[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 02/26/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Meditation, not matter how much I try, it's not working for me.

I guess it's my wild kitten mind, it can never keep still.

It's always thinking of the lesbians, wait no this is a nightmare...

...ah heavenly.
(Reuters)
(AP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 296 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker05:47:10Caption #-7
Mr. NonameLurker05:47:09Caption #789
Mr. NonameLurker05:47:07Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker05:47:06Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker05:47:02Caption #449
Mr. NonameLurker05:47:01Caption #666
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:59Caption #246
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:56Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:55Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:52Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:50Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:48Caption #241
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:47Caption #526
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:46Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:44Caption #152
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:42Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:39Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:37Caption #812
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:34Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:33Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:32Caption #656
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:31Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:30Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:27Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:19Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:16Caption #183
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:15Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:14Caption #512
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:11Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:07Caption #731
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:05Caption #108
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:04Caption #735
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:03Caption #983
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:02Caption #250
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:01Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker05:46:00Caption #536
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:59Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:58Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:57Caption #-49
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:56Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:55Caption #722
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:48Caption #651
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:47Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:43Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:41Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:39Caption #817
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:37Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:31Caption #887
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:27Caption #473
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:26Caption #940
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:25Caption #98
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:23Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:21Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:19Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:11Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:09Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:07Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:04Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker05:45:03Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:59Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:58Caption #680
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:57Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:56Caption #709
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:55Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:51Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:47Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:43Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:35Caption #195
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:31Caption #892
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:27Caption #605
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:26Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:24Caption #275
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:22Caption #521
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:21Caption #243
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:19Caption #286
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:17Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:15Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:13Caption #400
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:12Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:10Caption #465
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:08Caption #238
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:06Caption #372
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:04Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:03Caption #775
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:02Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker05:44:01Caption #470
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:59Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:57Caption #161
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:56Caption #439
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:55Caption #821
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:52Caption #873
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:51Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:50Caption #822
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:48Caption #575
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:43Caption #329
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:39Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:37Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:35Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:31Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:23Caption #812
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:19Caption #324
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:16Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:14Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:13Caption #807
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:11Caption #880
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:10Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:07Caption #800
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:06Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:03Caption #189
Mr. NonameLurker05:43:00Caption #182
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:55Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:51Caption #302
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:47Caption #761
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:43Caption #861
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:42Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:41Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:40Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:39Caption #23
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:36Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:35Caption #204
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:31Caption #539
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:28Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:27Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:23Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:16Caption #647
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:15Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:07Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:03Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker05:42:01Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:59Caption #101
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:58Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:56Caption #316
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:55Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:51Caption #821
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:46Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:45Caption #-11
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:43Caption #871
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:40Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:38Caption #848
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:35Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:32Caption #333
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:31Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:30Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:29Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:27Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:25Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:23Caption #205
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:21Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:20Caption #142
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:19Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:17Caption #871
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:15Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:12Caption #265
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:07Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:04Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:03Caption #776
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:01Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker05:41:00Caption #622
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:59Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:56Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:55Caption #698
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:54Caption #481
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:51Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:47Caption #151
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:44Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:43Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:39Caption #111
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:35Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:32Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:27Caption #175
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:20Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:19Caption #814
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:15Caption #523
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:11Caption #687
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:08Caption #942
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:07Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:06Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:03Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:02Caption #53
Mr. NonameLurker05:40:01Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:59Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:55Caption #777
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:54Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:51Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:45Caption #297
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:43Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:42Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:39Caption #470
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:35Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:32Caption #420
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:31Caption #885
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:30Caption #800
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:29Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:27Caption #401
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:17Caption #220
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:16Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:15Caption #423
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:11Caption #810
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:10Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:09Caption #248
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:05Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:04Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:01Caption #730
Mr. NonameLurker05:39:00Caption #582
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:59Caption #29
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:58Caption #515
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:57Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:56Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:55Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:54Caption #833
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:53Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:52Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:51Caption #437
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:50Caption #562
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:49Caption #58
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:48Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:47Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:46Caption #570
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:45Caption #537
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:44Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:43Caption #896
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:42Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:41Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:36Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:27Caption #603
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:24Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:20Caption #899
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:19Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:18Caption #67
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:17Caption #584
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:16Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:15Caption #347
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:14Caption #945
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:13Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:12Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:11Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:10Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:10Caption #69
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:08Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:07Caption #556
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:06Caption #102
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:05Caption #475
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:04Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:03Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:02Caption #487
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:01Caption #348
Mr. NonameLurker05:38:00Caption #396
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:59Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:58Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:57Caption #141
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:56Caption #850
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:55Caption #223
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:54Caption #70
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:53Caption #904
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:52Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:51Caption #186
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:50Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:49Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:48Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:47Caption #756
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:46Caption #477
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:45Caption #553
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:44Caption #469
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:43Caption #107
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:42Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:41Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:40Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:39Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:38Caption #614
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:37Caption #261
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:36Caption #201
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:35Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:34Caption #22
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:33Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:33Caption #724
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:31Caption #33
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:30Caption #268
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:30Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:28Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:27Caption #192
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:26Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:25Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:24Caption #344
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:23Caption #428
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:22Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:21Caption #257
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:20Caption #558
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:19Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:18Caption #15
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:17Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:16Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:15Caption #965
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:14Caption #154
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:13Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:11Caption #827
Mr. NonameLurker05:37:10Caption #858

Board [Post Message]

2am, 3am 4am... I can't tell which, it's the same enclosing darkness, the same hissing silence -- timeless. My eyes are wide open, staring straight into the blackness. I remember doing the same thing when I was three years old, one of my first memories.

