[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 02/26/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Meditation, not matter how much I try, it's not working for me.

I guess it's my wild kitten mind, it can never keep still.

It's always thinking of the lesbians, wait no this is a nightmare...

...ah heavenly.
(Reuters)
(AP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 300 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:05Caption #-26
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:04Caption #620
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:03Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:02Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:01Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker13:57:00Caption #374
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:59Caption #758
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:58Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:57Caption #800
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:56Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:55Caption #-21
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:54Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:53Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:52Caption #235
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:51Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:50Caption #758
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:47Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:43Caption #252
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:39Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:37Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:36Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:34Caption #311
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:33Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:32Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:31Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:29Caption #649
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:28Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:27Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:26Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:25Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:24Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:23Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:22Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:21Caption #359
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:20Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:19Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:18Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:17Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:16Caption #407
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:15Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:14Caption #544
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:13Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:12Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:11Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:10Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:09Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:08Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:07Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:06Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:05Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:04Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:03Caption #307
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:02Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:01Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker13:56:00Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:59Caption #837
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:58Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:57Caption #374
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:56Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:55Caption #563
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:54Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:53Caption #378
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:52Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:51Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:50Caption #931
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:49Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:48Caption #368
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:47Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:45Caption #260
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:44Caption #549
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:43Caption #516
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:42Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:41Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:40Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:35Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:32Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:29Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:27Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:23Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:22Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:20Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:19Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:17Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:16Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:14Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:13Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:10Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:08Caption #906
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:07Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:03Caption #363
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:01Caption #449
Mr. NonameLurker13:55:00Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:59Caption #426
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:57Caption #799
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:55Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:54Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:53Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:52Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:51Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:50Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:49Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:48Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:47Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:46Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:45Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:44Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:43Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:42Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:41Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:40Caption #202
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:39Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:38Caption #759
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:37Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:36Caption #851
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:35Caption #151
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:34Caption #574
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:33Caption #919
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:32Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:31Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:30Caption #426
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:29Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:28Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:27Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:26Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:25Caption #43
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:24Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:23Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:22Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:21Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:20Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:19Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:18Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:17Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:16Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:15Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:14Caption #354
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:13Caption #836
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:12Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:10Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:08Caption #270
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:05Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker13:54:03Caption #87
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:59Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:56Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:55Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:53Caption #864
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:52Caption #862
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:51Caption #422
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:50Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:48Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:47Caption #140
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:44Caption #-4
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:40Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:39Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:35Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:33Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:32Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:31Caption #-23
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:30Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:27Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:26Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:25Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:24Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:23Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:22Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:21Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:20Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:19Caption #897
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:17Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:15Caption #883
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:14Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:08Caption #-18
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:07Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:03Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:01Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker13:53:00Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:59Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:58Caption #718
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:55Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:52Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:51Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:50Caption #751
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:49Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:47Caption #138
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:45Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:43Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:42Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:41Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:40Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:39Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:35Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:34Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:33Caption #555
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:32Caption #573
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:31Caption #37
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:30Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:29Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:28Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:27Caption #-5
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:25Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:20Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:19Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:18Caption #583
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:16Caption #135
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:15Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:14Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:13Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:12Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:11Caption #196
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:10Caption #600
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:09Caption #400
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:08Caption #720
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:06Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:05Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:04Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:03Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:02Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:01Caption #646
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:00Caption #310
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:59Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:57Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:56Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:55Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:52Caption #750
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:51Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:50Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:48Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:47Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:46Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:45Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:44Caption #368
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:43Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:41Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:39Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:38Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:36Caption #630
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:35Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:34Caption #173
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:32Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:30Caption #391
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:29Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:27Caption #98
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:25Caption #-42
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:23Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:20Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:18Caption #661
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:16Caption #398
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:15Caption #778
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:14Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:12Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:11Caption #760
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:10Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:09Caption #765
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:08Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:07Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:04Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:02Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:01Caption #215
Mr. NonameLurker13:51:00Caption #501
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:59Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:58Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:57Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:56Caption #80
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:54Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:51Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:50Caption #581
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:48Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:47Caption #353
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:46Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:46Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:43Caption #-14
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:40Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:38Caption #817
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:34Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:31Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:29Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:27Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:24Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:22Caption #775
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:20Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:19Caption #483
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:18Caption #-18
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:17Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:16Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:14Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:12Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:08Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:05Caption #728
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:04Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:03Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:02Caption #558
Mr. NonameLurker13:50:01Caption #892
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:58Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:56Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:54Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:52Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:49Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:48Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker13:49:47Caption #141

Board [Post Message]

2am, 3am 4am... I can't tell which, it's the same enclosing darkness, the same hissing silence -- timeless. My eyes are wide open, staring straight into the blackness. I remember doing the same thing when I was three years old, one of my first memories.

Lying in my parents bed in the middle of the night -- both of them sleeping. Staring at the deep silence, listening to the dark noise. If you stare hard enough your brain starts to try and make sense of it all. It tries to give meaning to stray photons, or to the tiny blood cells that flow constantly across your retina. When I was three I imagined the swirling colourful images to be secret aliens, as they blurred in and out of my attention. I watched them carefully as they circled all around me, shutting my eyes down tight whenever they got too close.

