[Most Emailed Photos] [Most Fortunate Fortune]

Most Emailed Photos - 04/10/2005 by ElvisThePelvis
<--  First Choose an alternative caption: <   Last   -->-->

Dear Penthouse, I know every letter begins with I couldn't believe it happened to me, but here is my story. I was at party and I ran into a hot brunette who asked if she could see my hairy beast. Well, it was sleeping, but I pulled it out anyway. She immediately dragged me into her car and we headed for her place.

On the way, she handed me what appeared to be a pair of panties and some fishnet nylons. I looked at her quizzically and she repeated "Put them on". I figured I had nothing to lose. She stopped the car and I got out and put on the two fishnet nylon stockings and one red pair of panties with what appeared to be three leg holes. I put on the underwear first and my hairy beast popped out of the center hole. I guess they were crotchless. The nylons I put on next. I have a lot of hair on my legs and they just looked stupid.

I felt like a total ass. I wasn't being humiliated so much as I had been disappointed. My little beast was still asleep and traffic was in chaos from my free show. In the car she ket saying I looked "so pretty". It did nothing for me but I kept my mouth shut.


Once we got to her house, she started to play with herself. I asked if she needed any help and she said "Oh no, we are keeping our hands to ourselves".

Eventually, She appeared to have enough of me and I certainly had enough of this. I gave her a peck on the cheek and left. She told me she would "never forget me".

I wanted to let Penthouse letters know that this woman is a total fruitcake and that any readers should just avoid her dumb sex game. Thanks in advance for publishing this warning.

Love, Elvis

(AP)
(AP)
(Reuters)

Description

The challenge was to take the top 3 most emailed photos on yahoo and create a hopefully amusing story about the sequence. I reserve the right to refuse a disturbing picture, this includes any pictures of celine dion.

Please feel free to add alternative captions if you can or comments if you can't.

All rights to the photos belong to the companies in brackets beneath them. All text, concepts and layout is copyright Mort 2003-2007.


History

These 5 things happened most recently.
Mr. NonameLurker15:05:46drooled over #54
Mr. NonameLurker08:23:46drooled over #666
Mr. NonameLurker13:52:24drooled over #76
Mr. NonameLurker08:51:51drooled over #102
Mr. NonameLurker09:22:14drooled over #555


