Most Emailed Photos

Most Emailed Photos - 04/10/2005

by ElvisThePelvis

<-- First

Choose an alternative caption: <

Last -->-->

Dear Penthouse, I know every letter begins with I couldn't believe it happened to me, but here is my story. I was at party and I ran into a hot brunette who asked if she could see my hairy beast. Well, it was sleeping, but I pulled it out anyway. She immediately dragged me into her car and we headed for her place.

On the way, she handed me what appeared to be a pair of panties and some fishnet nylons. I looked at her quizzically and she repeated "Put them on". I figured I had nothing to lose. She stopped the car and I got out and put on the two fishnet nylon stockings and one red pair of panties with what appeared to be three leg holes. I put on the underwear first and my hairy beast popped out of the center hole. I guess they were crotchless. The nylons I put on next. I have a lot of hair on my legs and they just looked stupid.

I felt like a total ass. I wasn't being humiliated so much as I had been disappointed. My little beast was still asleep and traffic was in chaos from my free show. In the car she ket saying I looked "so pretty". It did nothing for me but I kept my mouth shut.

Once we got to her house, she started to play with herself. I asked if she needed any help and she said "Oh no, we are keeping our hands to ourselves".

Eventually, She appeared to have enough of me and I certainly had enough of this. I gave her a peck on the cheek and left. She told me she would "never forget me".

I wanted to let Penthouse letters know that this woman is a total fruitcake and that any readers should just avoid her dumb sex game. Thanks in advance for publishing this warning.

Love, Elvis

(AP)

(Reuters)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.

History

These 5 things happened most recently.

Mr. Noname Lurker 15:05:46 drooled over #54

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:23:46 drooled over #666

Mr. Noname Lurker 13:52:24 drooled over #76

Mr. Noname Lurker 08:51:51 drooled over #102

Mr. Noname Lurker 09:22:14 drooled over #555

Current Users

There have been 217 users in the last 10 minutes.

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:30:07 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:30:06 Caption #648

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:30:05 Caption #662

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:30:04 Caption #835

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:30:03 Caption #614

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:30:02 Caption #12

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:30:01 Caption #687

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:57 Caption #938

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:55 Caption #676

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:53 Caption #854

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:52 Caption #397

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:51 Caption #41

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:49 Caption #31

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:47 Caption #577

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:46 Caption #77

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:45 Caption #603

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:44 Caption #4

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:43 Caption #4

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:42 Caption #191

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:41 Caption #0

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:40 Caption #44

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:39 Caption #514

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:38 Caption #857

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:35 Caption #390

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:32 Caption #282

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:31 Caption #447

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:28 Caption #889

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:27 Caption #849

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:25 Caption #646

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:24 Caption #203

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:23 Caption #19

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:22 Caption #26

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:21 Caption #233

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:20 Caption #485

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:19 Caption #263

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:18 Caption #30

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:16 Caption #396

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:15 Caption #55

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:14 Caption #76

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:13 Caption #372

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:12 Caption #319

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:11 Caption #6

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:10 Caption #84

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:09 Caption #541

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:08 Caption #706

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:07 Caption #594

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:04 Caption #518

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:29:02 Caption #531

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:58 Caption #881

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:56 Caption #173

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:55 Caption #241

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:54 Caption #758

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:53 Caption #962

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:52 Caption #663

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:48 Caption #742

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:47 Caption #948

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:44 Caption #15

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:43 Caption #118

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:42 Caption #951

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:41 Caption #677

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:39 Caption #328

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:37 Caption #380

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:36 Caption #743

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:35 Caption #539

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:32 Caption #536

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:31 Caption #647

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:27 Caption #323

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:25 Caption #214

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:24 Caption #73

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:23 Caption #47

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:22 Caption #6

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:21 Caption #703

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:20 Caption #5

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:19 Caption #68

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:18 Caption #793

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:17 Caption #3

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:16 Caption #141

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:15 Caption #396

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:13 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:12 Main Page