Now older, I still lie here, doing the same thing. I love and hate this feeling. I ache for sleep, for the dreams I will have, but I can't yet. Dizzy with fatigue my mind enters a strange place, it becomes odd, odder even than usual. I feel wonderfully dishcloth, and comfortably saucepan.

I welcome it all in, the swirling fuzzy shapes, the static, the sleep deprived imaginations. The patterns my mind discerns are no longer aliens, they are the representations of the dancing thoughts inside my head.

I imagine myself in the dark, sitting in a deep enveloping chair. The chair and I in it, are in the most intelligently imaginative, and creative mind -- a deep well of inspiration. The jitter-bugging patterns become the thoughts and dreams of this fanciful mind fidgeting all around me. Like elaborate dazzling butterflies flitter-flutter, some landing gently on me, allowing glimpses, snatches of marvelous things, sparking my own muse.

It's like every great idea is in here, every book, every piece of music, every painting capable of emulsifying emotions. If only I could just reach and grab more glimpses, but I'm now feeling too warm and comforted to move, like I am being hugged.

I fall asleep finally, dreaming of the owner of such a mind.


There are 30 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Damn it, how can I avoid mentioning lesbians or pussies?
<JulieK> I am pretty sure it is impossible.
<Carol> I would just like to brag that I was dissed by Roger M. yesterday so I am somebody now! 8^)
<guyPaulo> You're definitely a regular now Carol. Getting bashed by Roger was your rite of passage. Don't take it personally though, its Roger's role here at MEP.
<Carol> Yes, I was pleased that it was one of his custom-tailored ones! ...I will feel like a regular if I can post something really sort of crappy and everyone feels free to just go, "meh." [Well, I gotta get to work now.]
<mypalmike> What you need is more fiber. You know, to feel more regular.
<WeAreAllOne> Mike, now that the current user info has been restored, I am able to figure out that you are also Goober???

Can you figure out who I am?

<Jmofwiw> Mike was not Goober. I was Goober. Although I was not "Goober???" or "Goober?"
<ajiav> i didn't have time to say yesterday, but i was Burn-yer-mouth-eriffic, Martin Luther Milk, Eggs Farrakhan, Butt Deadly, and Cinnammon Cooch Candy
<JulieK> Congrats Carol! hehe
<JulieK> Mort I used to call those little dots my "sparkle friends" when I was younger.
<Mort> I am just glad I am not the only one who sees them.
<JulieK> I used to think so and I asked me friends and they were like "what?"
<Stormi> I see them too, provided I've had too much caffine and spend hours on end trying and failing to fall asleep.
<Jellyloo> I learned never to mention stuff like that to friends. I alternately see those dots and fractal patterns and giant splotches of color that morph and converge.
<Mort> I guess we are are all friends here. Friends who see dead people weird blobs.
<Jellyloo> How can you help me if you don't believe me?
<Stormi> I believe you. I think we all have seen some variation of what you've mentioned.
<Mort> Maybe we should start the "People who see things in the dark" club. Where we can discuss the things we see, with everyone believing.
<Stormi> I thought that was what this site is all about.
<jellyloo> Where do I sign up? Will I get unwanted solicitations from people trying to sell me a blindfold subscription?
<Mort> We will meet in the secret tree house in the orchard, just past the muddy field.

Bring good shoes.

<JulieK> Mostly alls I see are dots. Red ones crash in like waves sometimes, and sometimes dots of blue, yellow, and red in different sizes come in. Much like the Wonder Bread bag. Also I try to make green ones but I can't get a green thing any bigger than a little worm thing surrounded by purple. STUPID DOTS
<mypalmike> I think the dots are bacteria swimming on your cornea.
<JulieK> That is kind of gross.
<3Suns> Actually, I've heard that most of the swimmy things you see on the surface of your eye are fragments of broken capillaries. If your eyes go bloodshot for whatever reason, they are more visible.
<Mort> Well there are always capillaries across your eyes obscuring your view. The brain does it's best to remove them before it processes what you are seeing.
<mypalmike> It's bacteria, dammit! That's my story and I'm sticking with it!
<obtuse> I miss MEP on weekends... :(
<Mort> I have been thinking of ways to get this working on the weekend too, but I can not do it.

BTW I will not be here on Monday, I will be in Disneyland. So I will post Monday's caption early on Sunday instead.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post