Lying in my parents bed in the middle of the night -- both of them sleeping. Staring at the deep silence, listening to the dark noise. If you stare hard enough your brain starts to try and make sense of it all. It tries to give meaning to stray photons, or to the tiny blood cells that flow constantly across your retina. When I was three I imagined the swirling colourful images to be secret aliens, as they blurred in and out of my attention. I watched them carefully as they circled all around me, shutting my eyes down tight whenever they got too close.

Now older, I still lie here, doing the same thing. I love and hate this feeling. I ache for sleep, for the dreams I will have, but I can't yet. Dizzy with fatigue my mind enters a strange place, it becomes odd, odder even than usual. I feel wonderfully dishcloth, and comfortably saucepan.

I welcome it all in, the swirling fuzzy shapes, the static, the sleep deprived imaginations. The patterns my mind discerns are no longer aliens, they are the representations of the dancing thoughts inside my head.

I imagine myself in the dark, sitting in a deep enveloping chair. The chair and I in it, are in the most intelligently imaginative, and creative mind -- a deep well of inspiration. The jitter-bugging patterns become the thoughts and dreams of this fanciful mind fidgeting all around me. Like elaborate dazzling butterflies flitter-flutter, some landing gently on me, allowing glimpses, snatches of marvelous things, sparking my own muse.

It's like every great idea is in here, every book, every piece of music, every painting capable of emulsifying emotions. If only I could just reach and grab more glimpses, but I'm now feeling too warm and comforted to move, like I am being hugged.

I fall asleep finally, dreaming of the owner of such a mind.


There are 30 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Damn it, how can I avoid mentioning lesbians or pussies?
<JulieK> I am pretty sure it is impossible.
<Carol> I would just like to brag that I was dissed by Roger M. yesterday so I am somebody now! 8^)
<guyPaulo> You're definitely a regular now Carol. Getting bashed by Roger was your rite of passage. Don't take it personally though, its Roger's role here at MEP.
<Carol> Yes, I was pleased that it was one of his custom-tailored ones! ...I will feel like a regular if I can post something really sort of crappy and everyone feels free to just go, "meh." [Well, I gotta get to work now.]
<mypalmike> What you need is more fiber. You know, to feel more regular.
<WeAreAllOne> Mike, now that the current user info has been restored, I am able to figure out that you are also Goober???

Can you figure out who I am?

<Jmofwiw> Mike was not Goober. I was Goober. Although I was not "Goober???" or "Goober?"
<ajiav> i didn't have time to say yesterday, but i was Burn-yer-mouth-eriffic, Martin Luther Milk, Eggs Farrakhan, Butt Deadly, and Cinnammon Cooch Candy
<JulieK> Congrats Carol! hehe
<JulieK> Mort I used to call those little dots my "sparkle friends" when I was younger.
<Mort> I am just glad I am not the only one who sees them.
<JulieK> I used to think so and I asked me friends and they were like "what?"
<Stormi> I see them too, provided I've had too much caffine and spend hours on end trying and failing to fall asleep.
<Jellyloo> I learned never to mention stuff like that to friends. I alternately see those dots and fractal patterns and giant splotches of color that morph and converge.
<Mort> I guess we are are all friends here. Friends who see dead people weird blobs.
<Jellyloo> How can you help me if you don't believe me?
<Stormi> I believe you. I think we all have seen some variation of what you've mentioned.
<Mort> Maybe we should start the "People who see things in the dark" club. Where we can discuss the things we see, with everyone believing.
<Stormi> I thought that was what this site is all about.
<jellyloo> Where do I sign up? Will I get unwanted solicitations from people trying to sell me a blindfold subscription?
<Mort> We will meet in the secret tree house in the orchard, just past the muddy field.

Bring good shoes.

<JulieK> Mostly alls I see are dots. Red ones crash in like waves sometimes, and sometimes dots of blue, yellow, and red in different sizes come in. Much like the Wonder Bread bag. Also I try to make green ones but I can't get a green thing any bigger than a little worm thing surrounded by purple. STUPID DOTS
<mypalmike> I think the dots are bacteria swimming on your cornea.
<JulieK> That is kind of gross.
<3Suns> Actually, I've heard that most of the swimmy things you see on the surface of your eye are fragments of broken capillaries. If your eyes go bloodshot for whatever reason, they are more visible.
<Mort> Well there are always capillaries across your eyes obscuring your view. The brain does it's best to remove them before it processes what you are seeing.
<mypalmike> It's bacteria, dammit! That's my story and I'm sticking with it!
<obtuse> I miss MEP on weekends... :(
<Mort> I have been thinking of ways to get this working on the weekend too, but I can not do it.

BTW I will not be here on Monday, I will be in Disneyland. So I will post Monday's caption early on Sunday instead.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post