[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 02/26/2004 by Mort
<--  First Choose an alternative caption:  > Last   -->-->

Meditation, not matter how much I try, it's not working for me.

I guess it's my wild kitten mind, it can never keep still.

It's always thinking of the lesbians, wait no this is a nightmare...

...ah heavenly.
(Reuters)
(AP)
(AP)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 300 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:35Caption #-40
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:34Caption #479
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:33Caption #810
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:32Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:31Caption #432
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:30Caption #517
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:29Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:28Caption #157
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:25Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:22Caption #503
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:20Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:19Caption #809
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:16Caption #510
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:10Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:09Caption #218
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:07Caption #560
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:04Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker14:37:02Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:58Caption #932
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:57Caption #843
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:55Caption #433
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:54Caption #843
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:53Caption #97
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:52Caption #641
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:51Caption #746
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:50Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:49Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:48Caption #576
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:47Caption #277
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:46Caption #83
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:45Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:44Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:41Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:40Caption #353
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:39Caption #441
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:38Caption #99
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:37Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:36Caption #818
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:35Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:34Caption #571
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:33Caption #13
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:32Caption #21
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:31Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:30Caption #742
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:25Caption #384
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:22Caption #639
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:20Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:17Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:14Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:13Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:12Caption #366
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:11Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:10Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:09Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:08Caption #362
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:07Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:06Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:05Caption #360
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:04Caption #155
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:03Caption #278
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:02Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker14:36:00Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:59Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:58Caption #643
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:57Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:56Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:55Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:54Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:53Caption #388
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:52Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:51Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:50Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:44Caption #93
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:41Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:40Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:39Caption #82
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:38Caption #453
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:36Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:33Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:29Caption #769
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:26Caption #919
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:21Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:20Caption #482
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:17Caption #919
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:10Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:08Caption #461
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:05Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker14:35:03Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:59Caption #829
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:58Caption #903
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:57Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:56Caption #839
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:55Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:54Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:53Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:52Caption #596
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:51Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:50Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:49Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:48Caption #874
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:47Caption #73
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:46Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:45Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:44Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:43Caption #4
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:42Caption #287
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:41Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:40Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:39Caption #946
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:38Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:37Caption #123
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:36Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:35Caption #394
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:34Caption #258
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:31Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:30Caption #900
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:28Caption #630
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:27Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:25Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:24Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:22Caption #689
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:19Caption #668
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:17Caption #571
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:16Caption #63
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:15Caption #35
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:14Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:13Caption #527
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:12Caption #147
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:11Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:10Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:09Caption #853
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:08Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:07Caption #74
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:06Caption #435
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:05Caption #571
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:04Caption #929
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:03Caption #664
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:02Caption #447
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:01Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker14:34:00Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:57Caption #755
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:54Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:52Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:50Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:46Caption #860
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:43Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:42Caption #469
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:39Caption #271
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:37Caption #194
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:35Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:32Caption #774
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:30Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:28Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:27Caption #271
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:26Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:25Caption #821
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:24Caption #96
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:20Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:18Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:15Caption #615
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:13Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:10Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:05Caption #792
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:04Caption #786
Mr. NonameLurker14:33:02Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:57Caption #249
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:54Caption #460
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:52Caption #208
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:48Caption #541
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:47Caption #797
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:43Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:41Caption #122
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:40Caption #33
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:37Caption #249
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:34Caption #8
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:33Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:30Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:25Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:24Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:23Caption #337
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:21Caption #739
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:19Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:18Caption #535
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:17Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:15Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:13Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:10Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:09Caption #849
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:06Caption #693
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:05Caption #794
Mr. NonameLurker14:32:01Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:57Caption #794
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:55Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:53Caption #675
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:49Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:45Caption #379
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:44Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:42Caption #67
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:41Caption #339
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:39Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:37Caption #711
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:35Caption #146
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:34Caption #381
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:33Caption #713
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:31Caption #63
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:29Caption #276
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:23Caption #116
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:21Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:19Caption #438
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:17Caption #26
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:08Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:06Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker14:31:01Caption #912
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:58Caption #518
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:56Caption #231
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:55Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:54Caption #952
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:53Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:51Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:50Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:49Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:46Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:44Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:41Caption #134
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:37Caption #434
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:35Caption #800
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:34Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:31Caption #399
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:29Caption #859
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:28Caption #44
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:24Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:20Caption #577
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:18Caption #478
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:17Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:13Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:09Caption #697
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:06Caption #566
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:05Caption #753
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:03Caption #144
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:02Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker14:30:00Caption #315
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:57Caption #715
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:54Caption #553
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:51Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:47Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:45Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:37Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:33Caption #290
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:32Caption #830
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:31Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:29Caption #382
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:25Caption #883
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:24Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:23Caption #283
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:21Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:19Caption #299
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:17Caption #583
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:16Caption #670
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:15Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:14Caption #219
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:13Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:12Caption #440
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:08Caption #772
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:06Caption #131
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:05Caption #213
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:04Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:03Caption #638
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:02Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:01Caption #488
Mr. NonameLurker14:29:00Caption #367
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:53Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:51Caption #295
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:49Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:48Caption #613
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:45Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:41Caption #479
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:37Caption #629
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:34Caption #903
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:30Caption #98
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:29Caption #569
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:25Caption #903
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:19Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:18Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:17Caption #656
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:13Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:12Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:09Caption #884
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:05Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker14:28:02Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:57Caption #316
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:56Caption #84
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:55Caption #531
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:54Caption #743
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:53Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:52Caption #62
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:48Caption #621
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:45Caption #729
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:44Caption #375
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:41Caption #811
Mr. NonameLurker14:27:38Caption #631

Board [Post Message]

2am, 3am 4am... I can't tell which, it's the same enclosing darkness, the same hissing silence -- timeless. My eyes are wide open, staring straight into the blackness. I remember doing the same thing when I was three years old, one of my first memories.