Current Users

There have been 237 users in the last 10 minutes.
Mr. NonameLurker17:36:07Caption #5
Mr. NonameLurker17:36:06Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker17:36:04Caption #467
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:56Caption #12
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:55Caption #714
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:50Caption #345
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:39Caption #795
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:35Caption #478
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:28Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:25Caption #431
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:23Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:20Caption #856
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:18Caption #801
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:13Caption #816
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:08Caption #259
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:07Caption #542
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:05Caption #609
Mr. NonameLurker17:35:01Caption #94
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:56Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:54Caption #546
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:52Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:51Caption #61
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:50Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:49Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:48Caption #579
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:41Caption #291
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:40Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:39Caption #636
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:38Caption #624
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:37Caption #598
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:36Caption #922
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:35Caption #506
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:34Caption #-2
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:33Caption #676
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:32Caption #610
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:31Caption #100
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:30Caption #496
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:29Caption #601
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:28Caption #206
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:27Caption #54
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:26Caption #824
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:18Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:15Caption #126
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:13Caption #706
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:12Caption #498
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:10Caption #494
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:09Caption #374
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:08Caption #95
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:08Caption #411
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:06Caption #88
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:05Caption #346
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:04Caption #888
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:03Caption #180
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:02Caption #695
Mr. NonameLurker17:34:00Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:58Caption #553
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:57Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:51Caption #466
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:50Caption #273
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:49Caption #694
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:48Caption #468
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:47Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:46Caption #626
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:45Caption #16
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:44Caption #296
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:42Caption #838
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:36Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:30Caption #522
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:27Caption #630
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:26Caption #789
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:20Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:14Caption #911
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:12Caption #90
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:04Caption #771
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:03Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:02Caption #572
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:01Caption #793
Mr. NonameLurker17:33:00Caption #92
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:59Caption #589
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:58Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:57Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:56Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:55Caption #219
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:54Caption #813
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:42Caption #81
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:38Caption #554
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:36Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:29Caption #187
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:25Caption #182
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:24Caption #444
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:23Caption #370
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:22Caption #271
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:21Caption #364
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:20Caption #390
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:19Caption #36
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:18Caption #184
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:14Caption #538
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:08Caption #109
Mr. NonameLurker17:32:00Caption #835
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:52Caption #770
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:36Caption #182
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:29Caption #507
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:28Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:27Caption #-28
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:26Caption #782
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:25Caption #790
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:24Caption #172
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:23Caption #838
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:22Caption #371
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:19Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:04Caption #592
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:03Caption #486
Mr. NonameLurker17:31:01Caption #56
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:54Caption #514
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:52Caption #153
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:51Caption #409
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:49Caption #9
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:47Caption #312
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:31Caption #40
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:28Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:25Caption #611
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:24Caption #716
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:23Caption #20
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:22Caption #882
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:21Caption #717
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:20Caption #968
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:19Caption #179
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:18Caption #64
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:17Caption #758
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:16Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:15Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:14Caption #922
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:13Caption #723
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:12Caption #30
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:11Caption #251
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:10Caption #18
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:09Caption #124
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:08Caption #559
Mr. NonameLurker17:30:07Caption #964
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:59Caption #749
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:57Caption #247
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:56Caption #1
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:55Caption #76
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:54Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:53Caption #0
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:52Caption #565
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:51Caption #707
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:50Caption #10
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:48Caption #515
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:42Caption #113
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:39Caption #864
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:36Caption #618
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:34Caption #848
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:29Caption #321
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:28Caption #48
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:26Caption #121
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:20Caption #276
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:17Caption #115
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:14Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:09Caption #133
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:08Caption #143
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:07Caption #547
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:06Caption #413
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:05Caption #185
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:04Caption #86
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:03Caption #609
Mr. NonameLurker17:29:00Caption #637
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:53Caption #177
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:45Caption #-40
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:37Caption #129
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:36Caption #427
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:35Caption #452
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:34Caption #112
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:33Caption #350
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:32Caption #602
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:30Caption #925
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:27Caption #110
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:24Caption #679
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:22Caption #534
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:20Caption #934
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:14Caption #154
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:13Caption #529
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:10Caption #590
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:09Caption #650
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:08Caption #80
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:07Caption #49
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:06Caption #425
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:05Caption #335
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:01Caption #625
Mr. NonameLurker17:28:00Caption #852
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:58Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:57Caption #80
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:55Caption #221
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:50Caption #737
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:49Caption #2
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:44Caption #263
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:42Caption #410
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:38Caption #280
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:33Caption #238
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:26Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:24Caption #253
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:23Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:22Caption #219
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:21Caption #204
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:20Caption #474
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:19Caption #566
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:18Caption #383
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:17Caption #845
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:16Caption #24
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:13Caption #585
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:10Caption #331
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:08Caption #216
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:07Caption #395
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:06Caption #594
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:05Caption #316
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:04Caption #525
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:03Caption #75
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:01Caption #520
Mr. NonameLurker17:27:00Caption #256
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:58Caption #91
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:52Caption #57
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:46Caption #128
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:44Caption #274
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:42Caption #448
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:37Caption #174
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:34Caption #997
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:31Caption #256
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:30Caption #457
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:29Caption #780
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:28Caption #285
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:26Caption #308
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:13Caption #454
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:12Caption #3
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:11Caption #562
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:09Caption #393
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:08Caption #204
Mr. NonameLurker17:26:07Caption #10

Comments on Alternatives [Add Comment]

There are 5 comments for this caption.

<Bavid Dyrden> Dear Penthouse:
I bought this pornographic magazine and was overcome with feelings of lust. As soon as I got home I locked myself in the bathroom for a frantic game of pocket pool. Has this happened to any other readers?
<3Suns> Pocket pool, in a locked bathroom? Dude, you are a prude. =P
<mypalmike> This really happenned to you, didn't it, Elvis?
<ElvisThePelvis> Shut UP!!! It did not!! Not exactly like that...
<Kumiho> 

Add a comment about this alternative caption:
Name:
Vote: What this means
Comment:


Click the monkey to post