes.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post