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:11 Caption #261

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:10 Caption #962

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:09 Caption #9

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:08 Caption #33

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:07 Caption #143

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:03 Caption #183

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:28:00 Caption #593

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:59 Caption #444

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:57 Caption #845

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:55 Caption #149

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:54 Caption #690

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:53 Caption #622

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:52 Caption #642

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:51 Caption #184

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:49 Caption #795

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:48 Caption #179

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:47 Caption #56

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:45 Caption #544

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:43 Caption #328

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:39 Caption #578

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:37 Caption #746

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:36 Caption #14

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:35 Caption #682

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:34 Caption #316

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:32 Caption #672

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:31 Caption #717

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:30 Caption #715

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:29 Caption #944

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:28 Caption #642

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:27 Caption #261

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:26 Caption #472

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:22 Caption #671

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:20 Caption #916

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:16 Caption #-8

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:15 Caption #687

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:11 Caption #299

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:10 Caption #846

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:09 Caption #533

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:08 Caption #395

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:07 Caption #566

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:03 Caption #440

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:27:00 Caption #388

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:59 Caption #204

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:58 Caption #543

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:56 Caption #82

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:55 Caption #416

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:54 Caption #688

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:52 Caption #126

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:51 Caption #82

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:50 Caption #365

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:47 Caption #639

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:43 Caption #469

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:42 Caption #110

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:40 Caption #16

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:37 Caption #903

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:36 Caption #723

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:35 Caption #515

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:32 Caption #125

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:31 Caption #33

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:28 Caption #732

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:27 Caption #632

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:26 Caption #476

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:25 Caption #853

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:23 Caption #658

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:20 Caption #407

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:19 Caption #871

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:15 Caption #305

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:14 Caption #90

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:11 Caption #21

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:10 Caption #420

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:07 Caption #533

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:26:04 Caption #74

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:59 Caption #544

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:58 Caption #454

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:56 Caption #6

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:55 Caption #575

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:53 Caption #351

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:51 Caption #16

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:47 Caption #84

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:44 Caption #348

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:43 Caption #90

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:42 Caption #16

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:37 Caption #796

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:35 Caption #640

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:33 Caption #31

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:32 Caption #340

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:30 Caption #390

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:29 Caption #641

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:28 Caption #346

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:25 Caption #355

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:23 Caption #455

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:21 Caption #544

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:19 Caption #740

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:16 Caption #437

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:15 Caption #582

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:11 Caption #686

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:10 Caption #20

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:09 Caption #773

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:08 Caption #662

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:03 Caption #444

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:01 Caption #284

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:25:00 Caption #213

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:59 Caption #355

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:57 Caption #406

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:56 Caption #151

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:55 Caption #300

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:53 Caption #929

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:51 Caption #34

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:48 Caption #308

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:47 Caption #120

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:43 Caption #221

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:42 Caption #243

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:41 Caption #416

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:39 Caption #531

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:35 Caption #422

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:33 Caption #473

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:31 Caption #246

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:30 Caption #294

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:28 Caption #904

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:27 Caption #683

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:26 Caption #825

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:23 Caption #762

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:21 Caption #565

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:20 Caption #515

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:18 Caption #322

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:17 Caption #148

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:15 Caption #580

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:11 Caption #161

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:10 Caption #453

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:09 Caption #664

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:07 Caption #776

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:04 Caption #568

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:02 Caption #588

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:01 Caption #67

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:24:00 Caption #54

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:23:59 Caption #287

Mr. Noname Lurker 23:23:56 Caption #506

Comments on Alternatives

[Add Comment]

There are 5 comments for this caption.

<Bavid Dyrden> Dear Penthouse:
I bought this pornographic magazine and was overcome with feelings of lust. As soon as I got home I locked myself in the bathroom for a frantic game of pocket pool. Has this happened to any other readers?
<3Suns> Pocket pool, in a locked bathroom? Dude, you are a prude. =P
<mypalmike> This really happenned to you, didn't it, Elvis?
<ElvisThePelvis> Shut UP!!! It did not!! Not exactly like that...
<Kumiho>

Add a comment about this alternative caption:
Name:
Vote: What this means
Comment:

Click the monkey to post