[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 02/26/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Meditation, not matter how much I try, it's not working for me.

I guess it's my wild kitten mind, it can never keep still.

It's always thinking of the lesbians, wait no this is a nightmare...

...ah heavenly.
(Reuters)
(AP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 301 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:49Caption #-12
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:48Caption #509
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:46Caption #632
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:45Caption #334
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:44Caption #322
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:43Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:41Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:40Caption #907
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:39Caption #928
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:38Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:37Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:36Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:35Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:34Caption #214
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:33Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:32Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:30Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:29Caption #389
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:28Caption #725
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:26Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:25Caption #419
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:24Caption #677
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:22Caption #758
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:21Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:20Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:19Caption #326
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:17Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:16Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:14Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:13Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:12Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:09Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:08Caption #894
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:04Caption #211
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:03Caption #176
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:02Caption #677
Mr. NonameLurker18:04:00Caption #60
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:59Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:58Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:56Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:53Caption #249
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:52Caption #428
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:51Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:50Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:49Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:48Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:47Caption #324
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:44Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:43Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:40Caption #834
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:39Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:38Caption #856
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:37Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:36Caption #-32
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:34Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:33Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:32Caption #655
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:28Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:25Caption #463
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:24Caption #931
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:23Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:20Caption #51
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:19Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:18Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:16Caption #721
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:15Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:12Caption #266
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:11Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:10Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:08Caption #826
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:07Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:04Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:03Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker18:03:00Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:58Caption #567
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:57Caption #773
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:56Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:55Caption #361
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:52Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:51Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:50Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:48Caption #41
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:47Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:44Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:41Caption #459
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:40Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:39Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:36Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:32Caption #841
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:28Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:24Caption #450
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:23Caption #682
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:22Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:21Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:20Caption #-89
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:19Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:16Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:15Caption #865
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:13Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:12Caption #848
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:11Caption #-41
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:10Caption #436
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:09Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:08Caption #846
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:06Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:04Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:02Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker18:02:00Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:59Caption #71
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:58Caption #502
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:57Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:56Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:55Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:54Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:53Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:52Caption #89
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:51Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:50Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:49Caption #895
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:48Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:44Caption #342
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:40Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:38Caption #555
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:37Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:36Caption #640
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:35Caption #976
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:34Caption #279
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:32Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:29Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:28Caption #50
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:27Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:25Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:24Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:23Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:21Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:20Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:19Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:18Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:16Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:13Caption #878
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:12Caption #244
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:08Caption #580
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:06Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:04Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:03Caption #548
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:02Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker18:01:00Caption #772
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:56Caption #884
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:55Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:52Caption #765
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:48Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:47Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:44Caption #582
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:40Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:39Caption #342
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:38Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:37Caption #794
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:36Caption #792
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:35Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:34Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:33Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:32Caption #304
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:30Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:28Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:24Caption #815
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:21Caption #917
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:18Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:17Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:16Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:15Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:14Caption #148
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:13Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:12Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:08Caption #303
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:07Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:06Caption #712
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:04Caption #323
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:01Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker18:00:00Caption #489
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:56Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:54Caption #702
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:53Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:52Caption #831
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:51Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:49Caption #-65
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:47Caption #805
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:44Caption #597
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:41Caption #449
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:40Caption #446
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:39Caption #823
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:39Caption #300
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:37Caption #808
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:36Caption #230
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:33Caption #329
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:32Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:31Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:30Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:29Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:28Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:27Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:26Caption #826
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:25Caption #558
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:24Caption #284
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:23Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:22Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:21Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:20Caption #752
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:19Caption #376
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:18Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:17Caption #385
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:16Caption #855
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:15Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:14Caption #781
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:13Caption #552
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:12Caption #397
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:10Caption #67
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:09Caption #738
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:08Caption #897
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:07Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:06Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:05Caption #907
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:04Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:03Caption #443
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:02Caption #239
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:01Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker17:59:00Caption #327
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:59Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:58Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:56Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:54Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:53Caption #660
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:52Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:50Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:48Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:47Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:46Caption #421
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:45Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:44Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:43Caption #386
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:42Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:41Caption #941
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:40Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:39Caption #962
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:38Caption #305
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:37Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:36Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:35Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:34Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:33Caption #97
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:32Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:31Caption #511
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:30Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:29Caption #72
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:28Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:27Caption #627
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:26Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:25Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:24Caption #424
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:22Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:21Caption #774
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:20Caption #292
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:19Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:18Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:17Caption #430
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:16Caption #856
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:15Caption #418
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:14Caption #789
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:13Caption #744
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:12Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:11Caption #791
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:10Caption #159
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:08Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:06Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:05Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:04Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:02Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker17:58:00Caption #862
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:57Caption #332
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:54Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:52Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:51Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:50Caption #773
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:49Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:48Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:47Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:46Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:44Caption #171
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:43Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:41Caption #946
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:40Caption #372
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:36Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:35Caption #587
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:34Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:33Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:32Caption #762
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:31Caption #118
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:30Caption #11
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:29Caption #539
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:28Caption #486
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:24Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker17:57:23Caption #250

Board [Post Message]

2am, 3am 4am... I can't tell which, it's the same enclosing darkness, the same hissing silence -- timeless. My eyes are wide open, staring straight into the blackness. I remember doing the same thing when I was three years old, one of my first memories.

