[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 11/14/2005 by Mort
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Dermatological warfare is erupting!

Evil black head warriors and vicious white head tormentors give no quarter to young nubile skin.

Witness as this lady has to cover her T Zone with care.

But luckily a member of the Squeeze Squad is eager to help her out!i

Join up NOW!


The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


These 5 things happened most recently.
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apple juice is a verbCaption Monkie18:02:57Alternatiphized #23
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Board [Post Message]

Sorry for the Lapse in time: vacation and eviction. I'm currently collecting all the "tions" I can, next I am going for claymation and wartime ration.

There are 16 messages for this day.
<Axolotl> New pics? Mort is back from the Monkey bin vaction?!
<Lauren> Mort, I have long known that there is a community on the web for every imaginable perversion out there, but that link took me to one even I could not have imagined. WTF!
<Mort> I'm still waiting on internet connection at my new place so there might not be a caption today, my sidekick doesn't have photoshop.

Zit fetishism even has a scientific name: acnephilia. Unlike armpit licking or monkey scritching.

<Lauren> I would think the armpit licking fetish would be called axillalingua and I hear they are looking for a webmaster... Hey, Mort, are you still unemployed?
<jellyloo> I am now mentally linking a man who looks like a muppet with zit squeezins. Nightmare fodder for sure.
<Mort> I am still gainfully unemployed!

Those lungs do look like Jim Henson creations, the good and evil lungs of the Dark Crystal.

<Frank Johnson> 
<apple juice is a verb>  Hope things get better, Mort
<Axolotl> At least there won't be stench wafting through the sockets in your new house!
<Lauren> Thanks for that bit of nostalgia, Axolotl. Now, do you know where the photo of Mort's alien-brain-wave protective hat is?
< online poker room> Rate online po
<Carol> Online po? Do you mean online poo? There's some of that around here, probably.
<Lauren> Carol, I think that was a Teletubby reference. Isn't Po the littlest one?
<guyPaulo> Indeed. Po is the little red one with the "circle" top to her antenna. Her "favorite thing" (each tubby has one) is her red scooter, which she mispronounces as "cooter". This is quite funny to us guys in the south, as "cooter" is a slang word for a woman's lady business.
<JP> Those silly brits. Just love to take the piss out of them.

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