[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 04/10/2005 by ElvisThePelvis
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Dear Penthouse, I know every letter begins with I couldn't believe it happened to me, but here is my story. I was at party and I ran into a hot brunette who asked if she could see my hairy beast. Well, it was sleeping, but I pulled it out anyway. She immediately dragged me into her car and we headed for her place.

On the way, she handed me what appeared to be a pair of panties and some fishnet nylons. I looked at her quizzically and she repeated "Put them on". I figured I had nothing to lose. She stopped the car and I got out and put on the two fishnet nylon stockings and one red pair of panties with what appeared to be three leg holes. I put on the underwear first and my hairy beast popped out of the center hole. I guess they were crotchless. The nylons I put on next. I have a lot of hair on my legs and they just looked stupid.

I felt like a total ass. I wasn't being humiliated so much as I had been disappointed. My little beast was still asleep and traffic was in chaos from my free show. In the car she ket saying I looked "so pretty". It did nothing for me but I kept my mouth shut.

Once we got to her house, she started to play with herself. I asked if she needed any help and she said "Oh no, we are keeping our hands to ourselves".

Eventually, She appeared to have enough of me and I certainly had enough of this. I gave her a peck on the cheek and left. She told me she would "never forget me".

I wanted to let Penthouse letters know that this woman is a total fruitcake and that any readers should just avoid her dumb sex game. Thanks in advance for publishing this warning.

Love, Elvis

(AP)
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Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

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All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


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Comments on Alternatives [Add Comment]

There are 5 comments for this caption.

<Bavid Dyrden> Dear Penthouse:
I bought this pornographic magazine and was overcome with feelings of lust. As soon as I got home I locked myself in the bathroom for a frantic game of pocket pool. Has this happened to any other readers?
<3Suns> Pocket pool, in a locked bathroom? Dude, you are a prude. =P
<mypalmike> This really happenned to you, didn't it, Elvis?
<ElvisThePelvis> Shut UP!!! It did not!! Not exactly like that...
<Kumiho> 

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