Lying in my parents bed in the middle of the night -- both of them sleeping. Staring at the deep silence, listening to the dark noise. If you stare hard enough your brain starts to try and make sense of it all. It tries to give meaning to stray photons, or to the tiny blood cells that flow constantly across your retina. When I was three I imagined the swirling colourful images to be secret aliens, as they blurred in and out of my attention. I watched them carefully as they circled all around me, shutting my eyes down tight whenever they got too close.

Now older, I still lie here, doing the same thing. I love and hate this feeling. I ache for sleep, for the dreams I will have, but I can't yet. Dizzy with fatigue my mind enters a strange place, it becomes odd, odder even than usual. I feel wonderfully dishcloth, and comfortably saucepan.

I welcome it all in, the swirling fuzzy shapes, the static, the sleep deprived imaginations. The patterns my mind discerns are no longer aliens, they are the representations of the dancing thoughts inside my head.

I imagine myself in the dark, sitting in a deep enveloping chair. The chair and I in it, are in the most intelligently imaginative, and creative mind -- a deep well of inspiration. The jitter-bugging patterns become the thoughts and dreams of this fanciful mind fidgeting all around me. Like elaborate dazzling butterflies flitter-flutter, some landing gently on me, allowing glimpses, snatches of marvelous things, sparking my own muse.

It's like every great idea is in here, every book, every piece of music, every painting capable of emulsifying emotions. If only I could just reach and grab more glimpses, but I'm now feeling too warm and comforted to move, like I am being hugged.

I fall asleep finally, dreaming of the owner of such a mind.


There are 30 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Damn it, how can I avoid mentioning lesbians or pussies?
<JulieK> I am pretty sure it is impossible.
<Carol> I would just like to brag that I was dissed by Roger M. yesterday so I am somebody now! 8^)
<guyPaulo> You're definitely a regular now Carol. Getting bashed by Roger was your rite of passage. Don't take it personally though, its Roger's role here at MEP.
<Carol> Yes, I was pleased that it was one of his custom-tailored ones! ...I will feel like a regular if I can post something really sort of crappy and everyone feels free to just go, "meh." [Well, I gotta get to work now.]
<mypalmike> What you need is more fiber. You know, to feel more regular.
<WeAreAllOne> Mike, now that the current user info has been restored, I am able to figure out that you are also Goober???

Can you figure out who I am?

<Jmofwiw> Mike was not Goober. I was Goober. Although I was not "Goober???" or "Goober?"
<ajiav> i didn't have time to say yesterday, but i was Burn-yer-mouth-eriffic, Martin Luther Milk, Eggs Farrakhan, Butt Deadly, and Cinnammon Cooch Candy
<JulieK> Congrats Carol! hehe
<JulieK> Mort I used to call those little dots my "sparkle friends" when I was younger.
<Mort> I am just glad I am not the only one who sees them.
<JulieK> I used to think so and I asked me friends and they were like "what?"
<Stormi> I see them too, provided I've had too much caffine and spend hours on end trying and failing to fall asleep.
<Jellyloo> I learned never to mention stuff like that to friends. I alternately see those dots and fractal patterns and giant splotches of color that morph and converge.
<Mort> I guess we are are all friends here. Friends who see dead people weird blobs.
<Jellyloo> How can you help me if you don't believe me?
<Stormi> I believe you. I think we all have seen some variation of what you've mentioned.
<Mort> Maybe we should start the "People who see things in the dark" club. Where we can discuss the things we see, with everyone believing.
<Stormi> I thought that was what this site is all about.
<jellyloo> Where do I sign up? Will I get unwanted solicitations from people trying to sell me a blindfold subscription?
<Mort> We will meet in the secret tree house in the orchard, just past the muddy field.

Bring good shoes.

<JulieK> Mostly alls I see are dots. Red ones crash in like waves sometimes, and sometimes dots of blue, yellow, and red in different sizes come in. Much like the Wonder Bread bag. Also I try to make green ones but I can't get a green thing any bigger than a little worm thing surrounded by purple. STUPID DOTS
<mypalmike> I think the dots are bacteria swimming on your cornea.
<JulieK> That is kind of gross.
<3Suns> Actually, I've heard that most of the swimmy things you see on the surface of your eye are fragments of broken capillaries. If your eyes go bloodshot for whatever reason, they are more visible.
<Mort> Well there are always capillaries across your eyes obscuring your view. The brain does it's best to remove them before it processes what you are seeing.
<mypalmike> It's bacteria, dammit! That's my story and I'm sticking with it!
<obtuse> I miss MEP on weekends... :(
<Mort> I have been thinking of ways to get this working on the weekend too, but I can not do it.

BTW I will not be here on Monday, I will be in Disneyland. So I will post Monday's caption early on Sunday instead.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post