[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 04/10/2005 by ElvisThePelvis
<--  First Choose an alternative caption: <   Last   -->-->

Dear Penthouse, I know every letter begins with I couldn't believe it happened to me, but here is my story. I was at party and I ran into a hot brunette who asked if she could see my hairy beast. Well, it was sleeping, but I pulled it out anyway. She immediately dragged me into her car and we headed for her place.

On the way, she handed me what appeared to be a pair of panties and some fishnet nylons. I looked at her quizzically and she repeated "Put them on". I figured I had nothing to lose. She stopped the car and I got out and put on the two fishnet nylon stockings and one red pair of panties with what appeared to be three leg holes. I put on the underwear first and my hairy beast popped out of the center hole. I guess they were crotchless. The nylons I put on next. I have a lot of hair on my legs and they just looked stupid.

I felt like a total ass. I wasn't being humiliated so much as I had been disappointed. My little beast was still asleep and traffic was in chaos from my free show. In the car she ket saying I looked "so pretty". It did nothing for me but I kept my mouth shut.


Once we got to her house, she started to play with herself. I asked if she needed any help and she said "Oh no, we are keeping our hands to ourselves".

Eventually, She appeared to have enough of me and I certainly had enough of this. I gave her a peck on the cheek and left. She told me she would "never forget me".

I wanted to let Penthouse letters know that this woman is a total fruitcake and that any readers should just avoid her dumb sex game. Thanks in advance for publishing this warning.

Love, Elvis

(AP)
(AP)
(Reuters)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 244 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:54Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:53Caption #-5
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:52Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:51Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:50Caption #373
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:49Caption #658
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:48Caption #404
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:47Caption #429
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:46Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:43Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:42Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:35Caption #645
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:34Caption #939
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:31Caption #25
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:29Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:28Caption #609
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:27Caption #595
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:26Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:25Caption #644
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:24Caption #491
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:23Caption #681
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:22Caption #578
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:21Caption #-17
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:19Caption #671
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:08Caption #89
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:07Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:04Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:03Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker14:26:02Caption #767
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:59Caption #150
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:57Caption #772
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:56Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:52Caption #39
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:44Caption #530
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:41Caption #768
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:28Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:27Caption #665
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:26Caption #492
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:25Caption #662
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:24Caption #341
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:23Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:20Caption #508
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:19Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:18Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:17Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:12Caption #543
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:05Caption #774
Mr. NonameLurker14:25:03Caption #105
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:59Caption #190
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:56Caption #568
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:52Caption #165
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:50Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:49Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:48Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:38Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:36Caption #198
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:35Caption #480
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:31Caption #210
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:30Caption #166
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:28Caption #608
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:27Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:24Caption #356
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:23Caption #77
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:21Caption #-14
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:16Caption #472
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:12Caption #317
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:07Caption #178
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:06Caption #696
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:05Caption #476
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:04Caption #736
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:03Caption #700
Mr. NonameLurker14:24:01Caption #17
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:58Caption #757
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:57Caption #380
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:56Caption #537
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:55Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:54Caption #464
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:53Caption #708
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:52Caption #158
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:41Caption #342
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:39Caption #607
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:36Caption #-29
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:35Caption #203
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:31Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:29Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:27Caption #264
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:23Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:22Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:21Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:20Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:19Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:18Caption #181
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:17Caption #771
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:15Caption #497
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:11Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:08Caption #85
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:07Caption #818
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:06Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:03Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:01Caption #34
Mr. NonameLurker14:23:00Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:59Caption #612
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:56Caption #236
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:52Caption #228
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:49Caption #638
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:44Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:43Caption #633
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:42Caption #19
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:41Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:40Caption #-22
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:39Caption #327
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:38Caption #787
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:37Caption #269
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:36Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:35Caption #586
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:32Caption #318
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:23Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:19Caption #521
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:17Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:15Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:14Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:13Caption #330
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:12Caption #591
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:11Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:10Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:09Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:08Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:07Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker14:22:04Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:58Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:56Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:51Caption #127
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:50Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:47Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:44Caption #571
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:40Caption #686
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:39Caption #828
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:38Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:35Caption #188
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:33Caption #604
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:32Caption #763
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:30Caption #513
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:27Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:24Caption #149
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:17Caption #924
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:12Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:11Caption #704
Mr. NonameLurker14:21:02Caption #355
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:58Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:55Caption #241
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:51Caption #627
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:49Caption #623
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:47Caption #544
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:46Caption #798
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:44Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:39Caption #705
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:38Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:37Caption #169
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:35Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:33Caption #222
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:32Caption #28
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:28Caption #-51
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:27Caption #533
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:25Caption #245
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:24Caption #227
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:22Caption #367
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:19Caption #78
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:16Caption #114
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:11Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:09Caption #412
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:02Caption #336
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:01Caption #323
Mr. NonameLurker14:20:00Caption #365
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:57Caption #27
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:56Caption #848
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:55Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:52Caption #911
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:51Caption #734
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:50Caption #539
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:46Caption #232
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:43Caption #182
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:39Caption #233
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:36Caption #6
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:34Caption #164
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:31Caption #167
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:30Caption #200
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:29Caption #68
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:28Caption #14
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:26Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:25Caption #106
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:24Caption #168
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:23Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:19Caption #286
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:16Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:15Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:13Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:11Caption #593
Mr. NonameLurker14:19:05Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:55Caption #79
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:51Caption #117
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:50Caption #-15
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:46Caption #313
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:43Caption #45
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:41Caption #519
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:38Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:31Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:26Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:25Caption #55
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:21Caption #893
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:15Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:14Caption #484
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:14Caption #369
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:13Caption #298
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:11Caption #52
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:07Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:05Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker14:18:04Caption #197
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:59Caption #690
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:56Caption #435
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:51Caption #159
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:47Caption #32
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:44Caption #392
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:42Caption #65
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:40Caption #779
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:39Caption #832
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:36Caption #-18
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:31Caption #402
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:30Caption #617
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:29Caption #669
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:28Caption #132
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:26Main Page
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:25Caption #583
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:24Caption #7
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:23Caption #485
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:22Caption #47
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:20Caption #659
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:18Caption #555
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:12Caption #495
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:08Caption #349
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:03Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker14:17:00Caption #726
Mr. NonameLurker14:16:59Caption #-30
Mr. NonameLurker14:16:56Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker14:16:55Caption #450

Comments on Alternatives [Add Comment]

There are 5 comments for this caption.

<Bavid Dyrden> Dear Penthouse:
I bought this pornographic magazine and was overcome with feelings of lust. As soon as I got home I locked myself in the bathroom for a frantic game of pocket pool. Has this happened to any other readers?
<3Suns> Pocket pool, in a locked bathroom? Dude, you are a prude. =P
<mypalmike> This really happenned to you, didn't it, Elvis?
<ElvisThePelvis> Shut UP!!! It did not!! Not exactly like that...
<Kumiho> 

Add a comment about this alternative caption:
Name:
Vote: What this means
Comment:


Click the monkey to post