Lying in my parents bed in the middle of the night -- both of them sleeping. Staring at the deep silence, listening to the dark noise. If you stare hard enough your brain starts to try and make sense of it all. It tries to give meaning to stray photons, or to the tiny blood cells that flow constantly across your retina. When I was three I imagined the swirling colourful images to be secret aliens, as they blurred in and out of my attention. I watched them carefully as they circled all around me, shutting my eyes down tight whenever they got too close.

Now older, I still lie here, doing the same thing. I love and hate this feeling. I ache for sleep, for the dreams I will have, but I can't yet. Dizzy with fatigue my mind enters a strange place, it becomes odd, odder even than usual. I feel wonderfully dishcloth, and comfortably saucepan.

I welcome it all in, the swirling fuzzy shapes, the static, the sleep deprived imaginations. The patterns my mind discerns are no longer aliens, they are the representations of the dancing thoughts inside my head.

I imagine myself in the dark, sitting in a deep enveloping chair. The chair and I in it, are in the most intelligently imaginative, and creative mind -- a deep well of inspiration. The jitter-bugging patterns become the thoughts and dreams of this fanciful mind fidgeting all around me. Like elaborate dazzling butterflies flitter-flutter, some landing gently on me, allowing glimpses, snatches of marvelous things, sparking my own muse.

It's like every great idea is in here, every book, every piece of music, every painting capable of emulsifying emotions. If only I could just reach and grab more glimpses, but I'm now feeling too warm and comforted to move, like I am being hugged.

I fall asleep finally, dreaming of the owner of such a mind.


There are 30 messages for this day.
<David Byrden> Damn it, how can I avoid mentioning lesbians or pussies?
<JulieK> I am pretty sure it is impossible.
<Carol> I would just like to brag that I was dissed by Roger M. yesterday so I am somebody now! 8^)
<guyPaulo> You're definitely a regular now Carol. Getting bashed by Roger was your rite of passage. Don't take it personally though, its Roger's role here at MEP.
<Carol> Yes, I was pleased that it was one of his custom-tailored ones! ...I will feel like a regular if I can post something really sort of crappy and everyone feels free to just go, "meh." [Well, I gotta get to work now.]
<mypalmike> What you need is more fiber. You know, to feel more regular.
<WeAreAllOne> Mike, now that the current user info has been restored, I am able to figure out that you are also Goober???

Can you figure out who I am?

<Jmofwiw> Mike was not Goober. I was Goober. Although I was not "Goober???" or "Goober?"
<ajiav> i didn't have time to say yesterday, but i was Burn-yer-mouth-eriffic, Martin Luther Milk, Eggs Farrakhan, Butt Deadly, and Cinnammon Cooch Candy
<JulieK> Congrats Carol! hehe
<JulieK> Mort I used to call those little dots my "sparkle friends" when I was younger.
<Mort> I am just glad I am not the only one who sees them.
<JulieK> I used to think so and I asked me friends and they were like "what?"
<Stormi> I see them too, provided I've had too much caffine and spend hours on end trying and failing to fall asleep.
<Jellyloo> I learned never to mention stuff like that to friends. I alternately see those dots and fractal patterns and giant splotches of color that morph and converge.
<Mort> I guess we are are all friends here. Friends who see dead people weird blobs.
<Jellyloo> How can you help me if you don't believe me?
<Stormi> I believe you. I think we all have seen some variation of what you've mentioned.
<Mort> Maybe we should start the "People who see things in the dark" club. Where we can discuss the things we see, with everyone believing.
<Stormi> I thought that was what this site is all about.
<jellyloo> Where do I sign up? Will I get unwanted solicitations from people trying to sell me a blindfold subscription?
<Mort> We will meet in the secret tree house in the orchard, just past the muddy field.

Bring good shoes.

<JulieK> Mostly alls I see are dots. Red ones crash in like waves sometimes, and sometimes dots of blue, yellow, and red in different sizes come in. Much like the Wonder Bread bag. Also I try to make green ones but I can't get a green thing any bigger than a little worm thing surrounded by purple. STUPID DOTS
<mypalmike> I think the dots are bacteria swimming on your cornea.
<JulieK> That is kind of gross.
<3Suns> Actually, I've heard that most of the swimmy things you see on the surface of your eye are fragments of broken capillaries. If your eyes go bloodshot for whatever reason, they are more visible.
<Mort> Well there are always capillaries across your eyes obscuring your view. The brain does it's best to remove them before it processes what you are seeing.
<mypalmike> It's bacteria, dammit! That's my story and I'm sticking with it!
<obtuse> I miss MEP on weekends... :(
<Mort> I have been thinking of ways to get this working on the weekend too, but I can not do it.

BTW I will not be here on Monday, I will be in Disneyland. So I will post Monday's caption early on Sunday instead.


Post message:
Name:
Message:

Click the monkey to post